DD(5) attacked in park by classmates

I have been through this myself but luckily I could fight back. My daughter had a miserable 1st year at High School when a so called friend turned all her other friends against her. The friends father had a go at me after I contacted some of the Mums and threatened me. I went to the school and was told that the whole family despite their respectable facade were troublemakers and known to the school. Luckily the situation resolved when the girls realised that they had made a mistake regarding so called friedSome schools will not take responsibility for things that occur outside school.
OK I am well able to stick up for my family but I feel your anxiety. So if possible make your presence felt go to the school let everyone see you do it. With DH if possible at your side. Meet DD from school as often as poss go to the park and make sure bullies see you you don’t have to be clingy let DD do her thing. Just be around as much as possible. Let them know that the incident will not be repeated or tolerated and If you have to get higher authorities involved you will. Be strong because it’s really important not to let this go on. Parents don’t want to be told their kids are brats they probably know. Good Luck

This is hard because it is off school premises. That’s not to say the school shouldn’t act, but it does mean they aren’t responsible imo. Your husband was there - did he intervene? I would tell the school what has happened at the park and I’d expect them to be contacting parents about behaviour like this.
If your daughter is being bullied then I would insist they stop that and by whatever means necessary and now. If it’s the same children in the park and bullying I would be very forceful with the school as there’s a clear link there. Best of luck x

She didn't say anything about 'marching'... I would do the same if it was only next door and the school was still open. The reason being that my child would have to be amongst little bully boys the next day and I'd want the teachers to be made aware that their parents need contacting. She also said the parents could not be found, and I imagine consoling your child in pain would take priority over searching for absent parents. What's strange is you blaming OP/her DH for what took place instead of the group of boys attacking a little girl unprovoked..

You most very definitely NOT being unreasonable. What horrible behaviour. I really your DD and her friend are ok. If school
refuse to do anything, I’d report it to safeguarding. Even if it’s happening outside of school, it could easily happen in school
because all the kids go there.

I mean sure, report it to the school. However as it happened outside of school hours and premises - I’d be looking to speak to the boys parents yourself? Maybe your DH as he witnessed the incident?

If your DH had a pack of 5-7yo boys with no parents alone at the playground, he should have called the police for their safety. That would also help grab the attention of boys and parents.

I don't know why teachers wouldn't want to know as an FYI, it builds out a pattern of behaviour to watch for.

Omg this is awful I would speak the head teacher don't worry if you cry your being a protective mum they should speak to children involved and there parents. Maybe say parents should know as kids unsupervised is child neglect at that age. Also whist in school uniform they have to deal with it. Threaten with police if necessary and school governors. Just because there 5 doesn't mean they should not get a telling off. I would have wanted to hit them but we can't do this. Like someone said if there like that at 5 what about another 5 years.

If it’s a small village surely you can find out who the parents are. You need to do this and go and deal with this situation directly.

And here lies the issue - people like you enable this.

That child is a bully and will be a bully in school; it is a mutual place where parents can discuss his behaviour and a sanction in place as he is in uniform.

Stop victim blaming, no child should have to put up with this - aged 5 or aged 10.

Btw your poor baby. I hope that you are ok @worriedmama91.
Well done to your Dh as well for being so level headed.

What was the outcome from today OP?

Sorry but as a teacher, I could remind children about behaviour and what’s not acceptable and there would be consequences for anything in school, however this was on your DH - he should have been close enough to DD to step in - he should have roared as soon as he heard them say they were going for her.
Her friend had her mum to help her so DH should have been aware that these kids were vicious and could go for his daughter.

I hope things improve and your DH is more aware next time too.

Don’t just mention it at drop off. Request a meeting with both the class teacher and the head as a matter of urgency. Keep your daughter off of school until you can be sure that the school are taking action.

The 6 year olds reaction to your Dh isn’t normal.

When my child had an issue at school that subsequently ended in the park after school when mine had enough of said child… we got the most abusive messages from the parents. Laughable now but I was absolutely furious that said child had picked on many others over the previous weeks yet their child was innocent. (We’d witnessed numerous occasions just not the day it happened to our child) anyway, school wanted nothing to do with it however, child was in uniform representing the school and incidents had occurred during class time too.
teacher called the next day to apologise incidents had happened in her care, (she was unaware) but that she would keep a closer eye… i just asked that they were kept completely separately and that if anything else were to happen I would involve the police.
unfortunately, you do get vile children but also means they likely have vile parents. No child at 5/6 should be behaving like that (rough play or not!) and making excuses rather than dealing with it is the reason so many are as vile as they are!
speak up to school the incidents such as the park don’t just happen at the park and you want to know your child will be kept away from the child!

Schools are entitled to discipline pupils for behaviour off school premises. Department for Education guidance gives various instances in which it would be appropriate, including conduct:

when wearing school uniform;
when in some other way identifiable as a pupil at the school;
that could have repercussions for the orderly running of the school;
that poses a threat to another pupil; or
that could adversely affect the reputation of the school.

So absolutely this school can and should deal with this. OP, has there been any follow-up since yesterday?

Issuing threats of violence to other children is also liable to get him into big trouble. He reacted appropriately.

Isn't it obvious that OP is entitled to ask what steps the school will take to keep her daughter safe from these bullies when she is in school?

Something very similar happened to my son. The school was rubbish they said because it was off their grounds it wasn't their problem. Our issue was that the bullying started in school and carried on outside od school.

His mother was ' boys will be boys' type.
Long story short, one of the boys went for my son while I was their at pick up so I grabbed him by the scruff of his neck and shouted 'if you ever touch my son again you will have to deal with me now fuck off.' Majority of the parents thought it was brilliant, the teacher tried to reprimand me to which I replied 'your fault for not handling it' and his mother was furious. I told his mother in earshot of everyone exactly gow I felt and her son and the other gang of boys bullying my son and how from now on how I would be dealing with it personally rather than school!
She quietly walked away.

I’m shocked by what happened, outraged by the school’s response. Does your daughter have a bruise? Call the police if the school won’t do anything. This was an attack. What kind of kids do this in front of adults? Are you able to move your daughter? Sorry to say I don’t think she’s in a safe environment. At 5 you should have no cares in the world and school should be fun. I hope your little one is okay.

I would be finding out who the boys parents are and speaking to them. Don’t need to be confrontational, just explain what’s happened. I’d be beside myself if this happened to one of my little boys

A few things
First the school would not release a 5 year old except to their parent/carer, and given there is nothing about except the school and the park, i find it hard to believe the parents are not there in their somewhere near by (eg in cars) So I do not think you can say they have been neglected.
I think its a bit rich your dh marching into school going on about the school not keeping her safe, when the incident happened on her parents watch!!
The school can log your husband's report on CPOMs or whatever but I cant see they can do anything more. The kids had all been handed over to their respective parents, and they cannot start sanctioning children for an incident they dont even know happened !

Absolutely this, I bet their parents would have come forward if he had hoisted them into the air by the jumpers. I was pushed into the road as a child, luckily my mum was nearby and grabbed the child and told them what would happen if they continued with that behaviour, their parents came round, but funnily enough when my parents had told the full story they went away quietly. Some kids need the fear of god putting in to the. Your poor DD 😓

We have no idea who DH spoke to. He went into the school. It could have been the head, the secretary or even a cleaner. The latter two are the most likely to be around in the entrance hall, frankly.

Many posters are entirely jumping the gun here. What was said by a random adult when, unexpectedly, a dad arrived after school hours about an issue in the park next door, isn't necessarily indicative of what the appropriate adult will say tomorrow, when the reasonable question about how they will protect DD from those boys is asked.

That. Yes, tell the school tomorrow as you're concerned that these boys might be a risk to your daughter, but don't 'kick up a stink'. It's not their job to supervise a park that just happens to be next door, or to come and sort out children whose parents are present, outside school hours.

It's really odd that their DH went to the school instead of sorting it himself. No wonder the adult he spoke to sounded confused.

The school should absolutely be speaking to the boys in question and their parents. I would ask the question how are they going to ensure your DDs physical safety and stop these boys from assaulting her in school? I'm shocked that your DH was told boys play a little rough! What a ridiculous response! Was this from your DDs teacher or the Head? Try and stay calm when you speak to the teacher tomorrow, not easy I know when you're raging. I hope your little one is ok 🫂