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Original poster

Is husband being unreasonable with mail?

63 replies

Cookingwithflo · 12/07/2024 15:54

I had bought my partner tickets to two shows in London, I've had to put them both down with his name as I'm going through a name change at the minute. We had just received the physical tickets today and I had asked if I could open them as I did buy them and wanted to check if all was okay, he's gone in a huff really and had said it's not fair and it is his mail to open as it is addressed to him. I know this is silly but I have spent over £300 on 2 concerts and 2 live events and it seems he is really just being ungrateful with them all at the moment. Of course I'm not expecting a thank you but I definitely did not expect this reaction to me asking if I can open the letter with the tickets.

Does anyone have any advice?

OP posts:
TeaGinandFags · 12/07/2024 23:56

Just open the fucking envelope.

Then hide them and find a way to leave him. He sounds like one that needs throwing back.

GoneFishingToday · 12/07/2024 23:39

Why didn't you just order the tickets in your new name OP? If I'd paid out this sort of money for a gift for my partner, and the contents were clearly marked in some way, I'd have opened the envelope without giving it a second thought. As for not expecting to be thanked !!!!!! I'm lost for words! Anyone who I buy a gift for, who doesn't instantly say thank you, finds that's the last gift they ever get from me. Up your standards OP! You are worth far more than this sort of treatment. Quite frankly, I find his behaviour disgusting!!

comedycentral · 12/07/2024 23:35

Hmm has he got secret bank accounts, credit cards statements or sti clinic tests he doesn't want you to see? Very odd otherwise in a marriage, it's not like you were snooping

DoreenonTill8 · 12/07/2024 23:33

Did you name change to Princess Consuela?

Original poster
Cookingwithflo · 12/07/2024 23:31

@FatOaf
Excuse me? I don't quite understand

OP posts:
Original poster
Cookingwithflo · 12/07/2024 23:30

@Sunnydiary
I'm not saying he's thick it's just that I had bought these tickets for us and he was at work, I was excited to finally get them so I asked because it was in his name. I had addressed them to him because I couldn't use a name that would no longer be legal on ID.

I don't see how I am coming across as his mum in this situation

OP posts:
Elcad · 12/07/2024 22:52

StrawberryWater · 12/07/2024 16:10

Even though you paid and organised it all he wants control over the tickets and I bet he has no plans to even take you along with him. He'll open that envelope when you're not around (making convenient excuses not to do it in front of you) and then he'll refuse to show you the tickets and then he'll take someone else.

That definitely a possibility...

saraclara · 12/07/2024 22:45

I'm very private and normally wouldn't open anyone's mail or want mine opening. But in this case, if it was abundantly clear from the envelope that it contained the tickets I'd booked and paid for, I'd have opened it without a second thought!

What a strange man.

ButWhatAboutTheBees · 12/07/2024 22:45

But a name change doesn't mean it can't be addressed to OP

And if she wants to insist on opening them then she needs to address then to her

Bluebirdover · 12/07/2024 22:43

ButWhatAboutTheBees · 12/07/2024 22:22

Don't address them to him?

It is his mail and he can tell you not to open it

The reason why it's been addressed to him is in the OP.

Justcallmebebes · 12/07/2024 22:39

SareBear87 · 12/07/2024 22:18

Me three, and DH wouldn't have batted an eyelid!

Same here. I wouldn't have even asked and my DP probably wouldn't have even noticed and wouldn't care if he had

FatOaf · 12/07/2024 22:34

Are you going to the shows to celebrate your 12th birthdays?

littleredcaravan · 12/07/2024 22:32

Me and my husband open absolutely every letter that comes through the door regardless of the name, depending on who is home when it comes through the letterbox.

We never open parcels just because if you've ordered something for yourself it's nice to do the unboxing etc yourself. Unless it's Amazon because we get something from Amazon every other day at least and share prime Grin

Unless he has extremely sensitive and confidential work related mail, he is being a cunt on a power trip and/or hiding something.

billyt · 12/07/2024 22:31

What a fool he is.

My wife and I opened any mail that came. Nothing to hide so why not?

Any thing I wanted to surprise her with, I 'd get sent to one of my daughters.

Some people.

Soonenough · 12/07/2024 22:28

He is being pathetic.

Fintoo · 12/07/2024 22:27

Why do you need to open the envelope in order to check the tickets? Can’t you check them after he’s opened it?

ButWhatAboutTheBees · 12/07/2024 22:22

Don't address them to him?

It is his mail and he can tell you not to open it

SareBear87 · 12/07/2024 22:18

Me three, and DH wouldn't have batted an eyelid!

AmelieTaylor · 12/07/2024 22:16

TapToSkip · 12/07/2024 22:09

Trying to decide if I’m impressed that you asked him for permission (even if it resulted in an answer you didn’t want), or if I’m a dickhead because I’d just have opened them without checking 🤔

@TapToSkip

id have just opened them too!!

TapToSkip · 12/07/2024 22:09

Trying to decide if I’m impressed that you asked him for permission (even if it resulted in an answer you didn’t want), or if I’m a dickhead because I’d just have opened them without checking 🤔

PerfectTravelTote · 12/07/2024 22:08

"Of course I'm not expecting a thank you"

Why not?

OhcantthInkofaname · 12/07/2024 22:05

WTF?

Sunnydiary · 12/07/2024 22:02

I’m not sure I understand this tbh.

Are you saying he’s so thick, he wouldn’t notice if the tickets were wrong? How likely is that anyway? If they are for him why can’t he open the envelope?

You are coming across like his mum rather than his partner.

Bluebirdover · 12/07/2024 21:58

StrawberryWater · 12/07/2024 16:10

Even though you paid and organised it all he wants control over the tickets and I bet he has no plans to even take you along with him. He'll open that envelope when you're not around (making convenient excuses not to do it in front of you) and then he'll refuse to show you the tickets and then he'll take someone else.

Now that's some kind of over active imagination!

Agapornis · 12/07/2024 16:29

If your name change is to his, I'd reconsider.