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Original poster

Does anyone else's DH do this?

213 replies

McSteamyorMcdreamy · 27/07/2024 15:55

Give you an update (invariably a bad one) about the kids when you are on an afternoon out with your friends?

Without fail. Every. Single. Time. I have been out for an hour and I have already had the text message to say that my youngest is playing up and "oh im in for a good night, hope you are enjoying yourself".

Why does he do it?? I now feel shit and feel compelled to go home.

OP posts:
TomatoSandwiches · 27/07/2024 16:06

Just ignore it now and have words when you get back that he is not to text you whilst out unless it is a life saving emergency.

My husband did this once with our first and I text back that I didn't give a shit and to figure it out like have to everyday and hasn't done it ever again.

Ukholidaysaregreat · 27/07/2024 16:06

Just write back 'O dear. Hope you are OK' that will do, then get on with your night. He is trying to spanner it up on purpose. Don't feel guilty. He has to look after his own kids for one night. Boo hoo!

stayathomer · 27/07/2024 16:05

I did this the other night🙈 Dh was out with work, kids were all up, all I wanted was bed and I sent a ‘hope you’re having a good one’(I meant this) ‘kids still up, I just want them to go to beddddd!!(cry face!)’

StonwEd · 27/07/2024 16:05

My ex husband used to. It’s controlling and abusive. Unless he genuinely doesn’t realise the effect then it’s just silly - have you told him how it makes you feel?

GalacticalFarce · 27/07/2024 16:04

He's pissed off that he's stuck at home with his kids while you're out enjoying yourself.
It's not that bad for him but he's exaggerating it so you feel shit and either don't enjoy yourself, like he isn't, or you come home and not enjoy yourself and he does.
Reply with "As you're their dad, I trust you to handle it" and then ignore him.

Aquamarine1029 · 27/07/2024 16:04

McSteamyorMcdreamy · 27/07/2024 16:03

@Aquamarine1029 it's like my BF has just joined mumsnet to tell me that!

It's a fucking shame you don't listen to her.

Original poster
McSteamyorMcdreamy · 27/07/2024 16:03

@Aquamarine1029 it's like my BF has just joined mumsnet to tell me that!

OP posts:
NeverEnoughPants · 27/07/2024 16:03

Do the same to him the next time he's on a night out. And keep doing it till he gets the message.

Aquamarine1029 · 27/07/2024 16:01

Your husband does this to deliberately ruin your evening. He is going out of his way to make you feel like shit. What a fucking charmer, and I am sure this isn't the only twatish thing he does.

Why you are putting up with this bullshit is beyond me.

Furrydogmum · 27/07/2024 16:00

Don't let him control you like this. Don't go home, he's an equal parent!

Cliedi · 27/07/2024 15:59

Nope. He does the opposite and doesn’t tell me anything(unless serious) because he knows I would worry and stress and he wants me to relax and have a good time. I don’t go out that often to be fair!

Have you tried telling him not to do it?

Ponoka7 · 27/07/2024 15:58

He does it so you feel shit and go home. Ignore and carry on with your night. Then when you are in one evening have it out with him. Kids aren't easy, welcome to the world of parenting. He needs to plan better.

Marmite27 · 27/07/2024 15:56

Mine used to do it, until I had words. He now doesn’t.

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