DD14 has a friend let’s call him Alf. They hang around in a small group after school most days, they sit/lie around in a nearby park chatting. A few times Alf has twisted DD’s leg up behind her (imagine she’s lying face down on the grass, head propped up on hands). She says he grabs her foot and lifts and twists it, she says it hurts and she and her friends have repeatedly told him not to, she also spoke to a teacher who had a word with him.
Yesterday DD comes home upset (she’s not easily rattled) saying that Alf twisted her leg again so she reached behind and dug her nails in his arm and scratched him quite hard. She said she was in tears as her foot really hurt. She said he stormed off swearing at her and she called after him something like ‘play stupid games win stupid prizes’.
I hate the thought of DD raising hands to another kid and she’s never done it before so I was surprised. But I also don’t think she was really in the wrong? I think she went about it the wrong way but I also think she retaliated in anger and pain. DH says he’s on the fence.
YABU - DD shouldn’t have reacted the way she did and she should apologise to Alf
YANBU - Alf deserved it after repeated warnings and he should apologise to DD