To have asked nanny to take her shoes off

Just how amazing are your carpets?
I always think flooring is there for people. People are not there for flooring.
She was there for an interview, he should have put her at her ease.

"People that tend to enforce such rules are people with other very alternative perceptions, obviously not everyone but I’d avoid like the plague…."

This. Firstly I would not expect to remove my shoes at an interview. Secondly, I would presume you were a fussy pair of buggers and that this was only the tip of the iceberg.

What? Looking after children is absolutely a job you can do barefoot (when inside), millions of parents do it every day

I would feel uncomfortable if I didn't ask every time I go to someone's house, even though it never crosses my mind in my own house.

If this person is going to be looking after two young children they are going to be on their feet a LOT.

It’s unreasonable to expect someone to work a physical job barefoot or in slippers - its bad for the feet and can lead to serious long term injury and pain. If you have hard floors anywhere in the house it’s also dangerous for her to wear socks or tights without shoes. Slippers can also be a major tripping hazard if they are loose.

You should have had proper shoe covers ready or made a point of asking her to bring indoor only shoes if she were to work for you. Having friends round to sit shoeless on your couch is not the same as someone working 8 hours a day on their feet in your home.

Horrible!

FWIW if I invited a stranger to my home where they might be the more vulnerable (by virtue of age, numbers, whatever) I would understand if they wanted to keep shoes on, keep their bag close, etc. And I would hope if I was putting myself in a vulnerable position in someone else’s home they’d be alive to that fact and make accommodations.

What exactly do you think is going to happen if I come into your house without removing my shoes? Surely I'm bringing in microscopic germs on my bare feet or socked feet anyway. Why would my shoes be any worse?

Never again will I take my shoes off in somebody's house in a work setting. Last time I did this I didn't realise that the client had a badly trained house rabbit. Standing in rabbit droppings barefoot is not an experience I ever want to repeat!

That's a bit of an overstatement and quite offensive. Do you ask your visitors to wash their hands as they enter your house or issue them with plastic gloves to wear? Or ask them to slip on a gown so that their bums, which may have sat on a bus seat, or a seat in a taxi used by people you don't know, doesn't pass germs on to the sofa where your DC may sit?

That wasn't the question. The poster said "There's a weird thing on mumsnet where people think asking people to take shoes off when you're a no-shoe household, is somehow odd and rude." I had hoped other people had enough understanding of other people's views and upbringing to understand that many people feel it is rude to ask a guest to remove their shoes.

If taking off her shoes has put off her I think you've had a lucky escape she's obviously not for you. Wearing shoes indoors is disgusting.

True, OP could be a terrible employer. Good was only in the context of a job that the nanny thought worth applying to. There could be a couple of reasons why she could say no and that is absolutely her prerogative. In the scheme of things, asking someone to take off shoes is a minor thing to say no. And if it bothers the nanny, that is something she can clarify when discussing the job terms, salary etc.

My mother and father are in their 80s and we were always a shoes off household. Unheard of by you possibly. I think it was a hangover from growing up where the jobs were mill/mine/farm. All those jobs you wouldn't let someone in the house treading coal dust and soil everywhere!

I would think it so strange if I was asked to remove my shoes for a job interview! It would definitely put me off. I've never been asked to remove my shoes in someone else's home, and I almost always keep my shoes on at home too due to an ankle injury that would be made worse by walking barefoot for any length of time.
The only time I would automatically remove my shoes when getting home would be if it was my hiking boots and they had gotten muddy. As a rule I manage to avoid stepping in mud and dog poop when I'm out and about.

"So dirty to wear outside shoes indoors and uncomfortable, just wear slippers"

But as the nanny wasn't warned in advance that it was a shoes off house, she wasn't prepared, and didn't bring slippers. Most people don't go about their daily business carrying a spare pair of slippers. Unless you're suggesting that the hosts should have offered slippers - which, frankly, I think is hideous and way more unhygeinic than outside shoes being worn inside - who knows who has worn them before, and whether they had Athlete's foot, verrucas, warts, or other disgusting infections?

I'm always happy to respect a shoes off rule when visiting, but I draw the line at wearing manky slippers when I don't know who has worn them before.

It might be a real life thing but it is weird. I thought people have enough understanding of other people's cultures to not be offended at being asked to remove shoes.

If she's offended by a perfectly reasonable request to take her shoes off in someone's home then you had a lucky escape.

It’s not a “weird thing on mumsnet”, it’s a real-life thing. Can you not accept that people have different opinions?

Totally agree. Depending on the job, this is a real health and safety issue.

This is a bit unfair. Firstly, how do you know it is a "good job"? The T&Cs aren't mentioned. Maybe that's what put her off, and it's nothing to do with the shoes-off rule? Secondly, if the prospective employee feels strongly about having to take her shoes off, then it's not silly to refuse the job - it's common sense. People feel differently about things. Just because someone views a request differently to you, it doesn't make it silly.

I suffered from PF for years and, while it's much improved, I still get flare ups now and again if I wear dead flat shoes, like flip flops or ballet pumps, or go barefoot for any length of time.

It's also one of the reasons why I hate shoes-off houses.

I've lived in my house for 31 years and despite wearing outdoor shoes indoors, I have never, ever had dogshit on my carpets.

I'm cringing at all these people who walk in dogshit, tbh. Why don't they just look where they're walking?

I'm not a Nanny, but if I were I wouldn't be keen. Young dc and carpet don't mix, I'd worry you were precious about the carpet and thunk it was just too much faff. Good Nannies are so in demand they can choose their standards.

Shoegate would be irrelevant to me. I prefer the people I work with to be professional enough to reply promptly to important emails. Her lack of a timely response is what would have pissed me off by now. Whatever people say, nobody is too busy to write a short but polite response. Even if just to say they need more time to think.