Pulled up for “picking on someone at work”.

Management can't have it both ways. They either expect you and your colleagues to discuss issues and leave you to it or they manage.

You clearly need for management to manage the situation. Each and every time you go in and work has not been done by your work partner from the previous days then document it. Raise the issues with management-they can’t help or deal with it if you just always pick up the slack. Ask for a meeting and talk through the issues

YABU. This isn’t your issue to resolve with a quiet chat. This is a bigger problem and one that needs to be addressed by management. It should never have got to the point of you "losing it".

Is the issue that they work Monday-Wednesday and then you come in on Wednesday -Friday and nothing has been done so in order to do the project you and your colleagues have to do the whole project in 3 days instead of the 5 days it should take without getting into a sweat and panic

I would be asking why exactly they want these extra people as they are just adding to the work load because you have to waste your time cleaning up after them and impacting company profits by paying people to sit around and do nothing

Thing is none of us can tell whether the real story is:

They're not doing everything to your standards, but are doing it well enough and your behaviour to them is at best inappropriate and definitely could be construed as bullying.
Or
They're totally not doing their job right, and needed to be picked up on and your complaints were professionally and calmly put to them.

The truth probably is somewhere in the middle.
But on the basis you have described yourself as losing it, I'd suspect closer to the first.

As others have said, if it is that bad, then it will really have been noticed in your absence that things aren't being done.

This comes down to poor management then. Absolutely shouldn’t be leaving things to employees to sort out. Managers should manage, and that includes these sort of situations.

I suggest you offer your services as a mentor for a few weeks on a Monday or Tuesday.
Work the same days and show, by example and by explanation, what a good job entails.

Meet with management and propose the mentor strategy for all new employees until they are capable of understanding the requirements of the tasks.

Explain to management by offering constructive examples of exactly what is lacking, what is needed and how the situation could be improved. Also tell how hard it is to work with people who are not up to speed. Ask management for a way to communicate with managers before the office becomes unworkable. Remind management that you are paid to do XXX job not that and also Suzie, Bob and Netties jobs as well.

As you're being 'called in' to the meeting, the agenda will be set by your employers. Its purpose is to address the complaint about you, not to achieve the changes you wish to see, so you need to approach it first with an openess to hear what is said. Your primary aim should be to defend yourself against the allegations against you, so focus on the incident and be clear about what you said, your tone, where you were, if there were witnesses who could be supportive if the allegations are exaggerated. You can talk about your frustration with the untidy shared spaces and any impact their poor performance has on you as mitigation, but be prepared to explain why you didn't go via proper channels. If you have an anti bullying policy or dignity at work policy be familiar with it so you can defend yourself as well as possible if you feel you didn't breech it. If you're in a union give them a call. There's all sorts of potentially serious accusations that could be made against you when you 'lose it' with your colleagues.

We have always been told that we are mature enough to talk to our peers directly about issues, and not involve management.

a) that's Managementese for "we don't want to do the job for which we are paid more and given more authority and status and which is quite literally our job title"

b) clearly the other people are happy to involve management when it suits them.

This is really good.

This could have been wrote by me. Stressful time in my office, understaffed and I’m doing 80% of the administration. Colleague working alongside me arrives 15 mins late, leaves 15 mins early, chats to team members all day, plays on phone, shops online from work computer, goes over lunch time by 15/20 minutes every day, any task they do complete is always done incorrectly with errors and has to be re-done. I discovered they only completed 2 tasks the other day in an 8 hour shift (each task would have taken 3 maybe 4 minutes to complete) so 7 hours and 50 minutes spent at leisure. I brought this up to management and team leader overheard, waltzed in and said not colleagues fault, made a number of excuses and management looked uncomfortable then told me in private it’s not on and would be looked into, nothing got done. I had to then pick up all tasks and complete myself. Colleague been there 16 years btw.

I managed a team who were layabouts. Two in particular would come in late, lie on their timesheets, not do work and leave it for me to pick up. I was working with my manager to put them on performance improvement plans. They went to the CEO and cried and complained about bullying. Absolutely went to town on me and my boss and made us out to be awful and them to be utterly brilliant and virtuous. CEO sacked us.

It was a really shitty situation.

I settled out of court for unfair dismissal but they kept their jobs.

The lessons I learned:

1. Involve management
2. Some people are utter arseholes and you can't win

Hopefully yours won't be so bad. But id recommend look for a new role.

Since your conduct is apparently now under scrutiny I hope you're in a union.

As so often the answer lies in handling these things calmly and professionally, @DrBlackbird

It's perfectly true that nobody enjoys being pulled up on something, but that's life and fortunately protocols exist for those who can't handle this at all, though sadly it often involves them having to leave

Perhaps the real issue will be if the actual managers are capable of stepping up here, and if not I'd suggest OP look elsewhere

This.

Can't handovers be made more formal?

An email to say 20 cases came in this half of the week, we did 2, so 18 left for you (on top of the 20 that may come in during your half) copied into the manager.

You need to show how the work is being handed over with facts to back it up.

I'm also curious about what losing it means. Screaming, swearing, physical violence, below belt name-calling, stern yet professional feedback?

Urgh!

Supporting someone to cover themselves when they acted so unprofessionally at work? Distasteful.

OP, admit you shouldn't have lost it at work, say sorry, and ensure everyone involved it won't happen again (and don't let it).

Absolutely understand why this fills you with rage - do not understand how you “lost it” at work though. Walk away, cool down, remember you’re not the boss and it’s not your place to pull up your colleagues or lose it at them.

This is great advice :)

I'd suggest focusing on missed targets and work not done and ignoring unwashed coffee mugs if you're going to pursue this. Keep it serious and professional and follow established processes. Maybe make deadlines and expectations more ch clearer and document them. And stop picking up the slack.

In readiness, sit down and write out your complaints about their unprofessional behaviour - with the emphasis on the non-completion of work and impact on you and other colleagues. Has the in your head dual benefit of clarifying the problem to yourself and others, and being able to readily something in your defence. But be prepared to apologise for blowing up at people at work - that’s also unprofessional

Regardless of how long you have been working - to 'lose it' towards people is unprofessional and also can be classed as bullying in the workplace if you have 'lost it' with them, told them assertively (which someone could take as being aggressive) etc etc.

You don't have to tidy up after anyone. Just leave their stuff in the sink and just do your own.

I think that if there were formal complaints put in regarding your behaviour towards them then i would obviously take it on board. If there is a formal complaint, it will need to be investigated. The company will have to interview all parties and insurance will have to be informed.

Sounds like from the limited facts you said - that maybe they do feel like you are bullying them and that is not ok.

Sadly this is now an exercise in covering yourself and not the rights and wrongs of the situation.

I think you need a change of mindset before you go in. Whether your colleagues are lazy isn't the issue you are currently facing and just arguing that they are isn't likely to help you (however true it may be).

You need to start creating a trail. So when were you told to handle this yourselves? Can you think of the meeting, induction session, or even better email in which it was said? Write it down and date it.

When and how have you reported workload issues up the chain? Again email is good but if you can state I told x this at this time, write it down.

Have there been opportunities with your line managers to discuss the issues with the new team? Have issues been raised at meetings or catch ups?

How have you been supported to handle the increased expectations (which I'm hoping you have some record of pointing out).

What are the business critical failings/potential failings the current system is creating?

I would try and make it as impersonal as possible. If you go in with X is useless and Y is lazy then you are self supporting a bullying claim.

You really want to demonstrate that current processes are failing, you have flagged this, you have not had any support to deal with it despite repeated requests (which you can back up with the timeline you present).

It is a conundrum.

Absolutely everyone hates to be critiqued/criticised/told off or simply corrected and being told something is not appropriate for x ie not telling off, just telling. Everyone.

Even when it’s said calmly, neutrally and professionally. It seems that being told you’re not doing your job / well enough leaves people with feelings ranging from hurt or annoyed through to worthless. It must trigger feelings from childhood.

Yet, all too often people don’t carry their weight or need to be corrected. So what, as a colleague or manager, do you do?

Compounding the issue is the fact that those who don’t carry their weight tend to be the ones most sensitive to criticism!

Not to mention how research tells us that a majority of managers are incompetent and uncomfortable at having those ‘difficult conversations’.

What is the answer?