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Original poster

DH is eating cereal and I want to kill him

159 replies

annonymousse · 20/07/2024 10:51

Obviously this is lighthearted but jeez the crunching and slurping is unreal.

OP posts:
Devilsmommy · 20/07/2024 13:09

autienotnaughti · 20/07/2024 13:05

THIS!!!!😡 how hard is it to not bang the side of the bowl! And cutlery scraping

Show quote history

What gets me aswell is when they make a cup of tea and it's exactly the same clanging the spoon all around the cup😡 you don't need to make all that fucking racket to make a cup of tea 😤

autienotnaughti · 20/07/2024 13:05

Devilsmommy · 20/07/2024 11:01

I can't stand when they hit the sides of the bowl with the spoon eleventy million times. Clang, clang, clangety clang. Rage inducing🤬

THIS!!!!😡 how hard is it to not bang the side of the bowl! And cutlery scraping

Walkingtheplank · 20/07/2024 13:03

My 'D'H too. He's either crunching very loudly, making washing machine sounds or smacking his lips. He accompanies this with tapping the plate/bowl with spoon/knife about 15 times per mouthful.

Whilst it is definitely git worse recently I'm not putting the irritation down to my perimenopause as it drives my teenage son mad too - we can hear him from another room!

My parents always seem to have a radio blaring during mealtimes. I wonder if this is because one of them is a slurped - or perhaps they always knew my husband was a slurped and uts taken time for me to catch up.

Sunnydiary · 20/07/2024 12:56

Yet another reason to rejoice in my single status.

I used to have to make an excuse to leave the room when XH was eating anything really.

Ellie56 · 20/07/2024 12:54

annonymousse · 20/07/2024 10:51

Obviously this is lighthearted but jeez the crunching and slurping is unreal.

You have my sympathy OP. DH does the same. It drives me nuts.

Workaholic99 · 20/07/2024 12:54

annonymousse · 20/07/2024 10:51

Obviously this is lighthearted but jeez the crunching and slurping is unreal.

Omg! Same when my mother (only my mother bizarrely) eats apples I genuinely want to commit a heinous crime!

CrunchyCarrot · 20/07/2024 12:52

Well, based on a very recent spider thread, Eat The Bastard! 😅

IdrisElbow · 20/07/2024 12:52

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

SparklyEyes1 · 20/07/2024 12:50

@TutiFrutti yes, this too- I thought mine was the only one that does this. He's currently eating watermelon loudly and mmmming away. Drives me mad!

Rosscameasdoody · 20/07/2024 12:49

If the crunching is excessive are you sure he’s not eating a free gift in the cereal packet ?

ClassicBBQ · 20/07/2024 12:48

I feel your pain. DH is the loudest eater on the planet! I don't actually understand how someone can make so much noise when they eat. I'm sure it's a man thing aswell, because my male colleagues also can't keep their fucking mouths shut when they eat either 😡

earlymorningcurlewcall · 20/07/2024 12:48

YANBU!

Blarn · 20/07/2024 12:45

Is he the man who sat the oposite side, three desks away from me on Wednesday?

I get that an apple is crunchy, I actually don't mind the sound of someone wating an apple. I shouldn't be able to hear anyone eating a sandwich from ten feet away.

WeNeedBees · 20/07/2024 12:44

I have a visceral reaction to anyone eating cereal. I can’t be in the room at breakfast time.

Other eating sounds, general mouth noises really annoy me but for some reason cereal makes me disproportionately angry.

SoBloodyAwkward · 20/07/2024 12:44

Oh, and slightly off topic, but people who scrape the toast instead of spreading the butter on. Dh will make such a dramatic scene, toast crumbs all over, and just scrape the butter on, and then the bits get all in with the butter. The scraping noises, why can't he just spread it on, takes seconds!

SauvignonBlonk · 20/07/2024 12:42

Can sympathise OP. Just one of the eleventy billion reasons my ex no longer lives in my house. He used to have to turn his fork at an angle to get the ‘far too big for one mouthful’ amount of food in his mouth. He’d then smack his lips all over the place while he was chewing.
He also used to drink far too much cherry brandy, rinsing it round his mouth before swallowing.
Surprisingly, after 8 years, he’s still single!!! 🤣

SAbs86 · 20/07/2024 12:41

I get uncontrollable rage when people eat loudly / slurp loudly / crunch loudly. As I type I'm sitting on a train and there's a lady loudly eating an apple 😩😩😩

SoBloodyAwkward · 20/07/2024 12:41

Oh god I'm with you op. Dh somehow manages to leave bits of granola on the floor, as he eats it standing up in the kitchen. I keep standing on it, ow, then realise what it is! He denies all knowledge of it, and is a repeat offender! The clanging of the spoon as well; I'm surprised my bowls aren't cracked!

Changingplace · 20/07/2024 12:34

Iamiams · 20/07/2024 11:47

A past acquaintance used to stuff his mouth with food like a hamster, chew noisily, then swallow three times. There was so much in his mouth he couldn’t even swallow the whole lot. Three times it took. Always three. Then he’d start piling the food in again.

I feel stabby just reading that, gross.

Demonhunter · 20/07/2024 12:33

As someone on the She's Eaten Him thread would advise, ETB.

PerfectTravelTote · 20/07/2024 12:33

Is he banging the spoon off the bowl too? 😡

ssd · 20/07/2024 12:29

Its the clatter of the spoon against the bowl that drives me nuts

(Of course we are all perfect Grin)

ThePoshUns · 20/07/2024 12:24

I have found my people.
The sound of my husband eating crisps makes me murderous.
The whole drama of it.

Needmorelego · 20/07/2024 12:21

Have you ever watched Everybody Loves Raymond?
There's a whole thing about the brother having this habit of touching his chin with the spoon every time before he eats the cereal.
Apparently it was something the actor did so they wrote it in 😂

TutiFrutti · 20/07/2024 12:05

Add in the low level "mmmMMmm" muttering to the mix and I'm out of there.
Our patio is quite new but the stair carpet looks a bit loose....

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