To feel like this about home interiors...

Stop focusing on the decor and think about you. Whatdo you love? What makes you happy? What would show someone that you live there?

For instance, I love reading and even though I mostly read on kindle, it doesn’t feel like home to me unless there are books in every room. For you it could be family, travel, hobbies, whatever. Then think about how these could filter into your room through photos or art work or colours etc. But start with you.

Could it be furniture placement? If the sofas are too far apart for conversation, it will never feel inviting.

Lots of books and pictures always help!

Redecorating doesn't help, because you are then "moving" into a completely new room.

Are you trying to be welcoming to you or to visitors?

If you want it to feel welcoming to you - What do you do in your house? What do you enjoy doing there? Design it around what you enjoy doing. Don't be too keen to tidy everything away in between. If you're never there, or you never have time to do anything you enjoy, then accept it's effectively just a hotel.

I think with blue (and I agree blue can be warm) you need some earthy warm colours to complement. This is a pub I went to recently and with ochre and red tones, along with gold/brass and wood, it looked really cosy! I would steer clear of greys and gloss white with blue.

I think your style sounds similar to modern Scandinavian, especially with your light blues / grey / white and modern light with high ceilings and coving.

Search for this on Pinterest and save any photos that appeal to you . Then once you have a few dozen, sit down and analyse what it is that appeals to you.

If that’s your style , you may need some texture , a few large plants , some large modern artwork and wood. A few large pictures / plants / table lamps is always better than a lot of small ones.

Texture can be easily added with throws, cushions and small rugs on chairs, perhaps some small new furniture items like side tables.

If your friends style is more boho then it’s never going to work for you, however lovely it is in her house.

I think this too - it is a feeling you get rather than decor

Perhaps the decor isn't the issue, but rather it's about how you use the house. Does it reflect the things that matter to you? If you cook are there shelves of cookery books and jars of wooden spoons and utensils on the window ledges? If you paint/write/draw is there a desk with your brushes and sketch books piled up? Do you have a cosy nook for reading or a space for your yoga?

If your home doesn't reflect the things you do and give you a spot to enjoy them it's never going to feel like home.

Could you start by thinking of the things you do, or what you'd like to do then create a setting for them - think about the practicalities of that, build up layers of things over time (a desk first, then find a photo frame to put on it, see a green you like on a paint chart one day and paint the wall behind the desk that colour the next day, add a vase - pick flowers from your garden for it - but over a year, not in one fell swoop). Think of colour as irrelevant and just buy, add or make things that you love - you'll develop a multilayered space of meaningful, useful and beautiful personal things and magically you have your home.

Warm woods, plants, small lamps (not wall lamps), and textures (throws, rugs etc) can make it feel cosy. Grey carpet is always going to be a bit of an issue.

have you used any of the visualisation apps? You can see what paint, flooring etc looks like in a particular room.

I did my living room in grey paint but it was the wrong choice. I love the colour but it looks all wrong in the room (as does my large white gloss TV cabinet). Other rooms look a lot better!

The sample photo you posted, I’m pretty sure that isn’t gloss white on the woodwork. It will be a satinwood or eggshell in an off white (looks similar to my woodwork which is all FB wimborne white). Gloss white is too harsh against anything really, even when I lived in an ultra modern home the woodwork wasn’t gloss painted.

I find houses that are often redecorated lack any sense of warmth or personal style. The cosiest of cottages tend to have cream walls repainted every twenty years or less. Just keep the house as it is and bung in nice paintings, lamps etc as and when you find them. You are probably trying too hard.

Art and accessories make such a difference.
You obviously like cool colours so buy art in those but with a pop of colour within that warms things up. Cushions are a great 'warmer' especially if you go down an unmatched route but with the same colourways.
I'd go warm pinks probably as your accent colour and build from there. TK Maxx is great for a selection of good quality cushions at reasonable prices.
As for accessories, go as big as you can.
A large vase looks better than 3 small ones. Less is more.
Buy your candles in colours instead of white or transparent glass.
A rug is also another possibility...with warmth in it.

Yes! I also agree with plants!

The photo you posted looks very cold and austere to me. Blue and grey and white can be very cold feeling and hard to get right. Pops of colour? Mustard maybe? I buy ornaments that mean something to me, somewhere I have travelled or something that resonates somehow. Lots of pictures and soft lighting helps

You need plants, lots of plants. And you don't mention the smells in your home or your friends, maybe she uses diffusers, candles? Has dogs.

I have a friend with the stinkiest doggy scruffy farmhouse, it literally smells like walking boots and I love it!! It smells like wet dog walks and fun and laughter and family and baking, she's always baked.

I literally couldn't tell you what colour her walls are.

Does the house feel better in summer? I have an ultra modern kitchen - so not cosy in winter but amazing at this time of year. Modern-ish living area too, but do have a fireplace so super cosy in winter.

I think it's very difficult to achieve a house that's both stylish and warm and welcoming as they're qualities that are often if not always opposing.

You definitely want it to be ever so slightly less than perfectly tidy so people feel they can relax. And the art and ornaments etc shouldn't match too perfectly either, because if they do they can look a bit like they've been chosen by an interior designer rather than accumulated by you.

I really shouldn't speak with any authority - not one of my stylish friends has ever complemented my decor. But I love my house so I don't care, and people do seem to be relaxed when they come which is more important to me. I can think of more than one house I'd be terrified to knock over my coffee in!

I don't think your colours are the issue, my house is mostly blues with "strong" neutrals. It's an old Victorian house but friends often say it's cosy. I think flooring plays a big part. I can't stand carpets (but we have lots of mud traipsed in and pets) but love cosy rugs like American braided rugs - they can bring a lot of warmth. Also too much of one thing and look messy or contrived.

I agree with asking your friend, she'll be flattered! A couple of friends have asked my advice and I love helping out (I always wanted to be an interior designer), it can often be a simple or cheap fix.

Agree on the cold colours. I love a blue but it needs something warm to contrast. How about an orange rug/sofa/cushions to complement the blue? Wood? Pictures on the walls?

Your sample photo is nice for a grand National Trust hall, but perhaps not for a homely relaxed feel...

I would go with either deep red or ochre tone accessories to warm up the shade of blue in that photo. Cushion covers or a rug in a persian rug style pattern. Add lots of plants and that would feel cosy and calming to me.

This is the answer

Have always thought traditional Welsh blankets give a lovely cosy feel.

https://www.felinfach.com/collections/welsh-blankets

I like your colours, OP. I think they can look cozy and inviting. There is no need not why they shouldn't be.

Without photos of your room and your friend's room it is impossible to know what is about her house you like so much.

But, for me, cozy means clean, not cluttered, but also no minimalist. Lot of books, pillows, blankets, furniture that complement each other but they do not match, it is a tricky balance and not everbody can do it.

Mabye you can ask your friend for an advice?

Agree with this, some people have the ability to make clutter look bohemian and stylish whereas in my home it just looks like clutter.