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AIBU?

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Original poster

Does anyone else's DH do this?

213 replies

McSteamyorMcdreamy · 27/07/2024 15:55

Give you an update (invariably a bad one) about the kids when you are on an afternoon out with your friends?

Without fail. Every. Single. Time. I have been out for an hour and I have already had the text message to say that my youngest is playing up and "oh im in for a good night, hope you are enjoying yourself".

Why does he do it?? I now feel shit and feel compelled to go home.

OP posts:
Teasloth · 28/07/2024 18:06

What's happened today? Hope you stood your ground and called him the prick he is

fetchacloth · 28/07/2024 17:37

It's just a guilt trip. Ignore him

DeeplyMovingExperience · 28/07/2024 10:07

What the fuck?

What does he think you are? His servant? A domestic appliance that is not permitted to do anything other than drudge work in the home?

Is he aware that he too is a parent with parenting responsibilities?

I would go on immediate wife strike, stop doing anything for him, and seriously consider what I want my future to hold.

What a complete and utter arsehole.

pinkyredrose · 28/07/2024 09:51

He sounds like a fucking arsehole. Was he like this before parenthood?

Candlelights1 · 28/07/2024 08:34

Wake up OP you are in a controlling abusive relationship.

Call Womens aid for support and advice.
This is a bad man.
He is punishing you for going out.
Coercive control.....which is now a crime!

Look it up.

ssd · 28/07/2024 07:56

He texts you cos its all about him. Set him straight. If he doesn't listen, split.

kitchendiscotime · 28/07/2024 07:49

Just read your update. What an absolute cunt!

Ilovemyshed · 28/07/2024 07:25

Respond back "and? You are their parent too, so deal with it. Phone now going off."

autienotnaughty · 28/07/2024 07:07

Oh and it's definitely Mcsteamy!!

autienotnaughty · 28/07/2024 07:06

He's a equal parent of course it's his job to
manage the kids when your not there. If I receive a text like that I would have said 'oh no! Hope bedtime goes quick! '

Why would he tell you, you are disgusting ?
What a horrible thing to say.

Nanaof1 · 28/07/2024 07:01

McSteamyorMcdreamy · 27/07/2024 16:03

@Aquamarine1029 it's like my BF has just joined mumsnet to tell me that!

Next time, text him back, "Welcome to my world. Enjoy!".
I now see a PP said the same thing. Like minds think great. 🙃

Edited to also add: Calling you disgusting is way, way over the line. Please don't let him get away with that kind of degrading comment. Is he like this often?

Icanttakethisanymore · 28/07/2024 07:01

He called you disgusting? I hope you haven’t got to a point where you can’t see how horrific that is.

Zonder · 28/07/2024 07:00

YABU to be checking your phone. Tell him next time that you can't see texts because you're not on your phone but in a real emergency he can call.

Iloveacurry · 28/07/2024 06:57

And I bet HE never goes out with his friends and leaves you at home looking after the children?!

dottiedodah · 28/07/2024 06:49

I would turn my phone off!(Actually have done this due to similar"Oh sorry to worry you,cant find Teddy/Those biscuits she likes/she just wanted to say goodnight) Or do it back to him. Men are able to parent ,they just dont want to!

earlymorningcurlewcall · 28/07/2024 06:49

I wouldn't have batted an eyelid at the first message.

OP's update was showing his shitty behaviour for sure. What a prick.

Daleksatemyshed · 28/07/2024 06:42

He's another one who thinks he's doing you a favour by looking after his own DC, tell him straight, he is their DF and should be able to look after his own children. You can bet your life if you left he'd soon be shouting about his right to see his kids.

ZoeLoey · 28/07/2024 06:38

Every single time the kids acted up I'd text him. Even if he's in work. He doesn't sound very nice. I'd be planning my getaway

Flibflobflibflob · 28/07/2024 06:35

McSteamyorMcdreamy · 27/07/2024 23:51

So.....it's 23.42... I responded with: "Oh well" I then got a phone call telling me that he wouldn't go to sleep until I got in, because he wanted to make sure I was home safe.

I am home safe now. Just getting a glass of water and he walks in the kitchen, tells me I'm disgusting and walks back in the bedroom.

Let's see what happens in the morning,🙄

Wtf, thats completely unacceptable, he’s awful

LadyGaGasPokerFace · 28/07/2024 06:27

Tell him ‘suck it up buttercup!’ He’s the disgusting one. Go get some sleep. He only stayed awake to berate you. He doesn’t k ow how to handle the dc is his problem. Just shows how incompetent he is.

Leafygreen84 · 28/07/2024 06:22

OP I hope you’re ok. This is controlling and manipulative. Youre not unreasonable and his behaviour isn’t ok.

Shoxfordian · 28/07/2024 06:17

Hope you had some sleep and can think about whether you want to be with someone who makes you feel like this, it's not ok

Penguinsmum · 28/07/2024 05:21

HE sounds disgusting!

Newnamehiwhodis · 28/07/2024 05:20

Oh wow. Just read the update. Nah, he’s the one who it’s disgusting. I would not stay with a twerp like this.

Newnamehiwhodis · 28/07/2024 05:18

What a childish, helpless little baby text to send you. He can bloody well grow up and be a parent.

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