I’m wondering if anyone is in a similar situation and can offer advice? Been married for over 10 years. Overall we’re happy and accept each other for who we are. He’s a good person and I think I am too.
The problem is he doesn’t understand feelings and often can say inappropriate insensitive comments. I tell him he’s hurt my feelings and he apologises, but then he thinks that’s the end of it and just repeats the same behaviours a day or two later.
Normally this doesn’t cause arguments as I know (believe) he can’t help it, and I’m generally easy going, but he’s become worse lately and I’m getting really fed up with him.
He’s recently been diagnosed with a number of health conditions which I know he’s struggling with and I am being supportive. Although he tells me all the time how much he loves me and appreciates me his behaviour and comments contradict this.
I’ve explained this to him and he says in his mind the two things are completely unrelated, he says he is completely unaware of being insensitive and apologises immediately. I’ve said I don’t understand how you can say one thing and then behave in the opposite way, he says he can’t understand how I feel as he doesn’t get it and therefore doesn’t know how to solve the problem.
I don’t know how to move forward, I don’t want to throw away our marriage as it seems silly and we have two children who would be completely distraught (who are also on the autistic spectrum) if we separated. I’m just so tired of feeling unhappy!