Husband over-egging pain

YABU your comparing two different situations, you can’t possibly know what his pain is like

You're reacting exactly how my MIL did after my c-section shortly before she was told to pack her bags and get out

YABU OP

But my DH had a vasectomy and he was the 1 in 100 men (whatever the stats were at the time) who had an adverse reaction. His balls swelled and looked like avocados...so swollen and black. It was awful and they took a long time to go back to normal 🫣 But it was when he said 'oh god, you've got NO IDEA how much pain I'm in'. I did side eye him a bit having previously pushed out two 10lb babies on just gas & air 🤣🤣 ok love...ive got no idea!!

DH was back in work a couple of days after his vasectomy, but for a good week or two it was painful/uncomfortable to pick ds up, it must be the way the muscles pull or something. He didn't make a big fuss over the procedure and got on with other things so I have no reason to disbelieve that lifting hurt.

It's not even been 48 hours give him a break

You are being extremely unreasonable. It's his private parts that are in pain, not yours. You may have physically given birth so you know that type of pain but you don't know the pain of a vasectomy.

Why do you ''lack sympathy in general?'' Does he mistreat you/kids in some way?

Even if he does, he's had a medical thing done less that 48 hours earlier, I'm no medic/not trained but I know he'd still be in a lot of pain for several days after having it done.

Show your horrible post to you husband and all the replies, let him know there's loads of women on here wishing him well and sympathizing for having you as a wife.

Good luck in making a a speedy recovery, hubby!

You, wife, need to grow up fast.

You sound wonderful....

I feel for your husband 😂

YABVU.

Anyone needs time to recover after surgery. It’s impossible to compare his pain now with how you felt about childbirth! They are different experiences in the first place and then different people experience them differently! I certainly couldn’t have done anything a day after childbirth. Show a little more sympathy and kindness.

Pretty obvious you're unreasonable in context of this one incident.

So tell us the backstory of why you don't have sympathy for him or dont like him.

Oh give over. Maybe he is trying it on a bit, maybe he’s just exaggerating a wee bit, maybe it’s genuinely very painful, you don’t know and won’t ever know. It’s only been a day or two. If he’s still like this in a couple of weeks, then have a word, but otherwise you’re being a bit.. martyrish and somewhat controlling.

It’s been barely 48 hours. Some men would be completely fine by now, some aren’t.

As someone who had a very painful recovery from surgery a lot of other people bounce back from and got heartily sick of the “but I was in Tesco the day after I had mine” stories, I am on your husband’s side.

No doubt there’s a backstory as to why you don’t seem to actually like him very much?

I think it's very unattractive to lack sympathy towards your partner in general.

Two wrongs don't make a right. If you love someone, why would you want them to suffer just because you did? It's a horrible attitude to have.

All the men I know that have had this say they felt they'd been kicked in the balls really hard for several days at least afterwards, so I'm not surprised he's in pain. I'd be cutting him a bit of slack, in all honesty.

YABVU

How do you know how much it hurts him? you don't have a clue - and picking up your child after childbirth is exactly what female bodies are designed to do. We are not designed to have knives slicing away at our insides

YABVU. You have no idea what his level of pain is and he’s had a medical procedure less than 48 hours ago in literally the most sensitive area of his entire body. You also say you ‘lack sympathy towards him in general’ which is also unreasonable.