To stop breastfeeding when DD loves it . Mum guilt

Choose a time when you can focus on this (weekend/few days off work, ideally partner or other support around)

You pick times when you feed - say after dinner, 11pm, 3am, breakfast. Offer water and a cuddle outside this. Stick to it at least a week even if there are lots of protests. Then cut night feeds to one, then progressively drop others as far as you want. I wouldn't stop right away or you'll risk mastitis if nothing else.

Dd used to drive me nuts, saying no milk til after dinner etc used to help.

So much misinformation on this post. Its been disproven that breastfeeding can cause tooth decay. Also dummy is a replacement for breast not other way around.

Other than that its up to you. If you are ready it is ok to stop. I have read booby moon to my toddler for a month maybe and we stopped with no tears or anything.
You could also night wean only and replace it with water for example?

Kelly Mom is a good resource about breastfeeding, here is what I found on night weaning.
kellymom.com/ages/weaning/wean-how/weaning-night/

I love that grumpy bear suggestion- wish I had known that one! I night weaned both of mine at 15 months in similar circumstances to you OP, although kids always started the night in their own room, so that helped. We just sent in daddy! Had a few nights of tears and not much sleep (No daddy! Want mummmmmmyyyyy!) But it worked, and then I carried on day feeding until 2 and 3. Good luck!

. I think you can just night wean and carry on at other times? Look up Jay Gordon's method it's for cosleeping

I stopped at around 18 months by going cold turkey. I just explained that now he's a big boy, he has milk in a cup. You've done very well feeding for a year, time to reclaim your sleep!

I haven’t seen any of those posts but lots about being used as soother. Like I said in my ordinal post, it’s up to OP and she can stop any time she wishes, but she shouldn’t feel the need to stop because of false scaremongering comments re teeth. FWIW I used soother with one child and not with one so I’m not anti soothers, just anti women being made to feel they are doing something wrong by responding to their child.

Only happens with bottle feeding.

OP just start reducing the feeds, perhaps at night try water instead?

Plenty of people have issues with dummies too. Just look at all the “dummies are common/ chavy/ lazy parenting” comments on those posts.

It’s not about what other people do or don’t have issues with anyway, it’s OP’s opinion that matters.

I always recommend looking on social media Olivia Lactation Consultant and Lucy Webber Lactation Consultant. They are both professionals and have lots of useful and realistic advice about work / breastfeeding / possibly might weaning. More useful than random posts on here from. Breastfeeding and work is really difficult to balance. My now 21 month old took 3 months to settle at childcare. It was a rough time.

This is genius! Wish I’d had this info with my ds (although to be fair he always liked to keep me on my toes with no normal wake up times!).

OP, definitely don’t feel guilty. I fed my oldest till he was just under 2 and wish I’d stopped earlier tbh, I felt really tired all the time and was also back at work. You might find it works to do 5 pm, 7pm and morning feeds but not overnight. Offer cuddles and maybe water from a sippy cup or bottle instead.

The only thing I’d say is that I thought ds wasn’t really drinking much at age 2, my boobs never felt full. But it was hard going for a bit when we stopped with engorgement and I went into a really weird hormonal numbness/depression for a few weeks (I know it was hormonal as it was exactly the same feeling as when I took the Celeste pill!). I also had random bleeding despite not being due my period. So I’d try and cut out the night feeds then drop the others one by one if you can. Good luck, it’s such a hard decision to make.

The OP doesn’t want to be having to comfort her child with her breast for the vast majority of the night, that’s very apparent from her post.

Exactly - I mean a dummy is just a fake boob and no one has an issue with that (apart from dentists!)

breastfeeding is different than bottle feeding in this respect - nature really is amazing the way our bodies function. No need to worry about this although of course you can wean at any point you wish to but no need for dental reasons!

I did the grumpy-bear technique at that age. I had a gro clock thing that had a bear on it. I set it so it was 'awake' about 10 mins after DC would wake up for a feed. I explained that we can't have the milk until the bear is awake. It's not me making the rules here, it's the bloody bear! Bear would wake up, and baby gets a feed. The wake time got extended more and more. First few days we had tears, very upset about the fucking bear being such a complete cunt about it all, but lots of cuddles and by day 3-4 there was acceptance of the bear's shitty ways and by a week or so we got to not wanting milk. It didn't solve night waking though, but no more tears or wanting milk. DC still had evening and morning feeds though.

If you feel you're ready to stop, then I don't think you should feel guilty. My dd was 2 in March and still breastfeeds when she wakes up and before bed, and I am honestly so ready to stop now, I'm just trying to figure out how best to do it, so seeing some helpful advice on here is great! But definitely don't feel guilty, you've done amazing.

Hi,

Sounds perfectly normal, just a phrase, she's trying to connect due to missing you, it won't last forever, reasearch proves she will be getting double the nutrients and antibodies and antioxidants, and all the wonderful components of breastmilk not yet discovered, all adding in fighting those nursery bugs for quick recovery. Interesting fact is protein, fats and energy and all the good stuff in breastmilk (protective factors) doubles over the age of 1, so it's naturally to breastfeed until 2 years and beyond, as per WHO guidelines.

The teeth comments; thanks goodness some people have corrected that teeth rot doesn't happen with breastfeeding infants; 💯fact. So you're good here.

Just a thought; is she eating enough food in the day? On the days my 19 month old doesn't eat enough at nursery, she feeds loads in the night. I don't mind though. It doesn't last forever, they wean when they're ready. You're providing more than just calories. It's just a season in your life, enjoy it. Enjoy those snuggles and closeness, sleep is over-rated ;)

However, you do you. But I wouldn't rush her at the detriment to her emotional health.
Western society are only just clawing back our infant-feeding-relationship mistakes.

I’m sorry your experience left you poorly. My experience (x2) was different (not “easy” as you put it, but fine). I haven’t read the whole thread but it seems like most people are ok with weaning. Good thing this is a forum where we can all share our opinions/experiences and hopefully that helps OP.

Also all these 'human dummy' comments 🙃🙃 and so what if you are able to comfort your child? Give over loves.

@Lighttodark see this is what I mean about dangerous advice. I had mastitis when my child was 18 months and I was the porliest I've ever been in my entire life.
A friend of mine had mastitis when she went cold turkey with her baby at over 2 years and she ended up with sepsis.
If you follow the BF networks ( which I expect you don't from your post) you wound see that a lot of mastitis comes from weaning.

You absolutely can't just throw comments like that around. Mastitis is an extremely serious condition.

And no need to direct the OP to a group of people who specialise in weaning and provide support? Seriously 🙄
Some people find weaning easy, some don't. The OP is clearly struggling or researching to make this thread in the first place so no directing her to a place where she can ask questions and get answers from specialists is the right thing to advice.

As a mum who still breastfeeds her 3 year old to sleep; I'd stop now if you are in this position.

I am really struggling with weaning her and I'm shattered! She feeds throughout the night and day still a LOT.

Go for it if it'll help you! And well done for breastfeeding ♥️

Not sure what this is supposed to mean but it’s irrelevant to the OP’s question.

There are loads of other infant feeding chats if you want to do some breastfeeding bashing.

No, you are not being wrong to stop BF.

You also might find that if you night wean her, she will still nurse after work.

It's not reasonable to expect to nurse all night, it does affect your sleep. And fwiw, I think it also affects children's sleep, and sometimes their dental health as well.

At this stage the volume of milk is likely to be small so the risk of mastitis is lower. No need to over complicate it imo, you don’t need a hoard of experts to wean a baby off night feeds.

OP you could try slowly extending the duration of the night feed ‘ban’, if that helps/mastitis is a concern.

I night weaned in the same circumstances at a similar age. DD continued to feed - but not during the night (exceptions made when poorly or upset) until she was about 2.5 years when we stopped.

Having one feed in these circumstances is fine. Feeding through the night substantially increases the risk of caries. I’ve breastfed for 5 years of my life. It’s rich in lactose, like all mills, and if they nurse all night when their teeth are through it can risk tooth decay. Otherwise it’s protective of teeth.