To ask my husband not to nap while I'm working

Maybe his part time wage equals her full time wage 🤷‍♀️

I'm struggling to understand why a grown man who doesn't work full time needs a "nap" 🙄

Some people just need more sleep. I've only been working mornings the past few months and have a short sleep after lunch most days.

Perhaps he should go work full time so they could afford for the op to rent an office somewhere.

If he needs the OPs income then he needs to not be an arse and make it easier for her.

Nap on the sofa

I'm struggling to understand why a grown man who doesn't work full time needs a "nap" 🙄

Seeing that he is only working part time, they both need the finances the OP is bringing in.

The home is a home AND a work place now. And they both need it to work this way as they both are relying on the income.

If he is napping, he could nap on the sofa. For reasons the OP hasn't detailed but has stated, the only place she can work is the bedroom.

If they have no more space and he is only working part time then presumably they won't have the money to rent an office somewhere.

If it was a hobby I would agree with you but it's not. It's their livelihood.

Just counting up all the posts on here where a woman goes and sleeps in the room where her partner is working ..,, none, I think

I know.... but it's mumsnet where men are hated

I would hate to have someone using my bedroom as an office! Surely it's not the only place you can work from. What's your long term plan?

Bedrooms are for sleeping. A bed is far more comfortable and ergonomical than the sofa!

Sounds like he's fed up with this set up, especially if you're disruptive to sleep with early starts and late meetings.

What if he gets sick and needs to be in bed?

I don't you are being unreasonable here.

The bedroom sounds like the only place for privacy. If you were working in the living room, you would be even more in the way.

I'm not sure - whenever someone posts on here complaining that her DH is wfh and wants her to (for example) keep the children quiet, all the answers firmly say that it's a home first, and if he has an issue he needs to go back to the office.

I am 50/50.

It is his home and someone WFH shouldn't make it hard for other family members to use their own home in the way it was intended.

But having said that, why is he constantly napping? My DH does, but he does have a condition that flares up and feeling tired is part of the condition.

If he is not unwell, then I hope he has prepped dinner and sorted the laundry.

However, I would be annoyed if it was happening frequently. It is a bit rude and thoughtless of him.

No if the sexes were reversed I do not think the answer would be different. The situation is that the family finances require the OP’s WFH income. The dh is only working part time and is not doing childcare . OP does not have the option of moving to another room or out if the house.

The times MN have asked about the proper division of labour/recreation in the house is when the DH has the option to work out of the house, or in a study/bedroom but preferentially takes over the kitchen or living room and prevents the other members of the household from enjoying normal use of that space.

OP specifies that she uses the bedroom during the day when her dh should otherwise be working or could be napping elsewhere.

YABU

Its his home, his bed. You are in a bedroom, not an office.

Is it really anymore annoying than working in an office, with inane chat, tea slurping, phones going?

If you can’t cope, move elsewhere in the house. If you say there’s no space- then adjust your work station to fit. I don’t believe for a minute you wouldnt be able to come up with something.

No, it's their bedroom. WhAt if he wants to get changed? Or sort out his wardrobe. Or strip and remake the beds?

Get a wedge to shove under the door. I would find that really irritating. Imagine if he started snoring while you're on the phone!!

And if this were a man locking his wife out of the bedroom when she wanted a nap, he'd be told "it's a home, not an office! You can't lock her out of her own space, move your desk or put up with it". That's certainly the case any time a woman moans about a husband expecting to use the house as he wants for WFH.

Op is ASK him to use the sofa, but if he isn't actually disturbing you by snoring etc., and it isn't resentment that he's part time and sleeping when you're working full time, then yabu. If you resent hom working part time whilst you're full time, deal with that

Can he go in the bedroom to collect his stuff? Get changed? Look for something? Etc etc??

Can you talk to him in problem solving mode? IE “I need a space where during the working day I can keep the door closed and work undisturbed. What do you think of options x, y and z?”

You need to find another place to work. With a little ingenuity, I'm sure you could figure something out. They make desks that attach to a wall and fold down to stow away when not in use.

@pikkumyy77 it's absolutely NOT though .... 😂

WTF is the matter with him?
That's so far from reasonable behaviour I have no words.

You can't lock him out of his own bedroom surely.
Was this discussed when you took the job?

It's a potential breach of employer or client confidentiality for him to be in the space you work in while you're working there.

So the employer should provide a suitable workplace...

This is some grade A bullshit.