I attended a film/TV club today. Admittedly I'd only seen the first episode of the show being discussed but the group info said that everyone was welcome whether they'd seen it or not, and didn't mind spoilers.
There were about 7 others there, this was my first time attending as I'm relatively new in the city and looking to make new friends.
I felt completely out of my depth. I can discuss general themes but the discussion they had became very philosophical/metaphysical and ime went way beyond the series itself.
It was a very structured event, the host went around the group asking everyone the same question, I honestly didn't know what to say when it came to my turn and asked to skip/have more time to think about it.
I was more than happy to listen to others but I think they had expected everyone to partake in discussion, which is fair enough.
I ended up going early and I'm sure I heard them laughing as I left, even though they'd been polite whilst I was there.
I'm glad I made the effort to go in the first place but I felt quite thick leaving.
I'm educated, have a Master's, can speak other languages and I do enjoy travelling and so on.
I like watching a range of films and series but I just felt completely dense listening to the highbrow discussion. Even if I'd seen the whole series, I didn't feel I'd have been able to relate.
I'm worried this is how people see me, a previous ex implied something like this about me and it made me feel inferior.
I do read, I'm reading a book ATM but I'm a slow reader. I can't say I've read every single classic and I follow current affairs, politics etc. But sometimes I just don't feel smart enough.
Not sure if I'm overthinking it?