Sentences that start with 'kindly..........' that go on to say something that is ANYthing but 'kind.'
'Reader, I told him to go away...; Starting a sentence with 'reader.' Just F off!
'You sound unhinged.' Spiteful, nasty, unkind, cruel thing to say. (See also 'you sound deranged.')
I live in a 'naice' area.' (Very likely live in a suburb on the edge of a big town, full of people who think they're middle class.)
Tinkly laugh, head tilt, spider willies.
Saying 'no?' at the end of a sentence. As a pps said, it's so patronising no?
As a pp said, mocking and deriding someone who doesn't eat large amounts of food by snidely calling them 'teeny tiny' fucks me off! I once said that DH and I share a large battered fish and a standard bag of chips, and have a large pot of curry sauce with it, (from the chip shop,) and a slice of bread and butter each. Several posters said 'LOL, teeny tiny! Do you have a massive salad for lunch?!' Someone said I was weird, as no-one does that unless they're 'very elderly.' 
Not true, because DH and I do, and we're in our early-mid 50s! Just piss off with your food-eating-shaming and mocking you twat!