Parents not watching their children at soft play centres.

I agree that dads doing this are the biggest issue in soft play.

Yes I'm the same, but then like I said that's very much the norm here. Soft play is for the kids, not the adults.

I have 3 young children - no I don't go into soft play and crawl about - I can't be in 3 places at once for one - you have 1 child so I can see why you might follow them around but most parents I know with more than 1 child don't do that

Yup. Used to work retail and had parents drop their young kids off in our store like we were a daycare centre. Inevitably when they returned a couple of hours later with shopping bags in hand, if you dared display an iota of judgement they'd give you a tirade of abuse.

We ended up just calling the police but it happened pretty much once per shift.

Nobody is paid enough to put up with a lot of parents, frankly. I wouldn't work in a soft play if it was a choice between that and being conscripted.

Absolutely agree and think soft plays should make this a rule and enforce it. Sick of bloody big brute dads running about with less special awareness than the kids.

@Rfthyhuj

From "encouraged" in my post, to "forced" in your reply. Excellent reading comprehension.

Fling yourself about an empty soft play all you like hen, that's not what I take issue with.

I watch my kids from the sidelines.

If I'm honest, I can't stand those parents who follow their kids around inside the soft play unless there's a very specific reason.

I see soft play as helping kids to become more independent and learning to play together, I get there's some little gits who do need better supervision but overall, parents should supervise and watch from the outside, not crawling around inside.

Also, keep the big kids out of the baby section!

None if the soft play is largely empty.

Bloody Hell, they can play with other kids at nursery and at parties, they don’t have to be forced to play with kids they don’t know when they would prefer to play with a willing adult.

what harm is there in adults going in?

If there are literally 3 children in the whole place, none.

It's still good to encourage them to play with other children too, regardless.

Largely empty, yes. During the day when the kids are at school the soft plays are very quiet. Ours is huge and there might be three or four pre schoolers in the whole big frame. If DN wants to play football or have a pirate ship ball shooting competition what harm is there in adults going in?

It’s also tremendous fun.

And forever it was thus.
There is ALWAYS at least one parent at soft play who lets their kid/kids run riot. Was happening in the 90s, when my kids were little in the 2000s and now. It's just part of the experience, along with the dirty ball pit and weak orange juice.
I always just saw it as part of the kids life learning experience. I did rejoice when mine outgrew it!

If a three or four year old who isn’t yet at school is at a soft play during the week when it’s quiet what harm is there in adults going into the soft play and playing with them?

Do you go to empty soft plays?

Back in the day kids played with other kids. It's good for them.

@YouJustDoYou . Taking over the ball pit with a baby and blocking older kids from entering must be quite common as I've seen it a few times too 😄.

Oh god, I don't miss soft play. The amount of either badly behaved kids not being watched or parents get arsey when someone tells their kids off was insane. One woman once left her BABY up the top of soft play whilst she sat with a group of mother's and an even younger baby out of sight at the bottom - this kid can't have been more than a year old and couldn't yet crawl. I was up there with my 18 months year old ds who'd literally just realised he could flap his hand, he flapped it causing air to drift near this baby and the baby started crying, the woman then came SCREAMING up at me about how nasty my ds was blah blah blah, and I was like, this lady is crazy if she thinks a gust of wind is nasty, just wait til she leaves the kid with some of the biters than often come in. One woman once also sat in the ball pit with her baby, at the bottom of the slide, and proceeded to shout at every single child to "stay AWAY from my BABY!" over and over and over. She was batshit.

The starting-point must surely be that not all adults can be in the frame with their child.

Or there will be no room for the children.

So expecting all adults to get in there and actively engage with their children is not only unrealistic but would probably put the whole soft play frame out-of-action for this kids.

My own take on it is as follows:

• U-18 months should be confined to the baby section.
• 18 months-3yrs - follow them round the big frame if you must, but it's on you to protect your little from the general fray, not for older children to moderate their play because there's a cute little toddler and a slow-moving elephant blocking their way.
• 3+ - they should know by now how to jostle and jump with the rest and, absent recklessness, unkindness or violence, should be left to get on with it.

Parents of 3+ should know roughly where there are, but when they get to 6/7 this is mostly knowing that they haven't in fact left the building. They should check in with them occasionally and address any misbehaviour that they witness or that is reported to them.

Obviously the situation is different if a child has SN and need a parent's support or has behavioural issues which mean closer supervision is required.

Most parents seem to know what their children can manage by themselves, with the exception of "weekend" dads ime who can tend to overdo it one way or the other. And all kids will have their moments, which is why I try to be tolerant. So I'll say "might you please remove your DD's teeth from my son's leg? I'm not sure he likes them there" rather than "STOP YOUR ##£&#@ BRAT BITING MY DARLING BOY OR I'LL SEND YOU BOTH INTO THE MIDDLE OF NEXT WEEK!!!" I find it's received a lot better.

What harm do adults in the soft play do? I always go in with my nephew because he wants me to. There is little fun in playing in a soft play alone.

@Callmemummynotmaaa

Brining the baby in arms to a scenario where I need to put them on a dirty toilet floor is riskier than leaving them alone in the buggy in the coffee area for two mins, within earshot.

I can't understand this at all. Why is a dirty toilet floor riskier than leaving your baby with complete strangers? How can you have one child in the toilet and simultaneously be within earshot to hear what's going on where you've left your baby in the noisy coffee area? And, if you've strapped the baby into their buggy, why can't they just come to the toilet with you and your toddler?

I try to go early to the softplays and quieter but with the school holidays its a nightmare.

Last week an child around eight was trying to stop my 1 year old from playing. Trying to slam her fingers in the doors of the wee play ktichen (thankfully not able to do that) and also pushing her. Obviously told him to stop and he started arguing with me. Then later on tried to trip her up. Dont know where his parents were. But he obviously knew he would get away with it.

I know he was older but surely you should be keeping an eye no matter the age.

Someone could walk off with your baby in seconds, you wouldn't hear that. Take the baby with you, strap them in and let them cry, hold them while you juggle the others but don't leave them and walk off to a toilet, you have no idea who is watching your baby

@Crystalbabe

What I didn’t like was witnessing on multiple occasions parents not watching their young children (toddlers/babies) and having no idea what they are getting up too.

100% agree.

Children that young should be in the small area where they can be supervised without their parents climbing all over the large frames where older children should be free to run about without stupid big men lumbering around.

If they can't, they shouldn't be there at all.

I think you've missed my point , parents have left their under 1 year old child alone with us in the baby section and just buggered off. There aren't strapped in and the parents are not within ear shot. We've been left to supervise a strangers baby , one time for over 30 minutes.

@MinniesCountdown

Could not disagree more. It depends entirely on the child.

DD1 is 3, regularly goes to massive soft plays and is absolutely fine. Doesn’t need supervising, I don’t need to see her. Has been like that since she was 2.

If there is a bit she can’t do then she just finds another way or another part to play in

As long as you trust she won't be a bother to herself or others then I don't care. It's adults running about after children in soft plays that I have issue with. I wouldn't take my nearly 3 year old to a huge soft play because I'd need to be in with him. We stick the the tiny soft play in our community centre for under 5s and he can do the big ones when he's older and can be left to his own devices while I supervise from outside.