Rich ‘friend’ harassing me

Not a real man. As he's such a child, I'd contact his parents and show them the messages. Explain you agreed to pay him back in Friday and he's intimidated you

im more upset about how my supposed friend even had the idea to get his male friends to harass me. Who does that?

Not a friend, that’s for sure. As pp have said pay him back then block him, that’s a horrible, bullying thing to do.

He sounds like a complete twunt! Pay him the money back when you promised to originally, then cut him off! He's either got a very sick sense of humour, or he's power crazy, neither of which will benefit you in any way going forward! With friends like these, who needs enemies?! Let him go out with his weird friends in future and leave the lot to it! 🌻

Well, he has shown you that your friendship is worth less than 40 quid to him. Pay off and bin.

I doubt the OP is the first person to think she had her budget under control and then an unexpected vet bill pops up. Yes, we should have an emergency plan for that, but sometimes people don't.

One of my cats

So multiple pets requiring feeding and other items, and you can't afford sanitary towels?? You have your priorities WAY wrong.

So you're using PDSA but going out and spending 40 quid on drinks?! Your priorities are totally skewed and the PDSA help you're taking for free could go to someone who isn't going out on the lash. Catch yourself on.

Don't get into debt to go drinking on someone else's whim.

Absolutely you do, but surely you can see it’s an ill-advised move to get into debt to someone who sounds potentially dangerous? The fact that you ‘deserve’ some leisure pleasures doesn’t mitigate this. And gently, pets are expensive. Ill pets are incredibly expensive. If you’re this close to the breadline in general, that unexpected vet bills leave you without food or sanitary towels, it doesn’t sound like something you can afford. And yes, that’s unfair.

This

This? Why!?

Never, ever get into debt just to socialise.

Rich friends don't lend you money so you can keep up with them socially. They treat you, because they can.

Whether you accept their generosity or not is up to you.

A genuine friend would never encourage you to spend money you don't have.

PDSA is a good shout, see if you qualify. I had a period of being on the bones of my backside and qualified for PDSA when I got council tax support but I think there's a few benefits that can qualify you too.

If you ask for “Sandy” at a Morrisons customer service desk they’ll give you a package that has a couple of pads in

Him and his mates sound like a load of wrong uns. Block them all.
Tbh I'd actually consider not paying him at all. After what you said about your lack of period products. You need the money more than he does.

He's very dodgy....do he and his friends know where you live/work etc?

Sadly I wouldn't be surprised if they try to turn up in person to harass/humiliate you/demanding sexual favours or something.

If any more contact is made, send a clear message to him and his friends AND the company run by his family (send it so his parents get involved) calmly saying you find the behaviour threatening, outline the amount (£40) and that he agreed to loan it, and there was an agreed time to pay it back, and that you request no further contact and it is causing you a lot of distress and you find it threatening and manipulative.

He's probably relying on you feeling too embarrassed to speak out....bullies back off if they think their victim is going to make a fuss.

Screenshot this and don't get into any more discussion.

As soon as you've paid him back tell him if he ever sics his friends on you again or harasses you in any way you will involve the police.
Stalking and harassment are offences under the Protection from Harassment Act 1997.

Bloody people. I was given £2000 when we were stuck in the crash. After that I was monitored for any spend. The woman is a multi millionaire! I gave it back to her with interest. She'd told countless mutual friends. She still thinks she can ask me about my money. It was 16 years ago.
I only have lends and borrows from family these days.
I second the food banks for pads etc
The guy likes the power, dickhead.

Yeah, I think he was unreasonable. He should have offered to pay if he really wanted to go out. I've done similar for a less well off friend when there was a restaurant I really fancied. But it was a gift given with no strings. I think suggesting you borrow the money just pushes the problem into next month, hence why he shouldn't have offered the loan and you shouldn't have accepted it. Sometimes you just can't afford a thing and that's that.

Although he sounds terrible at managing his money if he's as well off as you say!

That's outrageous to treat you like this, just send it when you said you would. And then drop him like a hot potato.

(The state of your finances are not his concern also what he uses his money for is not your business).

I guess peer pressure. He sounds like a bully.

He’s not your friend. Pay him back and then ghost him.

Came on to say about the supermarkets giving you a package of free sanitary items. Might only be enough for a day but that’s a days better than toilet roll.

This and I dont say that lightly- he has nefarious intentions.

Pay him back when you can and never ever borrow money off him ever again and block him.

The only thing I find a bit strange on your side is why did you go out for drinks (which you knew you had to pay back) if you cant afford sanitary pads?