Work experience and DD with men

I presume he doesnt let her walk anywhere on her own, go on any school trips etc just in case...etc. He's at best ridiculous, and will ruin every chance she gets for an independent life if you let him.

Could he somehow 'introduce' himself during a drop off? So that it doesn't become a big deal, but he can see the set up for himself?

Oh god no please don't do this. How embarrassing for your DD. It's WORK experience. It's outside of school and meant to get teenagers ready for the working world. If he does this now then he's going to be doing it when she starts proper jobs at 16-17 and then probably won't stop...

Really struggling to understand what his problem is. He's a man isn't he? But he's saying all other men are predators? Just not him? Because the normal view is that most men AREN'T preying on 15 year old girls so why does he think differently?

Out of curiosity what sector does your DH work in?

I work in a massively male dominated environment and we've always had WE and apprentices here - male and female - and not once have we ever had an issue. Nor would it even cross our minds that anything like this would occur. The blokes here will always have a little joke / take the mickey out of the newbies but they know where to draw the line and ultimately always just take them under their wing and make sure they're ok. We've had some start who are so shy and quiet and then they end up being "one of the lads" by the time they're leaving and taking the piss out of the older blokes😂It does them the world of good to develop a thick skin and a healthy attitude to working alongside people of difference sexes, ages, ethnicities etc etc.

Definitely not rare, but it is a risk that has to be taken in the workplace. I think it's fine for dad to drop her off at WE once or twice.

I agree. Sexual harassment and grooming of teenaged girls is not that rare. It is a risk.

In this case it is a risk worth taking. She'll be in these situations soon enough. At least on this occasion she won't be alone with one man, and they are DBS checked, so that is some reassurance. This work experience is a great opportunity.

OP, I also agree that it could be helpful for you or your DH to drop DD off at her work experience, not only so he can suss out the situation but also to let the people there see that she has an involved and caring parent. This was recommended to me by a friend who had fostered many vulnerable teenaged girls. Predators are more likely to go after kids who are isolated than kids who have family keeping an eye out for them. She used to occasionally pick up her young people from work or drop them off, ring them sometimes at work, and so on. It sent the message: don't mess with this kid.

Totally agree... weird thing for someone who wasn't that way inclined to take from the situation. Either that or misogynistic religious vibes...

How can she go out into the working world, and be guaranteed there will be another woman present at all times?
This attitude is very worrying. So, the implications is her father is the only man that can be trusted, and she'll be assaulted the moment she's alone with any other male?
Your DH needs therapy. I genuinely hope he might consider it as it's a him problem.
I hope he sees sense. She should absolutely do the work placement.

This. He sounds a very controlling person, that needs to change or she will possibly end up seeking out similar in a future partner.. it's really unhealthy. I doubt these grown men are paedophiles in hiding.

What is it that worries him?

I don't agree that this is necessarily a controlling situation. He may be genuinely frightened for her.
I have been abused myself and I am terrified of my own DD being alone with men. I have learned to deal with the fear for her sake.

Finding out why your DH feels this way and addressing the issues he raises may be the best way to go.

It's a shame he feels like that, but also understandable knowing how men can behave towards women.
It's also a new step for DD to be taking. DH has got to adjust to DD growing up and away from him. DD is still 'only' 15!
Could he somehow 'introduce' himself during a drop off? So that it doesn't become a big deal, but he can see the set up for himself?
My dad was always around for me as a youngster, but rarely made a fuss but when he did, I listened. ie when I was 18/19 and finished work early evening but it was dark, he'd meet me to head home together. (I was equally used to doing solo long public bus journeys to and from school from 13 ....so not mollycoddled, just some extra caring in those circumstances).

#NotAllMen

This!

And also think about how limited her dreams will be if she's never allowed to work alone with a man. I know she's only 15 now but this has an impact on her.. she will end up doing work experience in a primary school whether she wants to or not. As that will have enough female staff for her never to have to be alone with a man. So here we go straight away being shepherded into a traditionally female, lower paid career... fine if its genuinely your dream. But this is so sad for her if its not. Its damaging in this way too. Its really controlling and harming her. Please don't let him behave like this.

Ask your DH why he thinks that. Is it because he would be dangerous around a young work experience girl?

And them tell him to get a grip and STFU

Wow this is so odd! I did work experience at a vets. No phones in those days. Went out on farm visits with a man. At no point did it even cross my mind to think anything of this! My parents just let me get on with it, dropped me off in the morning and got a lift back in the afternoon. Bizarre!

Your DH is being really odd. His attitude will be more damaging for your DD than being alone with two dbs checked guys working for a charity ffs.
It's your DH and that level of controlling I'd be scared of. This is not healthy. Accepting this level of control from a man in her life as though it were a type of love is going to really damage her. What do you think thus is all teaching her about how to interact abd relate to men? What do you think it's teaching her about her own judgement abd self esteem? Extremely unhealthy things. He's setting her up for abuse not protecting her from it.

OP, this is not normal at all, and I think you probably do realise this.
It sounds as if your daughter would benefit from the male contact tbh.

My daughter is also on work experience this week and I don’t think the checks are super extensive tbh. I think enough women know that in every situation there is a risk and I too would be cautious about my young daughter working only with men tbh. I don’t think that is an illogical fear however, it does need to balanced. It’s unlikely to be unsafe, but it’s more that possible unfortunately. Your H needs to better manage his feelings and not project that fear.

However, if he is more generally controlling, that is a bigger issue.

This x 100

OP, your husbands reaction isn't protective, it's controlling and creepy.

Are YOU afraid of him?
You say you will be blamed?

I am protective of my children as is my husband but this is a whole other level.

He needs telling firmly.

It isn't, but risk must be balanced. Unless of course you think running our society along Saudi lines is a good idea.

He needs to get used to the idea that she will soon be an adult and needs to have learned to cope in the normal adult world. You have taken all reasonable precautions by checking their background checks. His overprotectiveness is not good parenting. You should stand up to him, and let her know that it's a basically safe environment, she needs to accept and manage a minimal level of risk as an (almost) adult in order to have a normal life, and that you trust in her ability to make sensible judgements about people and situations.

This isn't a "leap". It's a reasonable train of thought.

Your husband is a walking red flag.

I think seeing as your DD has a dad with a very dodgy misogynistic outlook, it will be a good thing for her to spend time around more reasonable adult men.

This.

And also, what idea is she going to get of men in the workplace if this is how your husband is behaving at the mere mention of them?! That they're all creeps and perverts?! Hopefully she wants a career in hair and beauty or cake baking so she can avoid them completely 🙄

I've pretty much ONLY worked in male dominated environments for 20 years and not had one issue whatsoever. You learn to be thicker skinned, stand up for yourself more and not be offended by every little thing and take a joke more easily.

My first job when I left school was as at a scientific research company and - apart from one older woman in finance - I was the only female there. All the men were lovely and actually really protective of me as most of them had young daughters themselves. I remember once having problems with an ex boyfriend who kept turning up at my workplace and some of the men went out and had a "word" with him at lunch - never saw him again 😂