To think my DD17 is overthinking her bf's porn watching

You really think a parent should tell their child to be cool with porn otherwise they won't have a relationship?

Fucking hell.

Why, for being insecure?

Yes ethical outrage is very selective on mumsnet.

I’d be very proud of her.

This is a deranged point of view. Do you really think this? I'm anti porn. I'm not ashamed of my own body, and it's not because I feel jealous or insecure. I'm anti porn because pornography exploits women, and perpetuates a culture of oppression that normalises treating women as sexual objects who exist for the gratification of men.

Do you care about the exploitation of the children who mined the metals inside the device you're currently using to access Mumsnet? Do you think they had more or less choice to consent or not than an American adult living in los Angeles?

Once again, consider single women. They are allowed to experience pleasure too.

And ultimately some people enjoy the voyeuristic nature of watching other human beings having sex. Some like raunchy books...where they, you know, picture other human beings having sex...

She objects because 'she is insecure'. It's there in the op. Nothing 'high standards' about it.

She needs to work on her confidence and stop snooping on any boyfriend's history. It isn't a good start in the world of relationships is it.

Oh, I assumed you meant partner.

So you can't sort yourself out without porn? Deary me 🤣🤣🤣

@OptimismvsRealism "I don't believe you do either. I think you feel bad about your mum tum or whatever and weird at your partner enjoying someone else's body"

You keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better.

I'm a person who believes that people should be direct, candid, and truthful. Far too much harm has been caused by people distorting or twisting the truth.

What I said is a candid fact: the overwhelming majority of men look at pornography, and they look at pornography for the purposes of sexual arousal.

@OptimismvsRealism "! Why do you think they haven't consented? "

Oh,you sweet summer child....

I don't believe you do either. I think you feel bad about your mum tum or whatever and weird at your partner enjoying someone else's body. All industries involve power disparity.

For the love of absolute basic parenting skills, do not tell your DD this

Images and literature don't involve real women being fucked.

So only with a partner?

”And that a lot of (female) outrage about porn is rooted in insecurity rather than genuine moral outrage.”

Just checked in with my moral outrage and insecurity separately. I’m fairly fucking certain that moral outrage is where my (female) outrage is firmly rooted. I have a (male) inmate’s prison number and Victim Support on the call log as evidence to support where my (female) outrage is rooted. It’s not in Insecurity. By the way, who and what drives that insecurity?

I like how you put female in brackets- just to fucking sandbag your misogyny and sex-based targeting. Sweet!
Tell me what (male) outrage about porn looks like and what that’s rooted in.

Hello ? <insert echo here> Can anybody answer this with sincerity and integrity?

Crickets. As usual.

Porn has reached saturation levels. It’s far more extensive than ever and its existence, in its current iteration, encourages the ongoing coercion into appeasing men’s sexual ‘needs’, which can never be met, as proven by the armada of flaccid dicks so many of us end up contending with in our ‘satisfactory relationships’ thanks to the one, the only PORN! 🎉
Fuck that noise. Porn. When has it made sex for us women better?
When has it done right by women?

A sarcastic Thank You to all the sisters posting in support of misogyny under the banner of feminism. You’re not on the right side of history or women or OP’s DD. OP needs to do a little misogyny cleansing herself (or himself if he’s dad).

@OptimismvsRealism Do you really not care about the welfare of the women involved in the sex industry?

That’s a bit disingenuous, because they’re not literally watching women being exploited - that’s something that we know happens, but often it’s not what’s available on the screen. It’s in the industry, off screen, behind the scenes… And you know that.

And let’s be honest, there’s exploitation and child labour and death behind loads of the things we do and buy, that we can’t see. It’s part of food production, clothing, the wider entertainment industry…

Why do you think they haven't consented? Do you think Hollywood actresses haven't either? A movie free household?

Are you asking how women who don't watch porn orgasm?

I mean, a decent partner who knows what they are doing is a good starting point.

If a woman poses semi-naked or naked for a camera, is it not fair to say she has consented otherwise she would not have posed?

She sounds like a young soon-to-be woman with very high standards. I hope she always keeps them this high. Good on her!

@OptimismvsRealism I think it's hot to watch beautiful people too. But I care more about consent than I care about watching them.

All of this.