Pulled up for “picking on someone at work”.

This is the sort of thing that happened when agency staff were brought in to help me. Because I worked for the company full time there was an ingrained attitude that it wasn’t their job so they weren’t going to put themselves out.

I just want to do my job, and I don’t want extra work. I’m trying to work out how I approach this

You approach it by presenting it to your own managers as a workload issue, explaining that since you obviously can't do it all you need guidance on what they want you to prioritise

Leaving it for staff to sort among themselves only works up to a point, and when issues like this arise it's their job to step in - otherwise you get this pathetic, playground-like "they're picking on me!!" nonsense

So you’re working the latter part of the week do everything is basically falling to you as deadlines and clean ups need to be completed by Friday?

Which is why I said it. Because it’s the right way to go.

Well if you have been holding it down, by covering the lack of work, the loss of your input will show.
When you get back if they ask you to pick up the undone jobs, ask who was supposed to have done covered it.
Send an email to your boss each time.
Hey just to confirm you need me to do x, is this before I complete y, or do I put that on hold for x?
As to the kitchen, take photos, then just wash your own mug.

Yes and it would be an ideal time to speak to management ‘we have an issue as the new employees are not pulling their weight, historically we were able to manage ourselves, but we may need new written procedures now’

You have a manager problem as well as a colleague problem. Find a better job.

Of course, but the OP said her complaints are about a “number of newish people”. Not the odd person. It sounds like they haven’t been properly inducted or aren’t being managed if there are a group of them and they’re all new.

Well she has also has every right to be angry at the workshy messy ones. Surely competent adults should just get on with their jobs and be reasonably tidy and respectful of others without being specifically instructed so.

This.

This is not parallel or comparable to losing it at work.

Hi op,

I would say something like this.

I’m sorry if colleague felt that they were being picked on. It was not my attention to make them feel this way.
I’m finding that a lot of work is being neglected and this results in increased workload for myself and threatens our handover.
Previously when I have spoken to managers they have asked that I communicate this to the individual myself, stating we are mature enough to take onboard feedback. However, in this case such feedback clearly needs to go through the line of management, as I can see that constructive criticism has been interpreted negatively, and again this is not what I set out to achieve.
All I am interested in is being able to carry out my job efficiently, and to do this I need…

How helpful of you. We can only strive to live up to your shining example ✨

It sounds like you are picking on them though. It's not your place to have a moan at them about the kitchen. If they're not pulling their weight, involve managers. And stop "losing it" at people at work.

You lost my sympathy at 'lost it at work'

YABU. Be professional, do not lose temper etc at work.

You are human so you can’t always regulate your emotions perfectly. It’s done now. Just work with HR on resolving the matter and move on from it.

I don’t understand how in all your decades at work you’ve never developed the skills to deal with this kind of situation. You talk to the people in your team first and if this doesn’t work you take it to your line management. Is really basic stuff.

You do your own work as far as you can and if there’s some you can’t complete as a colleague any done their bit, then that’s what you communicate.

Stop doing their work and stop tidying up after them. It is management’s job to stop this, not yours. Sometimes things have to fail in order to get anything to happen. If a report doesn’t get finished just say, ‘I’m still waiting for Bob to finish his bit’. If the sink is full of cups and plates keep a clean set for yourself. Your manager isn’t reacting because you are doing his dirty work for him, but you don’t have the authority. Let it become your manager’s problem.

You are not their manager so ‘lean out’. Refer everything to management. Care less.

To be fair it does depend on the job, I can see that. I think you probably need to tell us in a general sense what line of work you’re in. Big difference between and office environment and something more hands on. Is there a safety risk to the project not being completed? I think you and colleague need to push back to the manager. This is what they get paid for.

What did 'losing it' look like?

Put simply it sounds like you need to make a counter complaint about work not being done and staff not cleaning up after themselves.

I say it every time but are you in a union? Get on to your rep ASAP.

I would say either

1. as PP suggests, document on an email at the start who is doing what. Get the manager to either set it or agree it
2. do the extra work but email manager to explain this
3. just do your share and just say no. If the project fails you can hold your head high then

i feel for you, it is rubbish picking up extra work.

I think you just have to ignore the kitchen. I know it’s horrible but picking up after the others is setting the expectation. Just deal with your own stuff and ask for a dishwasher.

I really feel for you. I think it will only change if other people see what you’re talking about.

Are you a clinician OP? I can see this happening in a nursing environment. Then you wouldn't have you own desk drawer for mug stashing and handovers would be absolutely crucial. Apologise for blowing your top but escalate and say their inaction is causing you to experience work-related stress.