1 child families + holidays + I don’t want to watch your kids

4 kids is the perfect team, they play pool volleyball together but then you have another kid wanting to circle in which means I have to referee one of my kids taking a turn out of their family game?

You mean in a hotel pool, on holiday, your children take over the pool to play volleyball?
Really?
And other children have to stay clear?

Unbelievable!!

It is uncomfortable, it is awkward,

Only if you make it so. Either ignore it, or tell them to go back to their families as your kids are having a break. Even better, empower your kids to do the same.

17 year old ds is perfectly capable of saying “ no, I only throw my siblings in the pool. Sorry” Grey rock. Or the younger ones. “It’s been lovely playing with you but we’d like to play on our own now”

Its only making you feel uncomfortable if you let it.

I’m ok with the idea of children playing together! I think in the pool situation I’d say to the other mum ‘I love that they’re all playing but my 2 eyes can only handle tracking my 4 kids in water and that’s exhausting enough, I’m a bit concerned that you might think I’m watching yours too- I can’t manage that sorry.’

@MNHQ, please explain why my post at 8.09am on Monday was deleted.

It was not a personal attack and I do not believe that it breached talk guidelines. Yes, I expressed anger at the OP's disgusting stereotyping of families with only children. I would not expect a parenting website of all things to censor people for calling out damaging and offensive stereotypes about certain types of family structure.

Please could you clarify why it is that my post was deleted whereas this horrible offensive thread has been left to stand? Does MNHQ really think that it's fine for people to promote nasty and baseless stereotypes about only child families but it's not OK for people to call them out on this crap?

Very disappointed in the poor judgment that you have shown in moderating this thread.

In conclusion, some people (kids and adults), are annoying on holiday.

I had to chuckle that you didn't read my post properly. I can relax because I have raised my family, not because of the number of kids I had. If I had one kid that was raised, I also get to relax.

As lovely as having young kids has been, I'm past that and can sit back and enjoy my coffee while those still in the trenches get to chase their kids to keep them safe.

I'm a single child single parent and a family of 4 kids would be exactly what we would avoid.

Yes the parent should still supervise but it's not unreasonable for a child to make friends and join in with others.

Sorry but I did have to chuckle at your comment that having a large family means you can relax a little.
If you say so...

I'm all for kids connecting and playing together but it is true that if another kid joins us, I then can't relax as much as I have to observe what dynamic the other child is bringing to the group. Some kids just aren't so easy or pleasant as just nicely fitting in. If I am there to have a nice time I am not going to want to deal with teaching someone else's child not to be disruptive or unkind.

I'm past those days where this is an issue. I just don't want to deal with kids who need active supervision anymore. I've raised a large family and now I get to relax a little. If someone's child wants my attention I don't ignore them, but I'm pretty cool and dismissive so as to be boring. I've had my time, now it's their parents' turn. Their time will come again.

So don’t watch other people’s kids then, simple problem with a simple solution. Stop whining about something that isn’t an issue.
Obviously if you happen to notice that they’re drowning in the pool it might be wise to intervene but other than that it’s really not your problem, or a problem at all in fact.

I find as mum of an only it’s us that get all the waifs and strays tagging along because we actively play with her and have lots of fun unlike the parents who have several so they could ‘entertain each other’ while the parents ignore them all…

@Bookmark1111 where ? I haven’t seen this at all. Actually read over and over how parents of multiples enjoy their family time , how their kids all get on and play together.
I haven’t read any comments from parents of multiples say they don’t engage with their kids or play with them or anything like that. I have three and love playing with them , we really enjoy our time and life altogether as 5. My kids love having extra kids to play so that would be a non issue but I do see from the ops side. Especially when the op mentioned her teenage son (who sounds great) playing with his siblings and the parents nodding that he could play with their dc when he didn’t want to !!! Which is absolutely fair enough .
I do get that it’s probably irritating and her experience is that it does happen a lot on holiday to them. Life is busy and I’m sure as a single mum the op is busy especially with 4 kids and maybe they just want that time for themselves. Re culture , I’m Irish and it’s the more the merrier in general but I won’t be responsible for other peoples kids . My sil does this a lot , wants my older kids to essentially “babysit” and watch her dcs at events and parties and my older kids don’t want to , they want to play football and enjoy themselves and that ok too. You just need to say it.

The bubble thing happened to me! A woman started blowing bubbles for her 2 kids in the playground (next to the sandpit by the way, so near a whole bunch of other children), and my toddler son wanted to pop them too. She was visibly cross. Um... If you want a private bubble sesh babe why didn't you wait until you could do it in your own garden? Why should I wrangle my kid away from the bubbles that are literally floating next to him just because they weren't "his" to pop? Silly cow.

My DD was desperate to find other children to play with on holiday, we were looking out for other onlies but there weren't many about unfortunately

We just got back from holiday and this happened to us. In general I have no issues with the kids playing with others but ds and dd1 were playing when a boy joined in who purposefully was excluding my dd1. She then got upset. I did tell him off all the while his mother was working on her tan without a care in the world. It is hard because dh will happily swing our kids about and others will latch on wanting the same but he simply wouldn't want to touch another person's child. My older two are at an age where they still need supervision and enjoy interacting with us, having another kid changes the dynamic and whether I like it or not I feel responsible for them. They require more supervision if another kid is present not less.

I did have a toddler keep trying to sit in my lap whilst on the flight back. She was cute but I wouldn't pick up and cuddle a child that I dont know. Two of my kids were asleep including my toddler around the same age. I also had dd1 sleeping with her head on my shoulder, she had been unwell whilst away. I told her loudly we needed to find her parents, her mum came up to me and said she wanted to play, fair enough but whilst my own toddler was sleeping I intended on doing the same. We had a 4 hour flight (early flight) plus a 3 hour car drive to get home and entertaining her kid wasn't my job. The child was not crying and both parents were present with no other kids on tow. I'm not cold-hearted but seriously. I wouldn't have let my own toddler do the same.

Hardly generalisations when it's what parents of multiples have been admitting to throughout the entire thread!

@Ereyraa not really - there are unsociable Scots too, of course.

@Bookmark1111 have you also read the sweeping generalisations about how parents of multiples don’t interact, engage or play with their kids as much and so children who have siblings flock to the Mary poppins mums of one child families 😂😂😂

Or how parents of multiples lack energy to engage with their kids so try and off-load them . There’s plenty of generalisations on this thread of children with siblings..

This. It makes me very said for my only child 9 year old, who always wants to make (& has made) friends on holiday. Said friends spend at least equal (if not more) time at our tent than at theirs. We would never leave her unsupervised at a pool (actually last year one family offered to watch her in the pool if we wanted but we said no). The other children she has befriended always seem happy to be friends with her. Sometimes there are kids who only want to play with siblings and she just doesn't play with those ones. More often she ends up in a big gang running around. It makes me feel very sad that the other parents are potentially sneering at her for not having siblings. Nasty.

And to add, last Friday we were out at our local cricket club where all the kids go to run around and play on a Friday. We were there with DD, her friend (also as it happens an only child), her friend's mum and our dog. Two siblings came up (parents nowhere in sight, both much younger - aged 5 and 6) and proceeded to spend the whole night hanging around us wanting to play with the girls and the dog and we ended up having to entertain them all night. We played hide and seek, blew bubbles, played football etc with them. No idea where their parents were. It's not just the sad lonely only children that do this.

4 kids is the perfect team, they play pool volleyball together but then you have another kid wanting to circle in which means I have to referee one of my kids taking a turn out of their family game
why would you do that? Just let them sort it out amongst them.

I’m interested in what kind of adults you’re trying to raise by making them believe others can’t enrich their lives? That only their siblings and immediate family are worth spending any time with?

Well I’m Scottish so there goes your theory

OP you have a CF parent issue.

It's not an only child issue.

May I suggest if you don't like your DC socialising get a private villa with a pool.