To ask if you free birthed?

I'd never heard of this before, but the name sounds awful as it reminded me of free diving - where people dive as deep as they can in the sea without oxygen for as long as they can. Inevitably lots of them die. Absolutely stupid, but to do this at childbirth, risking your baby's life and you're own, to potentially have your partner or someone else raise your baby without you - especially if you've already got children - is the most selfish stupid thing I've ever heard of.
This doula in Ireland still doesn't sound apologetic even after her customer died, almost glorifying the poor woman's death, "she birthed with incredible power". WTH?
I think the rise of conspiracy theories and mistrust in public services since Covid etc has something to with it, but this woman had 3 children already, 2 via C-section, so really should've shown a bit more wisdom and gratitude about the medical profession who'd kept her and her babies alive. Heartbreaking for her partner and children and should be a sobering lesson to everyone considering this.

Maybe you should tell your friend about this poor woman who died on her fourth pregnancy due to a free birth. Tragic. www.thejournal.ie/maternal-deaths-ireland-2-6421898-Jun2024/

Had a planned homebirth but the midwife arrived too late (my fault as didn't think I was in labour - my 3rd child 🤣). All went well however I would never plan not to have a medical professional present.

My twins arrived via emergency C-section at 32 weeks.

We were in SCBU for several weeks, the Intensive Care section. During that time we saw many babies arrive, not all of them premature. Some full-term were incredibly lucky to have survived, and only did because of swift medical attention.

A home birth or free birth is all well and lovely….unless it isn’t. And then your decision to give birth away from the hospital may just be the reason your baby doesn’t make it.

I know that sounds harsh but I saw many shell-shocked parents during our time in SCBU. Many of whom weren’t high risk or expecting a difficult birth. Many hadn’t expected complications or to have a baby that needed emergency and urgent care.

If something goes wrong every minute counts. And it could happen to anyone. Being at home could make the difference between life and death, quite literally.

I didn’t know I was in labour til I was almost fully dilated but as luck happens, I was at the hospital anyway. My DS went into sudden distress and I was whipped into surgery. He very nearly didn’t make it. Reading the medical reports after was sobering - 14 years on, I still get really upset reading how touch and go it was.

Having seen so many babies who had a very traumatic birth, I can’t fathom why anyone would risk not being in a medical facility. And I say this as someone who’s a real nature-loving hippy. Your baby is too precious to risk- and you never think that it’s going to be your baby that has a problem.

Risking your own health or the life of your baby is madness. And that applies to all home births as well as free births.

This could have been me if I had no medical intervention either....I don't think "freebirthing" is wise.
I get the hospital experience is often far from ideal for a variety of reasons, but we need to remember how medical intervention has impacted on survival rates of both women and babies.

I will also add - I had a retained placenta in both my births. I was wheeled off to theatre to have a spinal block and manual
removal of placenta. I couldn’t feel the bottom half of my body and it was bliss! If only I could who’ve had that during the birth…

If I was in the sticks I would have died of postpartum haemorrhage. No one has a clue if that could happen to them
and that’s the scary part. It won’t happen to most women but you can’t tell which is why I find it unhinged to have a home birth as you don’t know the complications that coudi
arise.

My friend has done it, twice. She is anti-establishment I many ways though. Her births were straightforward and her children healthy thank God.

A woman in Ireland died free birthing 3 weeks ago

I've had two home births - with a midwife!! - my son was a simple uncomplicated birth in the grand scheme of things, but my daughter (second born) would be dead if we hadn't had the expertise of the midwife and further assistance arrive shortly after.
A free birth is totally irresponsible in my opinion.

Free birthing 👉driving on the motorway without a seatbelt on yourself or your child.
Please don't do it.
Yes, medical trauma is real and horrific (been there, have the nightly night terrors to prove it) but not as horrific as potentially losing both your baby and/or your own life. For the babies whose mothers died how heartbreakingly awful must the knowledge be that their birth killed their mother?

Remember - labour is just your baby’s arrival into the world - at most it will last a few days and hopefully be much quicker than that. You’ll have endless opportunities after your baby is born to be close to nature with them. You don’t need it during labour.

I will add that though most women I know had positive hospital experiences, not all did. The understaffing issues at hospitals contribute to poor care. Make sure you’re being checked on regularly; if something doesn’t feel right speak up, ask questions, and don’t be fobbed off. This goes for all health issues.

Always advocate for yourself; you know your body best, and make sure your birthing partner is on hand to do that too.

“Excited101 · Yesterday 21:55
It’s one of the most selfish things a woman can do. There’s a pretty high chance everything will be fine, but anyone who knows anything about the ‘women dying in childbirth’ stats from history could tell you that without medical attention, the chance of death for mother and/or baby is also fairly likely.”

This with bells on. No mother who is properly considering her baby’s wellbeing would try to do this.

And I know of someone who tried this and died: her baby lived but she haemorrhaged after the labour and died because she was in the middle of nowhere. I also know of a couple of cases where pregnant mothers refused medically advised caesareans and the babies did not survive labour. It is unnecessary and totally irresponsible and it makes me very angry when this kind of stuff happens.

As another PP said - most birthing mothers want labour to be as easy and natural as possible but a sensible mother does not take unnecessary risks with her life or that of her child just for some idealised notion of a perfect, natural labour.

I’m a fan of properly managed home births - didn’t try it myself but know of many successful ones. But no - free birthing is selfish and irresponsible. Why would anyone take unnecessary risks with their baby’s or their own health?

Yes in a couple of states it’s illegal for a qualified midwife to attend a home birth. So you can free birth at home with zero help and no laws are being broken, but bring in a qualified health professional to assist you and suddenly it’s illegal.

I find it interesting how midwives aren’t a thing in much of America and seen as a bit ‘out there’ and alternative. The USA seems to have a highly medicalised attitude to birth but not great mortality rates despite this.

a friend of a friend apparently did this with her second child, they were lucky it turned out fine but I think it is hugely irresponsible.

Absolutely no fucking way...there's a reason why there are many professional midwife's...and doctors at hand if needed

No thanks. I’d like to give myself and my baby the best chance of survival so why would I do something so reckless when I have free access to modern medicine?

I would love to have had a free birth but made sure I had access to medical care because things can and do happen. I had my babies at home, three could safely have been free birthed, but the last one was an out of the blue massive PPH. The last one is why I never free birthed. You never know and I think you'd be foolish to do it.

And will you still think the idea sounds 'lovely' when you have to try and free your own baby from your pelvis during a shoulder dystocia and then subsequently resuscitate them adequately whilst waiting for an ambulance? (Because the NHS will be good enough for you then...) Will you be able to get hold of and administer the necessary drugs should you start to haemorrhage? No. Will you have gas and air at home? No. Should you sustain a anything above a 1st degree tear, is your husband happy to suture you at home in order to preserve your pelvic floor health and sexual health? No.

And did you know that the act of free birth itself isn't illegal, but if anyone with you assists you then that is illegal as they will be acting as a medical professional when they are not?

Fair enough you may not want to go to hospital, but at least let a trainer professional help you.

I think my DM did with her 3rd child, but as I was her 2nd and she was in the hospital 8 mins before I arrived I think she thought was made to give birth easily.
Her 4th child? They both would have died if she wasn't in hospital.
Maternity services are horrendous in this country, but still better than the alternative.

I did by accident. Ds1 was born at 35 and a half weeks in the middle of the life. It was before mobile phones were so freely available, I sent dh downstairs to call for a midwife/ambulance, and when he came back up I was holding the baby. Fortunately he started breathing just as I was preparing to to cpr but it was scary.

All of my babies came at around the 1 hour mark though so I was very lucky I only had to deliver one myself.

My planned home birth for my last one was the best experience.

I know someone who has had her last 2 children at home, not sure on “free births” but it wouldn’t surprise me if she did. I remember her joking when she first met her current DH (father of last 2 DCs) that they’d just have the babies on the farm, he’s delivered enough calf’s. She’s also a paediatric nurse so not untrained and they were her 4th & 5th children. Her third was very premature and seriously ill so I don’t think she’d have had the home births if she wasn’t confident they would be ok.

id actually never heard the term so had to look it up.

I have a friend (more of an acquaintance) who 'free birthed'. Apart from scans "for the cute photo" she refused antenatal cares

When she went into labour she stayed at home in a lot of pain for hours until she relented and allowed her husband to call an ambulance. She ended up in hospital with a back to back baby in distress needing emergency forceps.

She was a bit of a twat tbh she wanted to do absolutely everything her way and completely different to what most people do.

Not for any reason other than she doesn't like to follow the crowd.

Which is fine.

When it isn't yours and your unborn babies life you are risking.

She also had a stupid string of wool with a knitted rainbow attached instead of using a cord clamp which more than likely caused the infection on the belly button wound because obviously wool can't be cleaned and kept sterile

As someone who had a very acute and serious placental abruption during labour (2nd pregnancy, first birth was fine, no risk factors for PA) and had to be rushed into theatre for a category 1 c-section to save the baby’s life as well as my own (I was severely internally bleeding), I would strongly suggest you put this free birthing nonsense in the bin.

my baby and I are only alive because

• the midwife realised what was going on and acted quicklu
• i was in hospital when in happened (in Labour)

I had my first with only gas and air NOT THROUGH CHOICE - midwife said oh there will be a baby in an hour, you’re doing so well you don’t need anything.

4 hours later I was dying off as I’d been awake 43 hours and no baby but too late for any drugs….

2nd baby is said GIVE ME EVERYTHING I CAN HAVE!! And after being induced as I was 13 days over due, I was still begging for a c- section to take away the pain!!

I’m shit with pain and would never chose to have no pain relief! There are no medals for it so take what you can to make your experience as pleasant as possible for you.

I despise the competitive nature of giving birth!! “Holistic pain free, drug free, no epidural, no medical intervention makes you 100% the best” What a load of bollcks!

You do what you need to do to get your baby out safe and well. fuck the rest of the stepford house wives and what they say!