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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that dogs shouldn't be in toilets?

710 replies

LittlePearDrop · 13/07/2024 08:28

I'm currently camping.

There's signs on the toilet / shower block door clearly indicating "No Dogs". Not small signs. Very obvious.

Went for a shower first thing this morning and a woman brought a dog into the toilet next to me. It poked its head under the gap and had a sniff. I just ignored it.

Took my daughter an hour later and whilst I'm waiting for her, another woman brings another dog in. This time, thinking maybe she has missed the sign, I said, very politely and calmly "Oh it's no dogs in here".

She immediately became defensive, saying there's no one else to look after him (there's a fence outside she could have tied him to) and that he would "cry" if left outside. Errm, so what? Dogs whine. It's not the end of the world.

AIBU to think that if the signs say "no dogs" then it means "no dogs" and not, "Well ok your dog can come in because it might whine if left alone for a minute"?

OP posts:
HighHeelsOnCobblestones · 16/07/2024 15:38

parkrun500club · 16/07/2024 15:05

Why are these highly allergic dog phobic people at dog friendly campsites

Well this particular case is a camp site but what if I just want to go for a walk along the beach and then pop into the loo, and I can do neither because of off-lead dogs?

The reason people are scared of dogs is because there are too many out of control ones. If no dog ever bothered people, they wouldn't be scared of them.

Very few places are off limits to dogs now.

Indeed. By the logic of some on here, my allergic DS shouldn’t even be walking to school. After all, the street is dog friendly too. He’s only at risk if dogs aren’t being controlled or are being taken into places they’re not allowed.

Dog friendly doesn’t mean it’s a free for all. I took my whole family, including my dog allergic son, to a dog friendly outdoor event a few weeks ago. Shocking! Except the organisers had the rule that all dogs must be kept on leads at all times. Much like most dog friendly campsites. All the dog owners followed the rule and all the dog owners, non-dog owners, dog allergic (who knows, maybe even some dog phobic who were reassured that dogs would be on leads) had a great time. Many groups of people were easily accommodated.

Calliopespa · 16/07/2024 15:26

Greenlittecat · 16/07/2024 08:24

No one but you is describing sexualising animals 🤢

Well someone above said the dog wasn’t trying to look at op’s minge - which was frankly the high point of an otherwise niggling, fractious, miserable, unpleasant and totally unnecessary thread.

parkrun500club · 16/07/2024 15:05

Why are these highly allergic dog phobic people at dog friendly campsites

Well this particular case is a camp site but what if I just want to go for a walk along the beach and then pop into the loo, and I can do neither because of off-lead dogs?

The reason people are scared of dogs is because there are too many out of control ones. If no dog ever bothered people, they wouldn't be scared of them.

Very few places are off limits to dogs now.

Menopausemadness1 · 16/07/2024 14:05

Sethera · 13/07/2024 09:07

When we used to camp in a tent, we took our dog's crate with us (we'd crate trained him as a pup, and as an adult he still liked to sleep in the crate so we just left it there with the door permanently open). We closed the crate door at night so he wouldn't get out for a wander while we were sleeping, and put him in there for a short period if we needed to leave him alone for any other reason. He was fine with it. I wouldn't take a dog into public showers at a campsite because dogs are too messy.

For god sake don’t mention a crate! The doggie police will be after you! But same.. my doggies love their homes .. and we don’t even need to lock them.. it’s his safe space and bedroom! And the same for our other two.

Malahide · 16/07/2024 13:19

Greenlittecat · 16/07/2024 08:24

No one but you is describing sexualising animals 🤢

I’m afraid if that is what you perceive from a comment describing the complete opposite then that is your own comprehension problem

WiddlinDiddlin · 16/07/2024 13:15

VanillaImpulse · 16/07/2024 09:56

I'm just wondering where the dog goes when these single people travelling have a shower. They aren't exactly big so won't the dog get soaking wet? Then if they are outside the cubicle they could get stolen/bite people there. Genuine question.

Probably just ... don't have a shower. Just use wet-wipes and more deodorant, strip wash in their tent etc.

I doubt many single people are going away for more than a weekend, with a dog and no one else to help, and no bowl to wash in, flannel, water carrier etc.

VanillaImpulse · 16/07/2024 09:56

I'm just wondering where the dog goes when these single people travelling have a shower. They aren't exactly big so won't the dog get soaking wet? Then if they are outside the cubicle they could get stolen/bite people there. Genuine question.

Greenlittecat · 16/07/2024 08:24

Malahide · 16/07/2024 01:37

What you’re describing is the phenomenon of overly sexualised human bodies. Thankfully animals do not think in this way, nor do they care about what otherwise natural ‘bits’ they see. If you really think this is an issue then that’s a problem with your own perspective on life.

No one but you is describing sexualising animals 🤢

newnamethanks · 16/07/2024 06:57

I tied my dog up outside a local shop and came out minutes later to find a deranged stranger with his hands round my dogs throat, squeezing hard. He was crouched down doing this and I kicked him hard to make him let go. He fell to one side, I grabbed dog and left. Guy hobbled off in the other direction without saying a word. I couldn't leave my current dog outside anywhere, he'd scream and its utterly ear piercingly unbearable.-

WiddlinDiddlin · 16/07/2024 05:09

FinalCeleryScheme · 16/07/2024 01:26

Yeah. The harping on by dog owners about theft of their dogs (lol at roving gangs of mutt robbers - it’s like childish horror stories of the bogeyman) never answers why their dogs can’t be stolen from outside the cubicle.

So they must actually take them in. They shower and use the toilet with their dogs with them! That’s not just foul, it’s really fucking weird.

Emptying your bowels while lovingly stroking your dog? 🤮 🤮

Of course they take the dog IN the cubicle with them...

Half of them probably go to the toilet with the dog at home anyway - dogs love to follow their humans to the toilet because it is written in dog lore, that there exists a portal to another dimension and without supervision, humans may vanish down the swirly bowl...

Most folk I know (myself included) tend not to stroke the dog whilst on the lav... the dog just takes up a sort of sentry position, gazing at the door or the open doorway if you're that way inclined, ready to ward off infidels and sniper attacks.

Sadly (yes, really I am mildly disappointed by this) my dogs now believe I am capable of going to the loo by myself and can't be bothered to follow me up there. If infidels and snipers attack, I am stuffed.

FinalCeleryScheme · 16/07/2024 01:39

Malahide · 16/07/2024 01:37

What you’re describing is the phenomenon of overly sexualised human bodies. Thankfully animals do not think in this way, nor do they care about what otherwise natural ‘bits’ they see. If you really think this is an issue then that’s a problem with your own perspective on life.

No, that’s really really not what I’m describing. And it’s off-the-scale peculiar that you should think I am.

Malahide · 16/07/2024 01:37

FinalCeleryScheme · 16/07/2024 01:26

Yeah. The harping on by dog owners about theft of their dogs (lol at roving gangs of mutt robbers - it’s like childish horror stories of the bogeyman) never answers why their dogs can’t be stolen from outside the cubicle.

So they must actually take them in. They shower and use the toilet with their dogs with them! That’s not just foul, it’s really fucking weird.

Emptying your bowels while lovingly stroking your dog? 🤮 🤮

What you’re describing is the phenomenon of overly sexualised human bodies. Thankfully animals do not think in this way, nor do they care about what otherwise natural ‘bits’ they see. If you really think this is an issue then that’s a problem with your own perspective on life.

FinalCeleryScheme · 16/07/2024 01:26

VanillaImpulse · 16/07/2024 00:39

So dog owners who need a shower... do you take the dog in the cubicle with you and let them have a little shower too?
Or do you leave them outside the cubicle?
Also what do you do if you need a food shop?

Yeah. The harping on by dog owners about theft of their dogs (lol at roving gangs of mutt robbers - it’s like childish horror stories of the bogeyman) never answers why their dogs can’t be stolen from outside the cubicle.

So they must actually take them in. They shower and use the toilet with their dogs with them! That’s not just foul, it’s really fucking weird.

Emptying your bowels while lovingly stroking your dog? 🤮 🤮

sarahd29 · 16/07/2024 01:09

VanillaImpulse · 16/07/2024 00:39

So dog owners who need a shower... do you take the dog in the cubicle with you and let them have a little shower too?
Or do you leave them outside the cubicle?
Also what do you do if you need a food shop?

Camping showers are grim enough without the wet dog smell.

Any I've ever been on has outside taps to obtain water. One assumes it can be used for a dog.

Most people turn up in a car with enough equipment to start a small housing estate. Surely dog could just be left in car for a short while to accommodate all.

The real wild campers who rock up via foot with a backpack won't be worried about this scenario. They'll be wild camping and have less issues.

VanillaImpulse · 16/07/2024 00:39

So dog owners who need a shower... do you take the dog in the cubicle with you and let them have a little shower too?
Or do you leave them outside the cubicle?
Also what do you do if you need a food shop?

WiddlinDiddlin · 15/07/2024 23:14

YeOldeGreyhound · 15/07/2024 22:21

@PixieLaLar yes, you are right.
A dog in a bog cubicle is harmless. I wonder if the camp in this scenario (if it is real) had such a rule to mean no dogs being showered/cleaned there.
But theses threads attract the few who say that people who have dogs are somehow socially inept, or are some sad sacks that everyone hates so they have a dog to fill a gap. It is upsetting tbh.

Now you mention it... yes, it's a long old while since I went camping, but showers DID have 'no dogs' signs, to stop people washing off muddy dogs and clogging the drains up with dog hair in the process.

Calliopespa · 15/07/2024 22:25

PixieLaLar · 15/07/2024 21:56

There isn’t an actual issue that’s the joke of this thread. It’s all hypothetical what if someone was dog phobic or allergic (then they probably shouldn’t be at a bloody dog friendly camp site!)

OP got annoyed because a dogs snout sniffed under a toilet cubical next to her, confronted a different lone women with her dog minding her own business, then created a MN thread about it to froth up the other dog haters on here. It has brought out the worst that’s for sure.

Camping isn’t my thing but every dog friendly event, venue or holiday place I have been to has never had a “no dogs” sign on a public toilet. I think this is the fault of the camp site and not very practical.

I completely understand the dog owners assessing the situation presented - our main priority is to keep our dogs safe. Rational people understand it isn’t because we are ‘selfish entitled wankers who like to inflict our dogs on everyone else’ it’s simply because we care about our dogs and want to keep them safe.

Also to all the “you must obey the sign”posters every dog friendly holiday place I have been to actually states you must never leave your dog unattended, so tethering them up outside or leaving them alone in a tent would be “against the rules” which you seem to find so important in this scenario.

Yes I agree - firstly about the total non issue on this thread ( a nose under a door cannot be a proper issue); and secondly that the campsite is at fault for an ill-devised policy.

And I also agree: I’ve never seen a “ No Dogs in Bogs” sign before.

YeOldeGreyhound · 15/07/2024 22:21

@PixieLaLar yes, you are right.
A dog in a bog cubicle is harmless. I wonder if the camp in this scenario (if it is real) had such a rule to mean no dogs being showered/cleaned there.
But theses threads attract the few who say that people who have dogs are somehow socially inept, or are some sad sacks that everyone hates so they have a dog to fill a gap. It is upsetting tbh.

PixieLaLar · 15/07/2024 21:56

YeOldeGreyhound · 15/07/2024 21:28

If a sign says that dogs are not allowed in the toilets, then fair enough.

But I am not sure what the issue is with dogs in toilets anyway. I have had to take mine in the loo with me (in a park). She was in the cubicle with me and not bothering anyone.

There isn’t an actual issue that’s the joke of this thread. It’s all hypothetical what if someone was dog phobic or allergic (then they probably shouldn’t be at a bloody dog friendly camp site!)

OP got annoyed because a dogs snout sniffed under a toilet cubical next to her, confronted a different lone women with her dog minding her own business, then created a MN thread about it to froth up the other dog haters on here. It has brought out the worst that’s for sure.

Camping isn’t my thing but every dog friendly event, venue or holiday place I have been to has never had a “no dogs” sign on a public toilet. I think this is the fault of the camp site and not very practical.

I completely understand the dog owners assessing the situation presented - our main priority is to keep our dogs safe. Rational people understand it isn’t because we are ‘selfish entitled wankers who like to inflict our dogs on everyone else’ it’s simply because we care about our dogs and want to keep them safe.

Also to all the “you must obey the sign”posters every dog friendly holiday place I have been to actually states you must never leave your dog unattended, so tethering them up outside or leaving them alone in a tent would be “against the rules” which you seem to find so important in this scenario.

Julyshouldbesunny · 15/07/2024 21:37

My ddogs aren't defiant they just can't read the sign....

YeOldeGreyhound · 15/07/2024 21:28

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 15/07/2024 16:00

Yeah that’s not me though. I don’t hate dogs, I just don’t think they belong absolutely everywhere - there are some places that are and should be dog free - like the inside of toilets.

If a sign says that dogs are not allowed in the toilets, then fair enough.

But I am not sure what the issue is with dogs in toilets anyway. I have had to take mine in the loo with me (in a park). She was in the cubicle with me and not bothering anyone.

Werweisswohin · 15/07/2024 21:21

Malahide · 15/07/2024 20:05

The lady doth protest too much! You have no point when you neither own nor have any valid knowledge on dogs.

What a silly comment.

Malahide · 15/07/2024 20:05

Werweisswohin · 15/07/2024 14:26

Really?
I meant stop forcing YOUR point.

The lady doth protest too much! You have no point when you neither own nor have any valid knowledge on dogs.

Porridgeislife · 15/07/2024 17:45

bottomsup48 · 15/07/2024 17:36

@Porridgeislife I would 100% agree with you about off lead dogs running up to you. I hate seeing off lead dogs in public places, mine are always on lead and get very wound up when other dogs approaches us. There's no need for it, dogs can and should be kept on lead if they don't have 100% accurate recall.

However the incident the op describes is not that. A small dog stuck its snout under a toilet cubicle. I appreciate this could still be frightening for little children but it's not a safety issue or a hygiene issue. They cant get at you in a locked cubicle. And if it had been left outside alone your dc still would have had to pass it.

It was presumably a choice made in the absence of any other option rather than feckless dog owners letting their dogs off lead purely because they want to and don't care if they upset other people or other dogs.
I would encourage you to work on your dc fear of dogs, not because I'm entitled but because they are going to encounter them a lot in public (rightfully so, dog walkers have as much right as kids to be in parks etc) and perpetuating the fear won't do them any good long term.

It's a difficult situation - campsites allow dogs and encourage dog owners to visit, but being selective about where they can go on site does make life tricky for solo travellers.

As I said, we have done all the right things bar buying an actual dog.

I am not scared of dogs, and do nothing to perpetuate the fear. As a parent it’s hugely annoying as I’d prefer she was more relaxed. We grew up with a succession of GSD so big bouncy working dogs are my normal.

It doesn’t make it any easier to teach her that dogs aren’t scary when in this case she may be washing her hands and in comes a dog into an enclosed space where she would have nowhere to flee to.

Greenlittecat · 15/07/2024 17:37

sarahd29 · 15/07/2024 17:17

Can I just add as I was the poster who was young and inexperienced..

.the family had set their delicious picnic up in the dog walking part of the park. There were areas that said no dogs, dogs on leads and a part that was enclosed for dogs to free roam. They were in the free roam bit.

We were still mortified and I'm not excusing my dogs for their actions when they crashed the party but we weren't inexperienced enough to be in the wrong area.

Non dog owners can also be wrong too.

Yeah they were definitely in the wrong too for setting up the picnic there.

The thing is though, for every responsible dog owner like yourself, there are others who don't care or just shout "he's friendly" as they're bowling into a picnic/jumping on you etc.

I think parks (not including playparks) are fairgame to be honest, there aren't many dog-only places to allow your dog to roam free but the number of dogs who have no recall and are allowed to run up even to other dogs is high.