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Is he lying about his salary

62 replies

Askabouttheweather · 05/07/2024 20:11

I have been seeing a guy for a couple of months, very casual. He told me he is a public law and humans rights solicitor, I've checked SRA and he is on there. He claims he makes 130k a year, now tbh I don't care if he does or doesn't but I do care if he is lying.
It is a London based firm, he is 30, not magic/silver circle.
Does this sound likely?

He still lives with his parents, I didn't ask his salary he just told me it and he doesn't seem to have the lifestyle of someone making that much.

If he is lying what's the more likely figure (like has he added 20k or doubled/tripled it.

AIBU to suspect he is lying as his lifestyle doesn't seem to match the salary?

OP posts:
Starseeking · 05/07/2024 20:31

It's entirely possible for a qualified solicitor in London to be on that sort of money.

Assuming he came out of uni at 21, possibly did a one year LPC, joined his firm on a training contract for another 2 years and add a further few years associate experience, it sounds reasonable.

Multi-millionaire boxer Anthony Joshua lived with his Mum in her old council flat for a loooooong time before moving out. It's not a huge red flag if someone likes living with their parents. He could also be saving to buy a decent place, despite him being on a good salary, it won't go far towards a house in London.

I'd be more worried about why you are doubting him so early on in the relationship.

MysteryofNils · 05/07/2024 20:24

It's not unusual by any means

He may just be canny with money

NewMe2024 · 05/07/2024 20:23

Totally possible, and if he is living under his means with a goal in mind (house purchase?) then good for him. I’d be more concerned that you feel the need to doubt / check up on him.

Coffeerum · 05/07/2024 20:21

Jc2001 · 05/07/2024 20:17

I guess you don't fully know his circumstances but if I was earning £130k at 30 years old I wouldn't be living with my parents.

You very well might be in London. At 30 there’s every chance he only recently jumped a pay grade and doesn’t have the large 6 figure deposit he would need to purchase a property on one income.

toomanytonotice · 05/07/2024 20:19

Bananalanacake · 05/07/2024 20:16

I'd assume he is saving up to buy a property if he is still with his parents.

This. Especially in London.

maybe he just doesn’t need to spend that much money? Some people are happy with the basics and saving the rest. Not everyone feels the need to spend all their pay check every month just for the sake of spending it.

mynameiscalypso · 05/07/2024 20:19

If you think he's lying, the relationship is dead really. Doesn't matter if he is or not. You don't trust him.

Jc2001 · 05/07/2024 20:17

I guess you don't fully know his circumstances but if I was earning £130k at 30 years old I wouldn't be living with my parents.

Nanaboots · 05/07/2024 20:17

My sons best friend is about the same age and earns about that maybe a little less but not much

Bananalanacake · 05/07/2024 20:16

I'd assume he is saving up to buy a property if he is still with his parents.

SaltyGod · 05/07/2024 20:16

Seems entirely possible, potentially a little low

Coffeerum · 05/07/2024 20:15

It’s entirely possible to earn that salary by 30 in law.
That doesn’t tell you whether he’s lying or not.
It’s clearly a dead end relationship if you can’t trust him to be honest about his life.

StormingNorman · 05/07/2024 20:14

You’re not unreasonable to think he’s lying. It’s a bit grotty to be asking the internet to work out what he’s earning for you.

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