Work cf stories. Anyone else work cheeky fuckers?

There was a threshold for sick days, they took the maximum every year. When it changed to number of absences, their sick leave pattern changed too. That was just one example. They knew the HR policies by heart and took every scrap they could wing.

My dad told me that he went to work at a local authority in the early 1970s. The sick policy was one week of paid sick leave for every completed year of employment. His first year was completed, and the boss, (the Chief Finance Officer), dropped by his desk and said 'You've done a year, let me know when you want to take your week'. Dad said 'Er, you want to know when I'll be ill?' Boss said 'Well, kind of, everybody has their weeks'. One woman had accumulated 26 weeks, and she took them!

So, I have a hip conditionand I used to work in the contact centre of a large, multi national company in a mixed role ( mainly PA to the manager, property and some finance )
As my condition progressed I was in a lot of pain due to the chair/ desk setup. My line manager got Occupational Health involved and they assessed me for the Gvmt scheme ( Help to Work maybe ? It was a long time ago ) where the Government will pay for specific equipment to enable people to stay in employment if they have a disability or health problem.
So a specialist came to my work place came out to assess my work station, chair, access to toilets and kitchen ect. I was approved for an adjustable desk , moved to the my own office on the ground floor and measured for a bespoke chair with a much deeper seat and an integral leg rest for each leg. Perfect and a great example of Occupational Health really making a difference. Until ........I had a hospital appointment one morning and when I got to work my chair was missing and a bog standard chair was in its place. I rang around the various offices to track it down and the new Team Lead of the outbound team had it - and told me in no uncertain terms that he was keeping it !
Daft sod hadnt realised that I was a direct report to the Centre manager who backed me up immediately, but this CF still refused to give it back, happily he stated this on email. I sent his reply on to Occy Health, HR, my manager and the director that my manager reported to, then as I had no safe working area Occy Health directed me to leave work until my chair was returned.
Apparently the director called my manager who took our security guard up with him and physically removed the chair from him. I was told later that he had also been creaming off money from his staff incentives AND helping himself to other peoples lunches from the kitchen.
Happily I was there as note taker during the meeting in which he was told that he had failed his probation and why 😃

Sadly far too many.
As the then marketing manager of a small retail chain one supplier, who I got on with really well, called in the new year and asked if I'd enjoyed the single malt she'd left for me as a Christmas gift. I knew nothing about this. On checking with receptionist turns out twatty company owner had bagged all the gifts that came in for me - several bottles and boxes of chocs. When she found out she made sure I got another bottle and gave it to me in front of the twat.
That same Christmas the owner helped himself to a lot of stock to use as presents. But he hadn't checked them out and come stock take the shit hit the fan and bag searches were instigated. He was the ugliest human being I've ever encountered - a real nasty piece of goods.

Another was when I was goods-in admin working on the warehouse floor. A supplier offered to get all of goods-in a good quality branded fleece each - it could be bloody freezing. Only they were delivered to the office and the bitch who's FiL owned the place nabbed them and gave them to the office girls to give to their partners to 'do the gardening in'. Luckily the rep clocked what had happened and handed them to us personally next time.

Both millionaires, I am so so tempted to name the pair of them.

The worst one I remember was a partner in a law firm stealing someone's packed lunch from the fridge.

I just absolutely boggled at it and it stuck with me.

Nor me.

It definitely does seem to be the senior and better paid folk who are the most grabby for freebies! Since we started hybrid working, the office is like a ghost town on a Friday, so to encourage more people to come in management decided to provide free pastries on a Friday morning. It’s always the guys on six figure salaries hovering round the kitchen for ages before, and then piling their plates with 4 or 5 pastries when they arrive, whilst the lower paid admins who have to stay working at their desks until the pastries arrive end up with nothing!

If this was a business related event and within the last 10 years at least, then her claim isn't for fuel, it's a set amount per mile including wear and tear. If she was taking you she would have got an extra 5p per mile and she had to have a policy which included business mileage.
If you want to get any revenge, speak to your HR team or the Director with that responsibility.

Don't know how long ago this was, but now you'd get in much more trouble for not highlighting his behaviour.. Your boss should have been given the opportunity to tell the client it was bang out of order. We recently had the exact same thing happen except it wasn't the director of the client's company it was a person in procurement who was taken out to dinner. Our sales person informed our director and the client's employee lost their job when we spoke director to director. The client has remained woth us and we were told (unofficially) from the director, that they knew he did it, but had no proof, and had wanted to get rid of him before. He's now really happy with us, because we told the truth at the risk of loosing that contract. (Contract worth roughly 30 million for a 5 year service contract).

The only way to stop lunch stealers is to grind up some laxatives and conceal them in the food. The stealer with then be outed by the amount of toilet visits they make after the lunch break 🤣

Not tricky at all. She may do your PM review, however all you need to do is challenge that review if its bad, speak to your Union Rep. If they get involved and see that she gave you a bad review but can't proove why, then she is then in serious trouble. She would have to hvae tried to give you advice before giving you a bad review. That advice should be recorded. Get your union rep involved.

And he knew it was free @AzureAnt 😂

I bought a vegan pizza once it was inedible. Even my dog struggled but ate it anyway because she was a greedy devil 😅

Bloody hell, that's disgusting.

Don't do it ever again. You are nothing more than a doormat if you do it, and just because you care about the children and she is lay doesnt mean you do her work. Better that she is found out sooner rather than later, for the sake of the kids.

I have anaphylaxis and always bring my own lunch to work. I make really good salads with grilled chicken and things like toasted almonds, homemade dressings, nice avocado, watermelon, etc. They became legendary in my old workplace, and I had people asking for recipes. Not a problem at all. Sometimes my lunch just went missing. I couldn’t afford to buy it and there was nowhere nearby anyway. I put in a complaint with HR who advised that it was privacy issue to put cameras in the lunchroom but they sent out a bulletin stating that stealing food would be treated very seriously. It stopped for a while and then I noticed my lunches appeared to be picked at. The avocado was missing, or just seemed… different. I was texting on my phone when I wandered into the lunchroom to find my boss shoveling my salad into her mouth WITH HER GRUBBY FINGERS straight out of the fridge. She didn’t hear me coming so I switched to video and asked if she needed a fork. There was a bit of “Ummm, er… ah… I wasn’t… I thought it was….” and I said “Stealing my lunch, Lorraine? That’s classy….” (Fake name) “I thought it was…” I walked straight into HR with her following me and had a lovely raise and a lovely payout for staying quiet. I also had a mini fridge put under my desk to protect me from “cross contamination.”

Dp got a huge hamper last year but it was full of shit that we don't eat. Most of it we put in the trolley at the supermarket that goes to the food bank and we maybe ate one or two of the things in it. When he got his P11d, there was a charge for £250. He queried it with the management and was told it was the hamper because it was a benefit. He told them he never wanted it in the first place and they said too bad so he ended up paying tax on something we never wanted and never used!

A colleague of mine years ago who was supposed to work on print layouts spent an awful lot of time using her work computer (which I presume had better software than her personal one) to produce flyers and brochures for her sideline beauty business. The annoying thing was they let her get away with it as there was a relocation coming up about a year down the line, and they essentially decided it was easier to wait for her to take redundancy than it would be to force her out.

She wasn’t called Julie was she? I worked with one of these. Eventually she was “encouraged” to take voluntary redundancy. She did because she was near retirement and the thought of being redeployed to another role where she couldn’t take the piss wasn’t something she relished.

It still pissed me off that she worked the way she did for over two decades then got a 30k+ pay off. 😡

CF of a colleague years ago. Fancied herself as a bit of a whisky connoisseur. When we went out for drinks on a Friday after work and we’re buying rounds, she’d have a glass of water for herself when it was her round and a double whisky when someone else was paying. A few of us noticed the pattern and decided we just wouldn’t ask her to participate in the round.

I have a solution to this, always lace your lunch with a double dose of hot pepper sauce & Pataks chilli pickle. I do this in the first few weeks whenever I start a new job. Only one person made the mistake of stealing my lunch and nobody dared follow them. After the message goes out that my lunch is super chilli hot, I revert back to boring branston pickle!

Used?
🤮🤮🤮

Leaving aside the moral aspect, I don't understand why anyone would want to steal home-made lunches - you have no real idea what might be in them, and what the person's food hygiene standards are like.

There's a high chance of leftovers being used, which mightn't have been stored very well. If you are making your own sandwiches, you don't use plastic gloves as a caterer would - you might not even wash your hands before putting them together.

It isn't like eating someone else's food at their home, where you at least have a rough idea of their cleanliness standards and a level of trust. The sandwiches sitting in the fridge might have been made by anyone!

Dh did a Christmas season at M&S. Only ever received one item of new uniform. Nothing else in the bag that was addressed to him.

I did a Christmas season at John Lewis.
Temporary staff were not invited to any Christmas functions and you weren’t even allowed the staff canteen Christmas lunch because apparently it had already been organised before you started there, in October.
They’re really tight.

Are you saying that only poor people are allowed to be left wing?

I worked in an office were lunches were being stolen. There were about 59 people working there, everyone knew everyone.

It started as stealing cans of pop, then sandwiches then anything and everything. Including leftovers brought in by a work colleague that was skint and could not replace it. The senior manager was appalled and threatened to call the police in. It lessened off but never truly stopped. I cannot understand the mentality of some people.