Not trying to be inflammatory but why do people *need* more than two kids?

No I did not touch a nerve.

Just shocked that someone could make themselves look so stupid by writing such bile.

My parents kept trying for a boy. I suspect there’s a lot of that.

If you find the form, please DM with it as I can not seem to find it anywhere on here.

I will also just to give proof send MN our accountants tax calculations.

Hope that this helps the posters worries.

😂 Why do people think this is a clever comeback?? It really really isn’t.

Benefits never factored into our decision on how many children to have, we don’t claim any. Our 2 child cap was based on my age. Unfortunately in London by the time you’ve bought the big house and have the space and money for lots of children and a nice lifestyle for them time is running against you.

Did I touch a nerve?

🤣🥰

I felt a need to have DCs because I have no other family.

You will find that adults who've been in care have more DCs than the general population.

Are wealthy posters not welcome? Was there a form I should have filled in detailing our household income before I signed up?

My response was both based on an op which said, simply, ‘just that’ so no mention of the benefits cap when I responded and a pp who asked why people didn’t stop and consider whether they could afford more children after having their first. I’d not have mentioned my own personal circumstances had it not been for that particular post.

I doubt there will ever come a time when the cap can be lifted, it's here to stay.

The issue is being politicised at the moment, the SNP tabled it because they're running scared of Labour ousting them in the next Scottish elections.

We have 3 kids and both work in professional jobs.

To the OP, we have three as just didn’t feel done after two and wanted another. I feel no guilt for wider society as we receive no benefits and the two who are school age are model pupils.

We’re the sought of family society should be encouraging to have more children but who often doesn’t.

Seriously. Just fuck right off with your stupid, ignorant, judgemental bullshit. Maybe YOU can’t do all those (fairly fucking minimal) things properly, but I assure you my 4 private school and now university educated young adult children are and were perfectly hygienic, got any medical/paramedical care they needed, clean bedding (ffs 🙄), their own bedrooms, and have excellent manners. The only one of your list they “suffered” was wearing hand-me-downs. They seem to have pulled through that without too much damage.

If the question is about child benefit and universal credit eligibility, why punish the children because of the decisions of one or more adults. Some larger families may come about because of coercive control of the father and/or a refusal to use certain contraception.

If someone can afford to have multiple children without depending on benefits then it really doesn't matter how many children they have. There are lots of parents with 1 or 2 children and they don't make their children their priority.

You can drive meaning and satisfaction from work, but a career is not the be all and end all of life.

Neither is having children IMO.

There are a lot of wealthy posters on mumsnet these days.

Anyone having their own room is a very modern and, worldwide, unusual thing. We're the outliers here.

This. You can drive meaning and satisfaction from work, but a career is not the be all and end all of life. You're 100% replaceable at work, but not to your family.

Also your second paragraph does actually ring true in my experience, particularly with men. I'm sure many of us have seen the men who are in the office from 8am - 8pm who have no wife, no kids but a big career. It's tragic really, even more so the ones who can work from home but still come in twelve hours five days a week.

I don't know the statistics but imagine that most families these days would stop at two children because of economic circumstances.

My two are now in their 40s - could have afforded more but two was enough. Back in the 70/80s it was easy to buy a family home on two average incomes which is obviously not the case now.

So all families that have more than 2 children are claiming benefits...... so basically a benefit bashing post.

We are a family of 4 children, never claimed benefits not entitled to child benefit, private dentist, private schools, private GP only use the NHS when an emergency or long term condition, although see the consultant privately.

Can you imagine the uproar on MN if people made sweeping generalisation/stereotypes on other numbers of children or social economical groups.

I'm assuming cost to taxpayer?

Because I had two children in an abusive relationship, which I left.

And would like to have a child in a loving relationship with my partner. I don't need another one.

They don't 'need' them, they often want them. Some like to be stretched, some have a third by accident but it turns out happily.

Before I married, I always wanted three children but ended up with one :-). No complaints, that all turned out happily.