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AIBU?

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Original poster

To avoid your picture/ videos being taken.

70 replies

Aquarius1234 · 22/07/2024 14:24

I can't stand this new generation where even when you go out for a casual meal or a bloody walk and people start taking selfies/ videos.
I've never liked having my photo taken, but I now actively avoid it and it's a pain in the backside.
The worst thing is the selfies people do at concerts / theatres.
FfF just put the camera in the distance, I don't want to be part of your group photo!

OP posts:
ButWhatAboutTheBees · 26/07/2024 18:15

AbraAbraCadabra · 26/07/2024 17:01

I agree with you OP. I was on the beach the other day and some fucker videoing themselves strolling along the beach walked directly past me as I was changing. I hate photos of myself at the best of times as I am not photogenic at all, let alone when I am in swimwear or getting changed on the beach. If I don't want to be in your photo or video I shouldn't have to be. And taking photos of videos of other people partially dressed is not ok.

Don't get changed on the beach where people can see you if you're worried about being seen partially dressed.

It's a very public area.

Noseyoldcow · 26/07/2024 17:47

I don't photograph well. Or maybe I am really that ugly in real life. I don't care much, but enough that I don't take selfies. But if you want my ugly mug in your carefully curated pictures, go ahead and feel free, I couldn't give a fig.

phoenixrosehere · 26/07/2024 17:32

Agree with you a bit.

My SIL (DH’s sister, generation older than me, think Gen X) is like this where she wants to take photos at the meal table when food arrives. I don’t want to have my photo taken and posted online as I’m about to eat. I ignore it and start eating, turn my face a bit so that I’m not fully seen.

When I take photos, I do my best to not get people in them if I can help it. I often get up before sunrise to take pictures and/or going to places during quiet times.

Themusicis0utside · 26/07/2024 17:32

edit

BeaRF75 · 26/07/2024 17:20

I just don't understand why people need / want pictures of themselves. I know what I look like, so why do I need a photo of me? At an event, I may take a few pics of the event itself, but then I stop as I want to enjoy the experience, see with my own eyes (not through a screen) and live in the moment. The best pictures are always the ones in our own heads and memories anyway!

bergamotorange · 26/07/2024 17:15

I agree with you to a considerable extent op. It is part of life now, but a draining part.

The correct etiquette is to ask people if they want to be in selfies/group pics. Background you should avoid children. If someone asks for their pic to be taken down, say yes.

MinniesCountdown · 26/07/2024 17:08

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AbraAbraCadabra · 26/07/2024 17:01

I agree with you OP. I was on the beach the other day and some fucker videoing themselves strolling along the beach walked directly past me as I was changing. I hate photos of myself at the best of times as I am not photogenic at all, let alone when I am in swimwear or getting changed on the beach. If I don't want to be in your photo or video I shouldn't have to be. And taking photos of videos of other people partially dressed is not ok.

MinniesCountdown · 26/07/2024 16:47

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Original poster
Aquarius1234 · 26/07/2024 16:15

I do normally move. But I had an example recently where I was in a photo even though I had said please don't take a pic of me.
Lack of respect when you know someone dislikes it.

OP posts:
ButWhatAboutTheBees · 26/07/2024 16:11

If someone is taking a photo and you don't want to be in it...
Move

So long as they aren't doing the Influencer "I own this place how dare anyone else be here?" thing, you're the one with the problem and you're the one who can move for 2 seconds.

Tagyoureit · 26/07/2024 16:04

ButWhatAboutTheBees · 22/07/2024 14:42

Long before smart phones, CCTV was recording you anyway...

And photos on film cameras would also catch people in the background

But cctv isn't displayed on sm all the time!

I think I'd rather not have my double chin in the background of people's photos so freely displayed when I try so hard not to display it myself! In fact, looking through my photos the other day to delete some, you'd think I didn't exist!

Original poster
Aquarius1234 · 26/07/2024 16:01

the80sweregreat · 26/07/2024 15:40

I hate having my photo taken.
I always look awful
It's a horrible trend , but luckily I don't go out much so I can avoid a lot of this.

Yes indeed but you shouldn't have to avoid going out and doing fun things was my main point.
Just trying to think when the turning the phone camera the other way started. My god its annoying to witness.
I wonder when this trend will die????
It very much seems like there is a chunk of people that book things just for the photo /bucket list.

OP posts:
the80sweregreat · 26/07/2024 15:40

I hate having my photo taken.
I always look awful
It's a horrible trend , but luckily I don't go out much so I can avoid a lot of this.

Shockvote · 26/07/2024 15:38

Aquarius1234 · 26/07/2024 12:26

Its strange that in society its somehow weird to not be keen on having your picture taken, or being in some randoms selfies walking down city streets or any tourist area, busy pubs, theaters, music venues etc

Or dating someone new, do I need to send several pictures and have selfies together to be seen as normal. This is why I am single..
Why do I need to be like everyone else though?

On your last paragraph, I don’t think DH and I have been in a single selfie in the 8 years we’ve been together, and I think we’ve maybe been in fewer than ten other photos together (excluding wedding photos).

You don’t have to do stuff just because other people do it.

Original poster
Aquarius1234 · 26/07/2024 14:46

PissedOffNeighbour22 · 26/07/2024 14:30

I was at a London theatre to watch an Agatha Christie play a few weeks ago and had this issue there. It was just before the play came on and I suddenly became aware of being in someone's selfie. She was taking multiple photos of just her face in various poses, and due to the angle it was just her face with me staring over her shoulder. To make it worse I looked absolutely dreadful and I can only imagine the comments if that got posted to social media (she was young, beautiful and very photogenic - I'm very much not).

If she'd just swapped seats with her partner, no one would have been affected as he was next to the wall. I just find it so rude to do when you're in close quarters with people.

OP, I'd never even taken a selfie until I joined online dating. My DP also took his first one for the same reason. I avoid group photos so didn't have any and my DP only had photos taken during band rehearsals. The only photos I had of myself were from my first wedding, not really the sort of thing to post on a dating site!

Yeh its the annoying way people take selfies now.
I can only suggest for next time, you should just tap them on the shoulder and say excuse me, I am in the way of your photos!! Please move a little.
Perhaps in theatre there should be rows for selfie photos. Normally a theatre is the one place phones should be turned off.
Buts its now a thing to take pictures before a play/show starts and they are now allowing at the end.
Take a picture of the set or actors if you must but selfies in your seat is so irritating.

OP posts:
PissedOffNeighbour22 · 26/07/2024 14:30

I was at a London theatre to watch an Agatha Christie play a few weeks ago and had this issue there. It was just before the play came on and I suddenly became aware of being in someone's selfie. She was taking multiple photos of just her face in various poses, and due to the angle it was just her face with me staring over her shoulder. To make it worse I looked absolutely dreadful and I can only imagine the comments if that got posted to social media (she was young, beautiful and very photogenic - I'm very much not).

If she'd just swapped seats with her partner, no one would have been affected as he was next to the wall. I just find it so rude to do when you're in close quarters with people.

OP, I'd never even taken a selfie until I joined online dating. My DP also took his first one for the same reason. I avoid group photos so didn't have any and my DP only had photos taken during band rehearsals. The only photos I had of myself were from my first wedding, not really the sort of thing to post on a dating site!

Epicaricacy · 26/07/2024 14:28

But anyone should have the right to go out for the evening not dressed up and not be in a photo! ( just in normal clothes) not posing for pictures.

that doesn't really make any sense. You are not in your private property, if you are happy to be in public dressed in a casual way, people see you, why does it matter if there's a photo.

MinniesCountdown · 26/07/2024 14:19

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ButWhatAboutTheBees · 26/07/2024 14:17

I went to the midnight screening of the new Deadpool film. Several of us were taking selfies in the screen before it started as an "I was there" type moment.

Other people were in the background because it's a public place, not public property but public, I didn't particularly WANT them there but it's the way it is

Most phones now will have an editing feature to remove other people because actually a lot of the time they aren't wanted in the photo

And group photos at events/clubs aren't new. They would be taken by a film camera and pinned to a noticeboard where randoms could see them

Original poster
Aquarius1234 · 26/07/2024 14:10

I think you secretly like taking pics of those that aren't picture people..

OP posts:
Original poster
Aquarius1234 · 26/07/2024 14:09

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I could say it seems like you like making people feel uncomfortable. Your controlling the camera and doing what you like with out any regard.

OP posts:
MinniesCountdown · 26/07/2024 14:05

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Original poster
Aquarius1234 · 26/07/2024 14:02

Come who prefers to go out at the weekend/ evening and not have their photo taken??

OP posts:
MinniesCountdown · 26/07/2024 13:58

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