To have asked nanny to take her shoes off

This is the second thread I've read tonight about taking shoes of on other people's houses.

This.

The only reason you're fixating on the shoes-off thing OP is because it's on your radar. Who knows why she's not been in touch yet (could be 101 different reasons), but if you're going to go down the route of thinking she doesn't want to work for you, I'd be reflecting more on everything else that was said that day.

I always take my shoes off in other peoples houses. They don't have to in mine as I have laminate downstairs. But I appreciate it when people ask if they should.

This. I recently interviewed and hired an interim nanny and she immediately offered and took her shoes off.

Very, very rude unless you offer house slippers. I wouldn't even have stayed for the interview. Same if I was visiting, if I was asked to take my shoes off and not offered slippers I would leave. Especially if I had no socks, can't think of anything worse than my bare feet on someone else's floor

I’m quite surprised by these comments. Surely it’s normal not to wear shoes indoors especially with 2 small kids, one of which is likely crawling all over the floors? As an experienced childcare provider she should be well aware of that

Exactly. Plus how unhygienic to have dirt from
shoes on your carpet with small children who play and crawl on the floor. A nanny should know that!

It's not precious to want to keep your carpets clean. You may want mud/dirt/dog shit in your carpets but other people don't.

In all my nanny interviews I’ve asked the parents if they’d like me to take my shoes off. Some say yes, if you wouldn’t mind, some say no please don’t worry. People have different preferences. It’s no drama. But if me asking saves this kind of awkwardness and angst I’m happy to do it.

Us shoes-off houses wouldn't want you.

I'd be offended if someone didn't offer to take their shoes off. It's common courtesy to acknowledge some houses are shoes off and to check with the owner.

It’s not so much being precious about carpets and more about hygiene around babies. Babies crawl on the floor and often lick it, you shouldn’t have outdoor shoes on carpets babies will be crawling on, the shoes could have anything on.

Is it a generational thing? My parents think asking someone to take their shoes off is massively rude and they fight me on it every time. Whereas every single one of my friends (all mid 30s) take their shoes off without asking and I always take my shoes off in someone else's house.

Personally, wearing outside shoes in a living room where a 1 year old is playing and rolling around is grim as fuck. I'd expect a nanny to know that.

I would have expected to be pre- warned I would need to take shoes off.

You didn't do anything wrong. If that has put her off the you've dodged a bullet as frankly you'd be walking on eggshells trying to avoid upsetting her re other things.

But surely a huge portion of Nannies work with shoes off?! If it’s a shoes off house they will be included in that.

If she doesn’t want to remove her shoes for an interview as a nanny in the home she would be working in then she probably isn’t for you. I think shoes inside are a bit yuk too. It’s not about being finicky- in fact with children who are possibly going to tread in dog shit it’s an even more sensible rule. I too am not a house proud sort but unless you are staying on my wooden floor and for a brief visit (or need to keep them on because you are a tradie) then they are coming off. Even my elderly neighbour offers when he comes in.

Completely normal for someone working permanently in your home to be following the same rules as the rest of the house. A nanny surely would be entirely used to that?!
But you are making assumptions that is why she hasn’t got back to you!

Yeah I'm not sure that would make me feel very enthusiastic about a job opportunity. You're within your rights to ask. But equally she's within her rights to factor that into her decision.

It's done now, no point in dwelling too much on it.

She may have simply not relished the prospect of working all day with no shoes. No reason to imagine she was ""offended""

I wouldn’t get back to you if I was her but I’m Irish and think removing your shoes when entering a house is a load of nonsense. My partner’s daughters are English and think it’s normal.

I’m completely shoes off and take slippers when I go visiting but this…

Shoes on/off threads tend to be fairly evenly divided on MN.

At the end of the day, it's perfectly reasonable for you to ask, and perfectly reasonable for her to decide it's not somewhere she wants to work (whether for that reason or any other).

I've got no problem removing my shoes in anybody's house and always do.
But I would be thinking he's going to be a bit arsey. I wouldn't have said it then but I would have said that you expect her to take her shoes off and to wear slippers if she wanted.

When I worked for a care company we had to keep our shoes on for insurance sake.

It makes sense that you removed your shoes in your own house, less sense that you would automatically expect a stranger to do so, without informing her first.

Was she also waiting for you while you were out walking for a pre-arranged interview? Were you late even by 5 mins or so or was she early perhaps?

However, seems like you need to interview someone else.

I wouldn't take my shoes off going into a strangers house. I wouldn't take them off in a workplace either.