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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think dH has well and truly done it for me! Quick responses needed pls!

142 replies

Iusedtobecarmen · 10/07/2024 23:19

Been with DP 20 yrs plus. 4 dc. Not getting on great for a while. Long story. He talks to me like shit(denies it) I sulk. Vicious circle.
Make up for a bit. Back to square one.
Anyhow. Fell out a week or so ago. Silent treatment all round.
I have a hen do in Europe. Leaving tomorrow for 2 days. I didn't want to leave on bad terms as I normally never leave him and dc.
Made a kind of apology/ make the peace on Monday. He didn't really respond.
Thought tonight he may try and speak or make amends. He hasn't. Leave 10am tomorrow I won't see him. I said goodnight, see you in 2 days. He just said yeah see ya.
I could cry. It's ruined my time away. He's been an arsehole. I've never felt like this before. Pls respond ASAP as I have to be up at 5am😪

OP posts:
StSwithinsDay · 10/07/2024 23:26

Not getting on great for a while. Long story. He talks to me like shit(denies it) I sulk. Vicious circle.
Make up for a bit. Back to square one.
Anyhow. Fell out a week or so ago. Silent treatment all round.

Your poor kids.

Cheesecakelunch · 10/07/2024 23:26

Just ignore him back for now. Go and enjoy your trip.

How is he with your DC? Bring them treats home from your trip as I imagine they will miss you and have to put up with his sulking and shit parenting for a few days.

Original poster
Iusedtobecarmen · 10/07/2024 23:26

Thanks all. Really positive. Just needed to rant I suppose.

OP posts:
BarryCantSwim · 10/07/2024 23:26

Go and enjoy yourself.

Has it occurred to you you’re being punished for the trip and he wants to make it miserable for you.

WallaceinAnderland · 10/07/2024 23:26

You both sound immature and you are creating a toxic environment for your children. That's what you should really be thinking about.

IDontLoveTheWayYouLie · 10/07/2024 23:25

He's probably doing it so you think about it the whole time you're away or so you change your mind don't go.

As long as the kids will be fine and looked after I wouldn't even worry about him.

ShouldIEvenBother · 10/07/2024 23:25

Ratfinkstinkypink · 10/07/2024 23:22

He's doing this to spoil your time away, don't give him that power.

This!

Also, you do not have to be with someone who talks to you like shit, (this also includes regardless of how long you've been together).

Go and enjoy your holiday and when you get back have a good long think about what your ideal future looks like. Is he in it?

uxie · 10/07/2024 23:25

He is doing this to ruin your trip! Forget about him and have a good time. Deal with him when you're back.

Whatmonth · 10/07/2024 23:24

Go and enjoy your weekend nothing you can do now to change what's happend.
Then when back think about what YOU want to do.
How old are the children. They whatever age know what is going on.
Do you want to live this life for the next however many years.
Get your ducks in a row.

MonsteraMama · 10/07/2024 23:24

Get some sleep, compartmentalise this into a little "fuck this till I get back" box in your head, and go and have an amazing time.

When you get home, you need to have the "come to Jesus" talk. A relationship full of arguing, being nasty, sulking and silent treatment is no relationship (and not a happy environment for any kids to be in) so you both need to decide if you want to salvage the relationship, which would probably mean counselling, or get started on separation.

But for now, for right now - fuck it. Party like you're 22 and have an amazing time, blow off the steam and the funk of the silent treatment, don't let it spoil your trip.

Pippa12 · 10/07/2024 23:23

I think he thinks you’ll make a grand gesture to make up before you go! Or he wants to ruin it for you.

Dig deep- do nothing, let him stew. Let him feel the emptiness of the house whilst your away. Try your best to park it and enjoy your two days.

When your back think hard if this is how you want the rest of your life to be!

Have a great time!

Ginoclockk · 10/07/2024 23:23

Why are you letting him spoil it. Go and have fun. Don't waste your break on his bullshit.

TheChosenTwo · 10/07/2024 23:23

I’m not really sure what you want us to say really.
I’d just advise pretending he doesn’t exist for the time that you’re away and dealing with the next step when you get back.

Ratfinkstinkypink · 10/07/2024 23:22

He's doing this to spoil your time away, don't give him that power.

davegrohll · 10/07/2024 23:22

Oh op, go and enjoy yourself! Men are such arseholes !!

ParrotPirouette · 10/07/2024 23:21

Go and enjoy yourself, don’t let him ruin anything more than he has already.

Twodozenroses · 10/07/2024 23:21

Go to sleep. Focus on your time away and try to enjoy. Deal with him and the relationship shit when you’re home. I hope you manage to have a good time away. Don’t let him spoil it for you