Teacher married to non teacher

I get it can be daunting, when they aren’t at nursery have a plan for the day, swimming classes etc. Is your DH taking a couple of weeks off during the summer?

Tbf I think it’s the fact that your DH is away during the week, the extra pair of hands in the morning or the evening can make a lot of difference. The age is difficult as well.

Quite a few counties have 3 month summer holidays, so it could be worse.

Yeah this!

Full time teachers yeah I guess this is a bit naff. I'm part time and absolutely love the holidays off with my kids, I feel so lucky I don't have to worry about childcare

Im just conscious for the next two years I won’t have a break at all

I just don’t really see how this is different from your DH!
Is your problem that he isn’t engaged when he isn’t at work? Because you can’t work a term time job part time and then hold it over his head that you do the childcare in the holidays & the 2 days a week when that’s because he’s working.

Apologies I read your post at 7:50 and presumed from that that you had two days over the holidays where they would be in nursery.

Why is it so hard having them? Challenging behaviour/not much to do near you/large age gap so hard to find something which suits both/overall level of exhaustion from taking more of the load rest of the year/something else?

When does DP take his leave? Are you going on holiday?
Get him to book some time off so you can do things as a family, and he can do a few days on his own with them while you have a break too

It does get easier as they get older, they have playdates with friends and you can chat to their parent or swap chipdcare days with them so you both get a bit of down time. There also cheap playschemes from reception/year 1 onwards.

I find it really wierd that so many parents "dread" a couple of days a week with their children.

You work PT term time only and get two days a week off with no kids. Yeah I'd say the bulk falls to you.

Exactly, like most we both work FT year round. We get maybe one or two days a year with them in childcare and us at home but that's it. That's working life with young DC.

We'll pay for camps then, like everybody else.

Everyone I know either splits their annual leave so their holidays are mainly spent solo parenting or else puts their child/ren into clubs.

I’m not sure of the age of your children but I do think holidays become easier as they are older. Given you mention nursery, I’m going to assume your children are still young and at a less dependent age.

Im just conscious for the next two years I won’t have a break at all and that’s a tad daunting! But I will only have one child at a time in term time so that’s good

why would it be 2 yrs without a break?

Im just conscious for the next two years I won’t have a break at all but most parents have their children when they're not working (ie use their annual leave to cover school holidays) so it's not any different from that?

Where I live, there is a private school that offers holiday club to all reception aged children and above. You don’t have to be a student at the school to use it and the school has great facilities.

Maybe there is something like that near you?

Is looking after your children much harder than teaching? I thought teaching was supposed to be really stressful.

So they are at nursery for some of the time.

It's a non issue compared to all the parents who are trying to organise child care for the next 6 weeks.

And has them fully the other 5 days. The issue is her husband not pulling his weight and that all childcare aspects, even putting them in nursery it seems, comes down to the op. It reads like she feels like a single parent in a two parent relationship. It must be exhausting.

Would love to be able to have the summer off with the kids! Alas I’ve got one week with them due to annual leave. You do realise that most parents don’t get any days off as we have to take all our annual leave when the kids are off and then we still have to pay a fortune for additional childcare as it’s not enough.

This.

You work PT, term time only so of course the bulk of the childcare falls to you! That doesn't mean it's all of it though.

Don't worry about next summer now, they'll be a year older and a year easier.

Besides, the summer holidays in England are so short, it's only six weeks! You'll get into a rhythm with it. And two whole days a week to yourself for those six weeks! Christ I would have killed for that when mine were that age.

By childcare I mean all different types; childminder/nursery when younger & now in primary there are loads of clubs that offer a short day, half day etc.

Oh @allsummereverysummer, your reply at 7.50 does explain more.

It sounds like you're ok with this year, as you'll have 2 child free days a week with the kids in nursery. However, for the next 10 years or so you won't have that, as they'll age out of nursery.

There is no reason why you can't book a couple of sports camps or similar, depending on their interests. However, once they're at school you might find they are more welcoming of the chance to chill and potter at home, and another year more mature to not follow you into the loo / whinge incessantly. Don't look for things to worry about - ie future years of holidays - seasons change and a year in the life of a 4(?) Year old is massive.

I have always spent the bulk of holidays with the children and always enforced naps / quiet time in the middle of the day, letting them stay up late once DH was home from work and often going out as a family in the evening after a chilled day at home. You too will find strategies. Parenting is hard but there will be moments of joy in the holidays, promise.

The OP has two days a week child free.

I think it’s just the age of your children, parenting little ones is absolutely relentless. Once the youngest gets a little older you’re going to have a fab time with them and will love your long summers!

You must struggle with reading then.