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Original poster

I want to be as tidy as my friend but it seems impossible!

85 replies

Mamabear04 · 17/07/2024 14:29

Just been round to my friend's house for a play date with the kids. We both have x2 young children under 5. Her house is spotless! No clutter, everything neat and tidy even the bath toys all ordered by colour or toy type. How is this even possible??? I don't have an untidy house but I feel my house is just cluttered with toys, x47488484949 kids drawings, piles of washing constantly on rotation, endless dishes on the rack. I clean all the time and try to keep things tidy but the clutter always wins. How is she doing this??? How can I make my house like this??? I try to put everything back in it's place but somehow with DH and the kids it's always so chaotic...

OP posts:
rainfordays · 17/07/2024 14:37

My friend's house is always spotless and she has two kids; it turns out she just asks the cleaner to come the morning of any visits she knows are planned, which is why the house always looks immaculate! On the first visit where the cleaner hadn't been that morning, her house looked normal with toys out and laundry out and clutter on surfaces. Not gonna lie, I was relieved to see her house isn't always perfect!

Menora · 17/07/2024 14:37

I was a bit like this I still am. I just dont really sit down in the evenings I kept on clearing up. I don’t tend to come on these threads to say things like this as it’s not fair on people who it doesn’t come naturally to, I just do it. I just clear up as I go along and I don’t mind doing it. I think you could learn it but it’s always hard to learn a new skill. I have plenty of other things I am terrible at so this isn’t a brag I would far rather have a fulfilling skill like an instrument, being able to draw, sing, speak loads of languages - I find all those things very hard!

dont compare. I am sure you have things that other people admire. Admiring someone’s skill to be tidy is all it is, don’t let it make you unhappy

Original poster
Mamabear04 · 17/07/2024 14:37

JudgeBurrito · 17/07/2024 14:34

Do you actually clean all the time? This is not a criticism, but I have a friend like this and her house is tidier than mine even though I don't have children. The reason is that if I get a spare hour in the middle of a busy week I'll leave the ironing/whatever other task and sit and watch TV to unwind. She'll do housework at the expense of self-care. While I'd love a spotless house, I really need my down time so will always prioritise that (as long as the house is at a certain standard of cleanliness obviously).

Yes, I clean all the time. Dust once a week, clean the floors daily, always make sure the kitchen is clean at the end of the day, bathrooms once a week...or maybe OP clean more???

OP posts:
GalileoHumpkins · 17/07/2024 14:36

Maybe she just has less 'stuff' than you?

Brandnewskytohangyourstarsupon · 17/07/2024 14:36

Or a cleaner?

Comparison is the thief of joy!

I have actually distanced myself from a friend who’s house is “perfect”, as are her clothes, hair, makeup, kids clothes, hair, her car etc etc because I feel so utterly uncomfortable and shit in every way when I’ve been with her.

Original poster
Mamabear04 · 17/07/2024 14:35

She doesn't have a cleaner and I've known her for years, her house is always like this. She once mentioned her DH thought she was a bit OTT with tidiness though now I think of it...

My DH very much pulls his weight with cleaning and tidying but we never manage for our house to look like hers! (It did pre kids!)

OP posts:
JudgeBurrito · 17/07/2024 14:34

Do you actually clean all the time? This is not a criticism, but I have a friend like this and her house is tidier than mine even though I don't have children. The reason is that if I get a spare hour in the middle of a busy week I'll leave the ironing/whatever other task and sit and watch TV to unwind. She'll do housework at the expense of self-care. While I'd love a spotless house, I really need my down time so will always prioritise that (as long as the house is at a certain standard of cleanliness obviously).

longdistanceclaraclara · 17/07/2024 14:33

The cleaner had just been?

BingoMarieHeeler · 17/07/2024 14:33

Have you been friends long or was this the first time you’ve been round hers? She probably made a special effort if so. I had a friend who turned out to be mad in many ways, fist sign was her getting up at 4am on the day of our visit to make an elaborate afternoon tea from scratch.

GrazingSheep · 17/07/2024 14:32

Maybe she has a husband who isn’t chaotic? Someone who does his share of household stuff?

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