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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Teacher married to non teacher

537 replies

allsummereverysummer · 13/07/2024 07:42

It’s on my mind at the moment that I’m responsible for childcare every holiday until they are of an age they don’t really need it …

I know that’s obvious. I think it’s just I do the lions share of everything as it is. Feels like a long time to have them over the summer tbh.

OP posts:
distinctpossibility · 13/07/2024 07:51

All working parents (in a functional set up) use the vast majority of annual leave for childcare / to spend time with their children. For many, that's mostly solo with maybe a week overlapping with the other parent, paying £2k to go and get rained on somewhere different.

thehousewiththesagegreensofa · 13/07/2024 07:51

But most of us with that age children use our annual leave to look after our children and, if we want to use it for something else, then we pay for childcare.
When my DC were at nursery, two of her friends had teacher parents. One paid for term time only care and had her DC at home with her but the other paid for full time care and still sent her child for a couple of days a week so that she could have a break (which sometimes involved going out for lunch with a friend but other times involved planning for work or redecorating).

Original poster
allsummereverysummer · 13/07/2024 07:50

I think it’s because I’m finding parenting a bit tricky at the moment. I work 3 days a week but I don’t really enjoy my days off with them. It’s not them they are lovely kids. But it’s hard. During the holidays they’ll attend nursery 2 days a week. I’m dreading 3 days a week with them Blush but then I do get 2 days ‘off.’ Next year I won’t even get that.

OP posts:
mynameiscalypso · 13/07/2024 07:48

Most teachers I know have a mix of family holiday time and some childcare over the summer so they get a break.

HcbSS · 13/07/2024 07:47

Yes, in a nutshell.
My DH is a very dedicated teacher (think extra revision groups, HOD, does the school timetabling) and he loves the time in the holidays to really do more and have ‘boys time’.

Witchcraftandhokum · 13/07/2024 07:46

LaunchingTeabag
Another reason for teachers to moan

Were you just idly scrolling on MN waiting for a chance to have a go at teachers?

TheFallenMadonna · 13/07/2024 07:46

I think you need to even up term time expectations, which hopefully will then allow you to enjoy the holidays with your children. My DH did more than half of looking after the children when they were ill in term time, for example, because he could be more flexible than me.

whathasitgottodowiththepriceofoliveoil · 13/07/2024 07:46

Teachers on here always say how the holidays aren't really a break as they have so much work to do so I'd get your children into childcare if you're working.

If not you're saving a bomb and get that time with your kids others would love. Your partner can use their leave to cover some of the summer holidays too so there's both of you off.

BlueMum16 · 13/07/2024 07:45

Doesn't DP take annual leave?

AppleCream · 13/07/2024 07:45

YABU to resent that particular thing. Most working parents would kill to not have to worry about / pay for holiday childcare!

YANBU to feel pissed off if he's not pulling his weight more generally and to try and address this.

LaunchingTeabag · 13/07/2024 07:44

Another reason for teachers to moan

rubyslippers · 13/07/2024 07:43

So use some childcare 🤷

if both parents are working it is frustrating if all school hols are also their responsibility with no break

I wouldn’t hesitate to use clubs etc funds permitting