My DH and I share a 10-month-old DD. We are pretty confident we don't want any more children. DH is a fair bit older than I am and we live in a house that he bought decades back; he finished paying the mortgage off a few years ago. I'm aware that this immediately puts us in a really lucky position.
It's a smallish terraced house - 3 rooms up and 3 rooms down. All rooms are fairly small. There are two bedrooms and DD's in particular isn't very generous in size unfortunately. There is a nice little garden. The area isn't very 'desirable' on paper but the location does work well for us - we're close to DH's family and to mine, walking distance from schools and children's play areas, a 5-min drive from where DH and I both work and there are lovely dog walks close by.
DH and I have both recently moved into new roles at work with higher salaries (still not that high as we both work in the public sector in non-senior-management positions, but enough to make a nice difference). Our first instinct was to buy a new house together with a bigger bedroom for DD, a bigger garden for her to play in and more room for guests. However, our current house isn't worth a great deal and I didn't own my own home before meeting DH so don't have that to bring to the party. We've worked out that to buy a house locally that is appreciably larger, we're going to be about £150,000 short - and that is assuming we get the asking price for our current house and that we pour all of our combined savings into the new one.
My DH is about 10 years' from retirement and from my shopping around so far, that understandably has a big impact on the sort of mortgage we're able to get.
AIBU to suggest just staying in this house? My thinking is that:
- We will get to stay mortgage-free and DH won't have the pressure on his shoulders to keep working for longer than he wants to.
- When he does retire and our household income drops dramatically, we will still be able to afford some holidays and treats. If we were still paying a mortgage off, things would be a lot tighter.
It seems like loads of families cope with having relatively little space, and I'd hope that things like family holidays, nice days out and saving more towards her future would more than make up for things being a bit cramped for DD... Or am I being naive? Some in my family have suggested we're being short-sighted and even selfish if we make this choice.
Once again, I'm aware that being in this position is a luxury. Thanks so much to anyone who has taken the time to read this and has any insights to share!
YABU - you should take the opportunity to move, even if it means belt-tightening.
YANBU - it's fine to stay in a smaller house, even if it's a bit cramped.