To kick him out 3 days after he moved in!?

Thank goodness for that! Some people never grow up.

Why do I, all of a sudden, feel like Alice at the tea party, and the tea was straight Glenlivet?

Sorry but why is this so funny to me 😂😂

@YourRubyBee so you are kicking him out basednon him having been ill. You are now ill and haven't given him the chance to actually life and see how it goes when he is healthy? I'm baffled at what's going on but I think perhaps the relationship is damaged now ether way.

@singledadthealmostlegend I think you posted all that on the wrong thread.

Or, you didn't even bother to read what this thread is about.

Wow thank goodness you're here to explain that after 380 posts!

He sounds dreamy 🙃

OP has said: I'm 34 and he is 26.

Her daughters are 15 and 16.

What could possibly go wrong? It's fine until it isn't.

She's old enough to have school-aged children, therefore old enough to know she deserves better.

Hello my lovely people, been a while since my last post so here goes. SD raised my 2 fantastic spawn for 15 years, one now UNI and one in College, PMF . Lets unpick this one. You have never invited him back to yours, not even when the kids are not there, think you need to sort that one out first, way before moving in. Look at what you were scared/concerned about? that's key here. Most people in this type of relationship do a gentle talk to the kids/explain the relationship maybe after 6-9 month being cautious , and if your both on the same page, soft introductions, a walk , ice creams/pizza, a casual outing, then guage both the kids and the slugs reaction. Its going to be a bit harsh if he walks in and spends a few days in bed after a "lads weekend". Not working and can go on a big lash, that's red flag 19. NOW, you're still amazing, kick the lazy Fu£*er out to momies welcoming bosom. love your kids and know you are worth so much fecking more. PS got in from a 4 day lads rugby bender in Dubai at 11pm Brutal, Kids up at 7am and dropped at school, then the day carried on! Love X

You don't need to test which strain of cold you have now.

Back to pre-covid - if you feel ill then stay home if not carry on.

Have you talked about what you both expect from each other once living together?
If you keep cooking meals and delivering them upstairs, he won’t be inclined to start looking after himself. He’s not a mind reader and I find most men will do the bare minimum they can get away with. I would use this opportunity to have a chat about what you will and won’t put up with if you haven’t already.

Just a side note: I was in a similar almost exact situation a few years ago and it blew up. Rumerating about it years forward , I m thinking : THE GIVING OF A FRONT DOOR KEY is A HUGE SYMBOL.. and I could have remembered that when inviting lazy sods into my living space.

Im sorry but you are not in control of what he does snd Im afraid you are not going to be able to control what happens next. Unless hes making some invisible huge contribution ,we cant see then youre going to 'snap' at some point as this behaviour is of a immature adolescent.

The biggest issue here is that you’re at completely different life stages. You’re a 34 year old mum of teens, he’s a 26 year old who lives with his parents and doesn’t work.

By all means have a bit of fun with him but keep him away from your home because this is unlikely to go the distance.

And yes not having to work is great if it’s due to building up his own savings but he’s frittering away an inheritance that should be a massive help with future plans. Hes not thinking ahead and that shows his immaturity and not being ready to settle down with a blended family.

Looks like he wants you to be his second mum 🤷🏼‍♀️ at 26 he should be self sufficient. So I would be leaving him to it.

Can’t imagine dating someone only 10 years older than my kids.

From recent revelations that you now have covid, I think it can be assumed that he had caught it and passed it to you. After almost every holiday I have had since covid, I have caught it.

If you are feeling poorly, theres every chance he felt just as poorly as you, and that might explain the behaviour.

You need to have honest discussions about what is expected re. household etc before moving someone in though.

to not have to work through choice is a positive to me. He's only not working because he's got an inheritance.

I can't help being cynical and thinking he's only stepped up the last few days because he doesn't want to lose the gravy train. I hope I'm wrong.

Hope you feel better soon Op.

Sorry you're full of Covid @YourRubyBee what a nightmare! It sounds like you have a plan now so good luck moving forward, get well soon

This!

Crazy idea.

I'm still laughing at "He has worked everyday since leaving school". He's 26 not 56 😂

While it's nice that he's stepped up because you are ill, you are light years ahead of him in terms of bringing up DC and running a household and quite frankly being an adult; he sounds quite immature and like he's got some growing up to do. Hopefully he'll do that when he goes back to his parents!

That sound a lot more positive @YourRubyBee (apart from you being ill that is!), and I'm glad he's stepped up. It may well be that he had covid as it varies from person to person in how it presents. I had it recently and I didn't have the fever, no sore throat, just a cough and crushing fatigue. I was so lethargic I laid on the sofa for 2 days as it was too hard work sitting up, and I actually went to bed for a nap too (and I never do those things!).