New career working Christmas as single parent

Do you not understand it? What is your point?

Missing the point of the post but I just can’t get past the on tap paid for childcare for 5 children under 12 on bank holidays, early mornings, evenings and weekends and it’s never ever an issue except Christmas Day.

Too late now @ItsSpookySeason as you’ve signed a contract but I’ll say it again. Look into primary care. You’re not employed by the trust and nothing to do with them - you are employed directly by the partners in a surgery. It’s their business and they can hire at will, unencumbered by the HR tangle that you’ll find in a trust. They may advertise on NHS jobs, local primary care network or ICB websites etc.

As a single parent with a frequently absent ex and a child with complex needs working in primary care was the only way I could maintain a nursing career. There was no flexibility in hospital roles at all.

Maybe speak to a local church. I know a lot of them work hard to offer gatherings etc. to make sure people aren't alone on Christmas Day. You might find that they have people on their team who would be suitable and willing to offer childcare too.
It might not be ideal, but it's a possibility?

And well done OP on completing your course!

You will generally have the option to chose which of the ‘key days’ you prefer from Christmas Eve, day or Boxing day and then NYE/NYD. No guarantees but some people prefer CE off.

Some wards will split the 12 hour shifts so there may be an option to use some AL on the key days.

I was always more than happy to work Christmas before I had kids and assumed the same courtesy would apply when I had my kids. It didn’t 😉

If all else fails, you may have to consider exceptional/unpaid leave.

In a perfect world absolutely but unfortunately in the real world you do sometimes have to make sacrifices. Being a single parent without a support system doesn't work, doing 13hr shifts that covers day, nights, weekends and holidays. Why the children are still so young

Absolutely you shouldn't but unfortunately sometimes life happens and you have to work a job that fits in with children while their so young.

@MumChp I don't think this is true. You have no idea how difficult it can be working a 13 hour shift as a single parent. I don't want to be negative as OP has done so well to complete a nursing degree with 5 DC!

However I actually am a single mum also work in the NHS with 0 family help. 7am starts, 8pm finishes and night shifts would not be fair on OPs children at all.

I hope OP can perhaps use her degree some how maybe a non clinical job role? But still nursing.

I think OP needs to apply for outpatients ASAP.

Lots of parents adjust having children. This nurse won't be the only one struggling to balance family and work. NHS is tbh full of struggling nurses.

My husband is a teacher. So much easier as a parent. If I had a second go I would opt for that or another similar 9-17 job.

Why. What is she supposed to do for money in the meantime? She needs to earn a living for herself. Your working years go by in the blink on an eye. You shouldn’t have to give up a career for children

True, but she needs to get experience now, having just qualified

But she can still hold of a few years if need be she will still be qualified in a few years when her situation is better

OP - will you keep us updated about what happens. There has to be a solution- somewhere

When she started I think she had support, but things then went wrong, as often happens in life.

No I would hold of 5 years before starting a career with such unsociable hours with 5 young children and no support network

Is it worth advertising for paid child care over the Christmas period ? There will be someone who doesn't celebrate for religious reasons and will be glad of the extra money. Obviously their credentials will need checking out but I think it's worth a try.

There are always many people who are alone at Christmas and are looking for volunteer work. There is someone out there who would be glad of this opportunity. You just need to find them! (Hard I know as you are ridiculously busy with your family and work).

I really think it depends on the unit/ward. At my hospital they are very flexible and accommodating, and it’s in London so the staff are very diverse, many Muslim colleagues or different branches of Christianity where NYE or Christmas Eve is the big celebration day and not Christmas Day. I’ve never worked Christmas Day and it’s absolutely fine.

This, 100%. You've phrased this perfectly. It's not that people want to see others struggle, but when you've worked the past two Christmases (after two Christmases in lockdown) you don't want to be covering it again. Everyone has their own lives.

I literally asked if she could bank. I never suggested not working, but shifts are not compatible with 5 kids and no childcare.

You should offer more.
If you want to swap a shift 25.12 as a nurse it's often not enough to offer 24.12 or 1.1.

Surely as a one off under the circumstances asking your sister for help makes most sense. I appreciate you say she's moved away and you don't want to ask but surely Christmas is different and she'd want to help if she knew how stuck you were

I do feel sorry for your situation OP, it sounds like you've worked incredibly hard to get to where you are now. Unfortunately I have no help I can give. I've nursed for 15 years and know from personal experience that the Christmas rota is done in a very "unemotional" manor meaning that it doesn't take into account personal circumstances aside from who worked the key shifts the previous year (Christmas eve night, Christmas day early/late/night and boxing day). You will very likely be rostered on to one of those shifts. Your option is to see if any of your colleagues can swap. The posters who have been saying you'll be unpopular if you request not to work your first Christmas have been unkind (but not wrong), I think it would be better to ask than to be rostered on and then leave the ward short staffed by not turning up on your allocated shift. In saying all that, clinic jobs (even after a year on a ward) are hard to come by and very much in demand. Usually specialist roles are reserved for nurses with more experience so you may find yourself as a ward nurse for a while longer yet, so might be best to find alternative child care over Christmas.

I would be amazed if no one at your job will help out. I have worked in nhs for 25 years a large chunk shift work on wards and we always used to help each other out. I’ve young kids but if my colleague was having to leave her young kids with a stranger on Christmas Day I would work it for her. Most people are kind OP. Don’t panic. I’m sure if you offer Christmas Eve and new years you will be seen to be doing your bit.

Ditto, she’s amazing.

No suggestions for you OP but I just wanted to say what a fantastic job you’re making of life. It must have been bloody hard getting this far, and as a single parent without the same so-acute childcare isshes, I am in awe of what you have achieved. talk to your manager and look into emergency nanny cover via agencies - remember that there are many others in the profession to whole Christmas is an opportunity to make some extra cash.