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Original poster

Heartbroken about DS's teacher

584 replies

Bluetie · 06/07/2024 12:20

DS is a great kid. He's smart, funny, musical and sporty. He is also incredibly polite and has a caring nature. He is always winning awards at school, and is liked by all. DS attends a lovely small school with only 2 year-groups.

His previous teachers were OK but in year 3, he's had the most wonderful teacher, Mr T. Mr T is DS's first male teacher and they also share a hobby. Mr T has really helped DS develop his confidence, pushing him more in academics. DS has had a great year.

DS is now moving to year 4. Mr T is also moving to year 4. But they won't be together. All the classes have been mixed to mix abilities, sexes and SEN.

One morning this week, I went to ask Mr T if this class allocation was final. The head came to join our conversation, and he said he will only move DS for an exceptional reason. The head added that the new teacher has made the best progress in her year group across the whole school. I really want DS to stay with Mr T.

Can anyone think of something?

OP posts:
Original poster
Bluetie · 06/07/2024 12:41

AutismHelp1980 · 06/07/2024 12:39

Ahh OP we have a Mr T too! And he’s been outstanding. I’m thankful for the year my DD has (being assessed for Autism) and he’s been great! She’s come on so much in her confidence.

However, it’s school policy to mix up classes and teachers each year and I don’t question that. It’s good for kids to get to know new people, to be pushed out of their comfort zone. After all nothing stays the same.

Thank you, I'm sure you understand how I feel.

OP posts:
Firebaby · 06/07/2024 12:41

Bluetie · 06/07/2024 12:36

To put things in perspective... DS's year 1 teacher could not spell. Mr T is the best teacher we've had so far.

I can appreciate how sad you feel, genuinely. I had 2 amazing teachers at 2 different years at primary school and was gutted when I moved up a year.... I also have send. But that's literally what every child and parents experience every year they move up.... Its what happens to everyone, everywhere

spanieleyes · 06/07/2024 12:40

@Mostlyoblivious
The child might have developed a wonderful relationship with MrT, but MrT might be relieved to see the back of him, who knows!

TorturedPoetsDepartmentAnthology · 06/07/2024 12:40

It’s quite standard to have a change around of teachers. If not now, eventually your son will have to adapt. Help him adapt and help him learn to be resilient.

2chocolateoranges · 06/07/2024 12:40

You never know, this new teacher may be way better than Mr T.

Give this new teacher a chance.

wildfellhall · 06/07/2024 12:40

I feel your pain.

My son missed out on the brilliant male teacher at the end of primary school and got an NQT with a young baby who was, phoning it in IMO!

So heartbreaking - but thems the breaks unfortunately! I get it though.

Original poster
Bluetie · 06/07/2024 12:40

Not much I can do... I'll just have to find a great present for Mr T for now. Then, next year is another year with another teacher.

OP posts:
honkifyalikebeans · 06/07/2024 12:40

Hes not being punished for being good! What strange reasoning.

Honestly, you're being really unreasonable.

IsItNovember · 06/07/2024 12:40

Bluetie · 06/07/2024 12:38

I don't have any reason to bring to the head to ask for DS to keep the same teacher. So DS is being punished for being good.

Show quote history

So are the rest of class “bad” children then? I’m struggling to understand why you think your DS is being punished.

AutismHelp1980 · 06/07/2024 12:39

Ahh OP we have a Mr T too! And he’s been outstanding. I’m thankful for the year my DD has (being assessed for Autism) and he’s been great! She’s come on so much in her confidence.

However, it’s school policy to mix up classes and teachers each year and I don’t question that. It’s good for kids to get to know new people, to be pushed out of their comfort zone. After all nothing stays the same.

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 06/07/2024 12:39

He’s not being punished 😂
being in a class not taught by the same teacher he has had this year is not in any way shape or form a punishment 😂

Mostlyoblivious · 06/07/2024 12:39

Just tell the school that whilst not classically exceptional in their understanding, you have watched your child flourish and grow into a much happier and confident individual and would hope they would consider allowing him that rare opportunity to grow and flourish further with the continuity of this teacher. It’s not everyday students and teacher develop such a well working relationship, it’s pretty special. Appeal to their hearts, not their rules. Also, if the school has a motto that aligns with this, then there’s always that to add in too

Youcancallmeirrelevant · 06/07/2024 12:39

I've never known kids in primary to have the same teacher, every year is a different teacher as they move up

BrutusMcDogface · 06/07/2024 12:39

IsItNovember · 06/07/2024 12:36

All the classes have been mixed to mix abilities , sexes and SEN

This is how classes have always been done (well in my experience anyway). Folk often ask me why I left teaching and I mostly answer “the parents” jokingly, although I’m not joking when I think of some of outrageous demands made on teaching staff and schools.

I often wonder how some people get through life tbh.

The job would be so much easier and more pleasant if parents trusted teachers to use their professional judgement make decisions like this! I remember moving kids into different maths groups when I was teaching mainstream, and getting a barrage of parents coming in to ask me why! I mean, they shouldn’t even have known or cared what maths group their kid was in, but that seems to be a trend with parents getting unnecessarily involved.

Elle7 · 06/07/2024 12:38

Bluetie · 06/07/2024 12:36

To put things in perspective... DS's year 1 teacher could not spell. Mr T is the best teacher we've had so far.

He’s the best teacher so far….

lovemycbf · 06/07/2024 12:38

BrutusMcDogface · 06/07/2024 12:26

Deal with it? Since when do parents get to decide which teacher their kid has? Your perfect boy isn’t the only kid in that school, you know.

I agree we don't get to pick and choose as it's unrealistic

Original poster
Bluetie · 06/07/2024 12:38

IsItNovember · 06/07/2024 12:37

What do you mean by this?

Show quote history

I don't have any reason to bring to the head to ask for DS to keep the same teacher. So DS is being punished for being good.

OP posts:
PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 06/07/2024 12:38

Mr T is the best teacher we've had so far.

but he is also unlikely to be the best teacher in the country. Maybe Miss X next year will be better…

incognitogenius · 06/07/2024 12:38

What about the other (possibly) 59 children in that year group? Imagine if they all complained? Also you’ve not even given the other teacher a chance, they might be amazing in many different ways!

spanieleyes · 06/07/2024 12:37

Perhaps, just perhaps, the wonderful Mr T doesn't want your darling child ( or indeed many others) in his current class again and, after a year of six hours a day with them, quite fancies a break!

IsItNovember · 06/07/2024 12:37

Bluetie · 06/07/2024 12:27

I feel like DS is being punished for being a good kid.

Show quote history

What do you mean by this?

Original poster
Bluetie · 06/07/2024 12:36

To put things in perspective... DS's year 1 teacher could not spell. Mr T is the best teacher we've had so far.

OP posts:
ThisNoisyTealLurker · 06/07/2024 12:36

My son had a teacher he adored in primary school, was devastated when he had to move years and have a different teacher. Then he adored this new teacher and a year later didn’t want to leave her. He has loved lots of his teachers and hated getting new ones but that’s life and he got over it and yours will too. Try teaching him some resilience, life isn’t fair and that’s just tough tits.

IsItNovember · 06/07/2024 12:36

All the classes have been mixed to mix abilities , sexes and SEN

This is how classes have always been done (well in my experience anyway). Folk often ask me why I left teaching and I mostly answer “the parents” jokingly, although I’m not joking when I think of some of outrageous demands made on teaching staff and schools.

I often wonder how some people get through life tbh.

Fintoo · 06/07/2024 12:36

LibertyDuck · 06/07/2024 12:35

"Heartbroken"?! I genuinely thought that this thread was going to say that the teacher had died!

Me too!