Hi, this is going to get complicated, I'll try and be clear as possible. I've changed the names.
My mother has four siblings, two sisters and a younger brother. Ten years ago her younger sister, Alice, was diagnosed with a genetic health condition called haemochromatosis. It's also known as iron overload, your body stores up iron over time and if left untreated it can cause severe tissue damage and health complications. If the condition is diagnosed early enough it can be easily managed.
Well when Aunt Alice was diagnosed she told her middle son Martin and my other aunt Rosalind, but ordered them not to tell anyone else in the family, and they didn't. My aunt Rosalind got herself tested and tested positive, and she had her two daughters get test and they're both carriers of the disease. I don't know what my cousin Martin did, but presumably he tested negative as he didn't say anything to his ex wife regarding their children. Alice's husband Cecil did test negative, though that means their youngest son, David could still be a carrier. However they didn't tell David, even years later after he'd married and his wife was pregnant.
Fast forward to 2 years ago and Alice died. I didn't know the exact details of how she died, as in our family people don't like to communicate, but she was in extremely poor health in her final years. We would have visited her but it was pretty clear we weren't wanted. At her funeral my aunt Rosalind let slip to one of Alice's daughter-in-laws, Violet, that Alice had had a genetic condition. Violet pressed her for details and found out it was haemochromatosis. Violet thought the rest of the family should know, but didn't want to rock the boat so didn't tell us, but she did at least tell David who said he'd get tested. Violet's husband Miles (Alice's eldest son) died 10 years ago, but they have two daughters and Violet got them tested, one of them tested clear but the younger one tested positive for haemochromatosis, it transpires Violet's family also carries the gene. Violet did ask Rosalind if she'd told my mother but Rosalind wouldn't give her a straight answer.
At this point Violet decided that she didn't care about rocking the boat and that this was too important to keep quiet about any longer and she messaged me on WhatsApp two days ago and told me everything I've detailed above. That evening I contacted my cousin in Canada, my uncle's son, to warn him that they all needed to get tested for haemochromatosis, no one had told them anything either. I also contacted Martin's ex wife to check if the children had been tested, she didn't know anything about it but said she'd ask him.
With regards to my situation, I've been on the phone today trying to arrange tests for myself and my mother and my son. My mother is poor health right now on account of falling down and fracturing her hip two months ago, and since the accident her mental health has taken a severe downturn, she's very confused all the time and her memory is fragmented. I remember that according to Violet, Alice showed similar symptoms before she died. I am worried sick that my mother has haemochromatosis, and that it has gone untreated until now on account of my family's decision not to inform us about it. While I was trying to organise a blood test for her this morning I had a call from my mother's carer that she'd found my mother stuck in the bath unable to get out and had to call an ambulance. My mother is currently in hospital and I'm waiting to find out if she's being readmitted, when I talked to her on the phone she confused me with Alice and was convinced that the bath she'd been stuck in wasn't in her house. If my mother has haemochromatosis, and if she'd been diagnosed ten years ago, her condition could have been managed then and she wouldn't be in poor health now. Of course she might not have it, but given both her sisters tested positive it's a high possibility.
I am furious about all of this. The level of my fury hinges on our test results, if Mum doesn't have it I'm still angry that Alice, Cecil, Rosalind and Martin kept the rest of the family in the dark about something so important, if she does have it then they have directly caused her harm.
Besides needing to vent, I also wanted to ask if anyone knows if it's possible to take legal action against them, for having withheld such vital information from us for 10 years? I'm not interested in getting money from them, I just want them held to account. They've done a lot of horrible things to my mother over the years, especially Rosalind, but this one is really beyond the pale.