To find this really weird and annoying

Bloody magnificent diagram; well done OP.

I sympathise with the 'nosy Privet Drive' neighbours; I have one of those.

But no, YANBU at all. That's making out that they're your best friends and have a close relationship that entitles them to trot all the way round your property.

If you can't afford a gate atm, are you able to make a temporary 'block' to the side entrance i.e. do you have a pallet that would fit the gap that you could wedge in place? Or place some potted plants there to make an obstacle course?

Are you in Yorkshire?

PS fantastic diagram!

I think a diplomatic way to do it is to claim that the baby has unpredictably timed naps in the bedroom and that people walking past are waking them up, so it's front door only please!

If you can't run to a gate at the mo, just leave the back door locked and if they knock go to the front door and call them around. They will soon get bored of walking back past the house if the back door isn't opened for them.

I came here for the diagram. I am not disappointed!

That is a fine diagram. I agree about putting something on your back door saying not to use and anytime anyone knocks on your back door either ignore or answer the front door and call them round.

I think you have a few choices about their concerns regarding the parking, bins and weeds. You can nod, smile and ignore. Keep telling them on repeat that you are happy with the situation and repeat. Or you can cut them off and tell them that they are BU and you won’t discuss it further, then when they bring it up say “I’ve told you I am not discussing this” and close the door.

I suspect they only really have an issue because they aren’t busy and are used to things being a certain way but YANBU.

Honestly, this was worth it for the diagram alone. What a thing of beauty.

And YANBU to find it weird and annoying. Your neighbours sound intrusive and weird. I would definitely be telling them, in a polite way, to mind their own business. You aren't obliged to keep your lawn weed-free - it's your lawn, not theirs, and you can have it looking as neat or as 'natural' as you like.

They wouldn't like living next door to me - I do cut my grass reasonably regularly but I let the clover, daisies and buttercups grow in between cuts and I love seeing the bees enjoying them. I never use weedkiller because it's terrible for the environment.

I'm sorry, I just came here to say excellent diagram :)

Excellent diagram.
I feel your pain I once had a neighbour let themselves in my house catching me stark naked in the kitchen ( they did knock after that!!)
Long term only a gate will do. But agree with previous poster ( do not answer the back door- even if they can see you. Go to the front door and shout "hello"
maybe if you want to be naughty block the side access with your bins and if anyone mentions it say "we are only putting them there until we get a gate as we keep getting random people coming around the back"

Since you're so talented at diagrams, put one on the back door showing visitors exactly where to go. Then pretend you can't hear them knocking on the back door.

And let the grass grow, weed killer is evil stuff. You'll be the talk of the cul de sac!

I love your biodiversity lecture! The weed killered lawn is outdated and quite ignorant.

Where I grew up we very rarely used the front door. Everyone came round the back even though like your house it was the long way round. The milkman - everyone used it.
I reckon it’s just the way it is in your neighbourhood. Or as mentioned previous owners. I have a friend who never locks her door and expects everyone to open it , come in and shout out ‘hello’. Now she does not have the nicest of marriages but still do this (I actually pause at the door for a minute to listen for anything untoward). I couldn’t stand that - I also hate people dropping in unannounced. My door is locked.
The weed thing etc is just a red herring here. And yes best diagram ever!

Have you asked them to use the front door? If not, why not?

I can’t imagine there would be any sensible reason to use the back door (except if they were leaving something for you which they thought might be prone to theft). Just say that you would prefer them to come to the front door, their using the back door makes you nervous because it surprises you and the baby.

Unless they are either nosy or weird, they will go along with it. And if they don’t , they will be proclaiming their status as nosy or weird, so….

Signed Very Elderly person who has not become inconsiderate with age - yet.
👩🏻‍🦯

In 20 years on here I've never seen such a superb diagram. Top notch.

If money is too tight for the gate now, just tell them the next time you see them you're putting in a gate soon (be vague but imply very soon), so probably best to start using the street door. Then you can do it when you an afford it in a year or whatever.

Can even ham it up talking about adding some cameras, motion light etc. Say a stranger came round the side and just made you realise how exposed it is so have decided to make more secure and private.

I'd be putting a fence between the house and the wall that's too high to climb. With a lockable gate if the space is as wide as it looks in the diagram.

Get a sign for your garden that says 'pardon the weeds, we are feeding the bees', you can get cute ones. That should stop annoying dandelion comments. And if they still comment, point to the sign.

Absolutely ridiculous they are going around into your back garden, get a little sign that says private and pop it on a piece of string or a chain that you link from fence to house, it will be a cheap solution.

I was staying at a holiday home in Ireland once and the neighbour just opened the front door without knocking and walked right into the house, I nearly fell over at the rudeness. Everyone was still in their PJs. Some people have different ways, I am very into privacy.

Yeh you definitely need a gate! With a lock on the inside!

Id just reply with 'oh I'm leaving those for the bees - it's advisable not to kill dandelions' (this is true)

10/10 for diagram, and edits.
I think you need a gate - and having a napping baby is a good excuse to insist in front door only. Good luck!

Just refuse to answer the back door. If someone knocks, open the front door and shout “ hello, hello, did someone knock, is anyone there?”. Force them to walk around back to the front of your house and tell them you don’t use the back door. Do this every single time.

Put a sign on the back door, 'Please use front door'.

Put a gate up on the drive? If there already is one put a padlock on it.

I also think go out through the front door look around the back and say, 'Can I help, we don't use the backdoor for visitors.' Looking suitably confused and bemused. Or go out holding a big stick and a phone and say 'Goodness you gave me a scare I thought you were a burglar prowling around in the back garden like that, I was just about to phone the police.' Waving phone, and then gently explain it's much safer to use the front door, where you expect visitors to arrive.

I guess it may be the way they interacted with the previous neighbours, some people like that informality.

I would put in a gate from the front corner of your house to their wall that is locked from the inside. Problem solved

Excellent diagram, especially liking the good use of colour.
I grew up in Yorkshire and back doors were for friends/neighbours and the front was for more formal visitors - could it be something like that?
Where I live now a lot of people use a side or back door if accesssible (ours is behind a gate)
I think if they knock at the back you should not open it and just yell "go round the front please"

Excellent diagram 👏
Agree with the gates 👏

I also suggest you also ask nosey neighnour's advice regarding installation of a pigeon loft, as you've been considering one for a while and are keen to have one installed as soon as possible.