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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Being so tight with money?

984 replies

Rockrose94 · 08/07/2024 21:31

For context I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years, we live together and split the rent / bills 50/50. Our take home pay is very similar and I have an extra outgoing of my car finance which he does not. We effectively keep our finances completely separate, I worry how this will work long term as he has said he does not want to share finances at all as he has more savings.

Anyway the main issue just now is 1) he has bought me dinner once in 4 years, for my 30th birthday present. I took him on a foreign holiday and presents for his 30th. I have paid for nights away and meals for us several times when he has said he can't afford it as I wanted to treat him. I don't do this often any more as it's never been reciprocated 2) we split all food shops evenly but usually do our own meals during the week as I am dieting. He just stood for half an hour itemising up every item on the food shops over the weekend to come to the point that I owe him £2.50. Note that he will charge me half of the food we share but he would likely eat 2/3 of the meal. AIBU to be tired of this? It feels so tight , do other people itemise everything and charge their partner almost to the penny?!

OP posts:
LewishamMumNow · 08/07/2024 21:36

Leave him. He's using you. If you do have kids, make sure you are married and have details of his savings, so you can screw him.

Idontjetwashthefucker · 08/07/2024 21:35

Fuck that shit. Tally up everything you've spent on him and tell him he owes you hundreds, if not thousands.

Or just fuck him off

JollyGreenSnake · 08/07/2024 21:34

Of course he has more savings... you've been covering lots of discretionary/nice spending for him.

Run. Please do not have children or commit to a mortgage with this man.

Ragwort · 08/07/2024 21:34

What's the point of having this man as a 'partner' ... just ditch him and 'date' if you want to see him... although I can't imagine he would offer more than a walk in the park and a glass of tap water.

Merryoldgoat · 08/07/2024 21:34

End it now. This is a mean man who you will grow to resent and he’ll make you miserable.

Kovus · 08/07/2024 21:33

The only positive thing about staying with him is that no other women will have to experience his miserly, soul-sapping attitude.

That's it.

Keeva2017 · 08/07/2024 21:32

That sounds dire! How do you fancy him? Yanbu.

RandomMess · 08/07/2024 21:32

He isn't careful he's miserly.

Run for the hills and fast.

Hugesunflower · 08/07/2024 21:32

Don’t have children with this man.