Wearing a skimpy bikini around teenage son

Parents try and control what teenagers wear

@Behappyandbehave have you tried a bikini on in a changing room under those lights that show every single dimple?? If you can pass that at 40 + and after losing weight, then go ahead! Sod what everyone else says

But I think we should have respect for our teenage children and take their feelings into consideration. Very few teenage boys would be happy to be in a public place with their mum showing her bum!

I know the official answer is probably "why on earth wouldn't you? There's nothing inherently sexual about an item of clothing (even if it's extremely uncomfortable, and designed purely for the male gaze) and everyone who thinks it might make the teenager uncomfortable is a paedo for even thinking such a sexualised thought about an under 18"

My actual answer is that there is absolutely zero chance that I would subject my poor teenagers to that!

But the OP has stated this is not the case! We are talking a little cheeky here.

The other issue is should teens be the ones to police their parents?

I grew up in a culture where women are more covered, though not full body covering. I didn't like it and now wear what I want. But I am just as alarmed at the way women are now expected to display themselves constantly and shoot themselves full of plastic to be attractive. While the men can be comfy and natural, for want of a better phrase. I am not keen on either end of the spectrum. Moderation in all things for me.

Well we are naturists, including our teenage son, so we are all used to seeing each other naked on the beach, not a problem, but I wouldn't wear a thong in public as it seems really sexualised (and ugly and uncomfortable). Either full bum-covering swimsuit for textile beaches, or nothing for the FKK beaches. Nothing in between!

I’m almost 40 and I’ve just bought a high waist big pant style bikini because I have teenage boys. They would be mortified if I had a skimpy thong on 🤷🏻‍♀️

Yes! Thank you for being a voice of common sense and especially for this line:
It’s OK to feel attractive and to be a mother. The two are not mutually exclusive.

I'm perplexed by how people basically state it's either or thing or another and you can't be both at once. What a ridiculous thread.

I will never understand how anyone thinks it's ok to be out in public with their arsehole just "covered" with a piece of string 😦

So if someone is genuinely asking for advice on a look, if people disagree with the look they had issues

So if someone said 'I am going to a wedding I want to wear a tutu' people are only allowed to say 'of course that is great idea you will look wonderful in anything' otherwise they have issues

So what is the point of every asking a question if the replies have to be 'sure great idea'?

I’m strongly in the “wear whatever the hell you want” camp. However, I see your argument @ghostlyliving and it’s a point well made. And, imo, a stronger argument than many of the ageist, misogynistic comments so far.

I wouldn't. For one thing my own weight loss at a similar age to you left me with skin that needs a bigger bikini not a smaller one! For another, my DSs get upset and uncomfortable when I get attention from creepy men. They hate the looks and comments and disrespect of the sleezy individuals out there, feeling constantly they need to say something, and I wouldn't put showing my bum 'on principle', ahead of them being able to relax on holiday.

I can't get over some of these responses 😂

All these women shaming another woman, saying it would look awful/not classy/not flattering - are.we.not supposed to be lifting each other up not pulling us down.

I suspect most people pulling you down over this have issues with themselves and are projecting.

It is your body and you can choose how to adorn it (clothes, accessories, etc).

I hope what you choose is based on your decision and not a bunch of strangers on the Internet.

Enjoy your holiday!

Even if you are really slim in your 40s I still don't think you can pull off like the 20s year old can! In front of your Son too. I won't repeat what others have said...

i feel the same way about this the way I do about Muslim women and full body covering and the niqab. I’ve heard ( Western converts) talk angrily about it being their choice and no one should object to that. But it’s not about it being your choice. It’s about it being a choice presented to women than is not presented to men. When I am on the beach and I see the young men in their cool, loose, comfy baggy short and then the young women in their ridiculous tight, tiny, barely covering their genitals and not covering their arse, barely bikinis, that look they look uncomfortable and incredibly self conscious in, I think ‘nah that’s not equality’.

I wondered that too. I've seen loads of women wearing thongs and have never looked closely enough to see if they've wiped their bum properly!

People are getting bigger at the sane time as clothes are getting smaller, tighter, stretcher and more transparent. As they say " Just because you can, doesn't mean you should '

True though

Oh come off it. Nobody has a 'good body' after 40. Nature sees to that. Connective tissue and collegen are decreasing, few bits are tight.

This isn't true, although admittedly it can take more work.
I'm a Caroline Girvan adherent and on her fb group, and some of the bodies of women in their forties, fifties and beyond are absolutely amazing.

And thinking about it, most people with good bodies will definitely still have them at 40, that is well before the menopause stuff for most.

Maybe a slight deviation. I am one of 2 sisters, now in my 40s. When l was a teen, mum regularly went topless at the beach.

I agree they look awful. Why are we seeing more and more of women's bodies and less and less of men's, swimming shorts for men longer than ever. Same goes for those awful stretch nude legging things girls and women are wearing. Labia, celluite all clearly visible. Who's designing all this garbage?

Your teen will find something to be embarrassed about whatever you do. Wear the thong.
I did it a few years ago, dd wasn’t a teen, and she shouted ‘MUMMMMEEEEEEEEE. I CAN SEE YOUR BOTTOM’. I think, on the whole, I’d prefer silent disapproval’ 🤣🤣

How closely are you looking at these people's bums?