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Original poster

Is it safe for my 7 month old to sleep in the cot?

123 replies

YourZingyLilacDreamer · 18/07/2024 23:28

I'm having an awful time with baby and sleep.

If I put him in the cot and I stay in the bed, is it safe? I will be on the opposite side with a single duvet.

There is a gap where the two mattresses meet where the Ikea cot bar is. Can he suffocate? He can roll and has a snuze alarm on.

I'm worried sick but I need a way to transfer him back to the cot or co sleep safely

Is it safe for my 7 month old to sleep in the cot?
OP posts:
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Original poster
YourZingyLilacDreamer · 19/07/2024 00:02

MixedCouple2 · 18/07/2024 23:56

Follow safe sleeping guidelines - Lullaby trust. If you drink or a smoke don't bedshare / cosleep. No loose bedding near baby.
Try and get the levels equal with no gap. Anyone able to help make the adjustment at home? Any handy men about?

My DS slept next to me once he started to roll and was no longer in his Moses basket. I was / am a super light sleeprt so we would nurse and sleep and it was very safe. I run hot so never had a duvet over me. Wore layers and remover layers.

My DS needed us until he could sleep through the night alone at 22months. Cry it out and "sleep training" is not scientifically backed. I follow some child experts and psychologists on the matter. It is cruel and doesn't work. Your baby is 7 months they still need thwir carers close day and night. Some children just need that extra support. Just like children being able to stay dry at night it is a hormones and takes some kids up until age 6/7! You Sony torture a chils to teach them to stay dry at night so why are we torturing babies to sleep alone.
How cruel.

Edited

They are level just the integrity of the cot will be compromised as the corners would need to be removed etc.

Not sure if there are others like this? I don't want to spend £300 on the next to me

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Original poster
YourZingyLilacDreamer · 19/07/2024 00:03

Gettoachiro · 19/07/2024 00:00

I know you said you have tried everything but maybe try a sleep sack if you havent already? But sleep with the sack first yourself (when you can anyway given what's happening) or do whatever to get your 'smell' (for want of a better word) on it.

Best of luck whatever though.

I wore his baby grow for the whole day, no difference. I also had my sister look after him once and she said he would stop crying if she put him on the bed.

OP posts:
Overthebow · 19/07/2024 00:05

YourZingyLilacDreamer · 19/07/2024 00:02

They are level just the integrity of the cot will be compromised as the corners would need to be removed etc.

Not sure if there are others like this? I don't want to spend £300 on the next to me

Show quote history

You could get a second hand one and buy a new mattress for it, would be cheaper.

Original poster
YourZingyLilacDreamer · 19/07/2024 00:06

Overthebow · 19/07/2024 00:05

You could get a second hand one and buy a new mattress for it, would be cheaper.

Show quote history

No thanks. The mattress are expensive as well.

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KatiesMumWoof · 19/07/2024 00:07

@YourZingyLilacDreamer

You don't 'want' to spend the money.

Do you have the money or can you borrow it?

Frankly I can't think of anything I'd rather spend the money on than keeping my baby from dying 🙇🏻‍♀️

second hand with a new mattress?
borrow from a friend (with a new mattress?)

KatiesMumWoof · 19/07/2024 00:09

YourZingyLilacDreamer · 19/07/2024 00:06

No thanks. The mattress are expensive as well.

Show quote history

Why not a used one with a new mattress?

yes the mattresses aren't cheap, but bluntly, how much is your baby's life worth?

Original poster
YourZingyLilacDreamer · 19/07/2024 00:11

KatiesMumWoof · 19/07/2024 00:09

Why not a used one with a new mattress?

yes the mattresses aren't cheap, but bluntly, how much is your baby's life worth?

Show quote history

It's no different to what I'm doing now. There will be a gap between the cot and my mattress

OP posts:
TotHappy · 19/07/2024 00:19

At 7 months, i would sleep with her in my bed, with the duvet on us both and her head up near me on her own pillow. I still sleep like this now she's 17 months but I have the cot set up like you. She starts in it (her dad gets her down) but from the first night wake, she's in with me, I can very very rarely get her back in it. She sleeps with me, snuggled up.
It's not recommended. If she slipped under the duvet or pillow somehow and I didn't wake she could suffocate. I can only say its never happened and like a pp said, the risk of me falling down while carrying her/driving straight into oncoming traffic through sheer exhaustion and inattention felt greater.

I breastfeed on demand though and sleep lightly next to her. She's often in the crook of my arm so we're very attuned. I probably wouldn't do it if formula feeding or if I was a very heavy sleeper.

Original poster
YourZingyLilacDreamer · 19/07/2024 00:23

I don't BF

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SoddingSoda · 19/07/2024 00:36

KatiesMumWoof · 19/07/2024 00:09

Why not a used one with a new mattress?

yes the mattresses aren't cheap, but bluntly, how much is your baby's life worth?

Show quote history

This really isn’t helpful.

You can tell OP evidently loves her child and I’m sure if she had the money, she’d spend it, even just for a decent night sleep.

Original poster
YourZingyLilacDreamer · 19/07/2024 00:38

SoddingSoda · 19/07/2024 00:36

This really isn’t helpful.

You can tell OP evidently loves her child and I’m sure if she had the money, she’d spend it, even just for a decent night sleep.

Show quote history

No I wouldn't because they are less safe than what I have now. There is a gap and the baby can get access to a bed not on the ground. Fall risk etc

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SoddingSoda · 19/07/2024 00:38

I’m not sure if this has been suggested but can you remove your bed frame and you both sleep on your mattresses on the floor?

Original poster
YourZingyLilacDreamer · 19/07/2024 00:39

SoddingSoda · 19/07/2024 00:38

I’m not sure if this has been suggested but can you remove your bed frame and you both sleep on your mattresses on the floor?

That's the exact set up I have!

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Original poster
YourZingyLilacDreamer · 19/07/2024 00:40

Oh wait baby is out of his cot! Not a bad idea but I'm not sure it's safe as he would be sleeping on the floor at some point? Is carpet dangerous?

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SoddingSoda · 19/07/2024 00:40

Also I’m being really dim but where is the gap?? Even with the next to me there’s a slight gap as it’s a separate mattress to the bed.

Original poster
YourZingyLilacDreamer · 19/07/2024 00:41

SoddingSoda · 19/07/2024 00:40

Also I’m being really dim but where is the gap?? Even with the next to me there’s a slight gap as it’s a separate mattress to the bed.

The gap for my set up? Between the Ikea frame (it's now a toddler bed) and my mattress. I put up a pic earlier.

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Original poster
YourZingyLilacDreamer · 19/07/2024 00:43

Where my finger is

Is it safe for my 7 month old to sleep in the cot?
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Anothnamechang · 19/07/2024 00:43

Im sure a pool noodle or rolled up towels for the back part to push the mattress closer to yours and bridge the gap, make sure they’re under the sheet also. There’s a group on Facebook UK CoSleepers with great advice.

I also found this ☺️ doesn't look like you need the raisers etc but gives advice re pool noodle or towels.

www.instagram.com/reel/CwbN1q8taFd/?igsh=MXFwb3NidTJiejhxZw==

SoddingSoda · 19/07/2024 00:49

When they say gaps it’s gaps they can get trapped in. How likely would it be for that gap to get bigger (I’d say highly unlikely).

AppleJuiceorBeer · 19/07/2024 00:54

I’m not sure if this has been suggested but can you remove your bed frame and you both sleep on your mattresses on the floor?

This was going to be my suggestion too, although tbh I'd just keep the baby with you on your mattress. Can you wear pyjamas and do without a duvet? If baby falls off the mattress onto carpet they will cry but they won't actually be hurt by it.

You really have my sympathy. Mine would never even go into the next to me crib. Life was hell untill I finally gave in to fully co sleeping.

Original poster
YourZingyLilacDreamer · 19/07/2024 00:57

SoddingSoda · 19/07/2024 00:49

When they say gaps it’s gaps they can get trapped in. How likely would it be for that gap to get bigger (I’d say highly unlikely).

Thought it was their face,?

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SoddingSoda · 19/07/2024 00:57

This is our set up. A normal cot with one side off against our bed.

For us it’s minimising risk. In an ideal world somebody would stay up watching her sleep ‘just in case’ but that’s not realistic.

She has to be able to see me or she gets upset. She’s also breast fed and regularly wakes for milk.

I was falling asleep sitting whilst nursing her which is much more dangerous. I was also worried about the risk of exhaustion on all of us.

For us this was the safest solution that worked for us. Yes she’s got a pillow, but that’s the only way she’ll sleep in there. Until recently we’d cover the pillow with the fitted sheet to prevent her putting it over herself.

Different note, we found the lights more distracting.

Is it safe for my 7 month old to sleep in the cot?
Original poster
YourZingyLilacDreamer · 19/07/2024 00:57

AppleJuiceorBeer · 19/07/2024 00:54

I’m not sure if this has been suggested but can you remove your bed frame and you both sleep on your mattresses on the floor?

This was going to be my suggestion too, although tbh I'd just keep the baby with you on your mattress. Can you wear pyjamas and do without a duvet? If baby falls off the mattress onto carpet they will cry but they won't actually be hurt by it.

You really have my sympathy. Mine would never even go into the next to me crib. Life was hell untill I finally gave in to fully co sleeping.

I find it hard to sleep so no cover makes it harder. I could get a sleep bag?

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Original poster
YourZingyLilacDreamer · 19/07/2024 00:59

Anothnamechang · 19/07/2024 00:43

Im sure a pool noodle or rolled up towels for the back part to push the mattress closer to yours and bridge the gap, make sure they’re under the sheet also. There’s a group on Facebook UK CoSleepers with great advice.

I also found this ☺️ doesn't look like you need the raisers etc but gives advice re pool noodle or towels.

www.instagram.com/reel/CwbN1q8taFd/?igsh=MXFwb3NidTJiejhxZw==

Thanks. Gap is in a different place so I'm not sure if it's safe as towel isn't breathable

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