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AIBU?

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To refuse to send DS12 to detention

109 replies

AlwaysTheGoodGirl · 02/07/2024 14:22

I know everyone thinks their kid is perfect, but mine is super-conscientious, and every day he comes in from school saying most of the kids just mess about and break things all day and all he wants to do is get on with his work.

Anyway, his class have been given detention tomorrow after school, and the teacher (supply teacher as far as I can tell) has sent a really angry-sounding explanation for the detention. I know DS is going to be gutted about losing his 100% positive points record more than anything. He's been invited to an awards evening next week for achieving 100% positive points, so I know this is going to cloud it for him. And me! I'm gutted too!

Is it any good ringing the school to complain, or is this just a suck it up situation?

OP posts:
Cantileveredy · 02/07/2024 14:35

Dd school is somoalr and she has no behaviour poonts. Shes asd and says if she gets any she will start to mess about all the time.
Y6 there were sen kids but her class was nothing like secondary.

EarthlyNightshade · 02/07/2024 14:32

CherieBabySpliffUp · 02/07/2024 14:25

Is this an all class detention for bad behaviour? If so, sorry he has a long standing appointment that you can't (and won't) change. Which you don't need to show proof of as it's outside of the school day.

In our school, this would move the detention to another day, or if he was lucky, he wouldn't have to do it - but it would still be on his behaviour record.
It sounds like the behaviour record is what OP is most upset about.

I would suck it up I think, but I would email the school about your thoughts on whole class detentions - things must have been really bad if the teacher couldn't pick out a few particular disrupters and give the detention to them. I'd be really unhappy about missing out on an award because of the whole class.

What does DS want to do? Mine would rather do the detention than be the only one to get out of it.

AlwaysTheGoodGirl · 02/07/2024 14:30

This was the explanation given. It's exactly what I hear every day. The Y7 kids seem to be out of control and it's really putting DS off school 😕

OP posts:
AlwaysTheGoodGirl · 02/07/2024 14:29

Type: 40 Minute Date: 03/07/2024 Note: Virtually the whole class refused to follow any instructions Had to be brought back to classroom from ILC for messing about noise levels through the roof. Defiance from most. Back door opened without permission. fire fighting at all times then it would start somewhere else

OP posts:
delilabell · 02/07/2024 14:25

Our school banned class detentions. They said that it was just am easy option for teachers who couldn't control the class.
I would phone the school and ask if they have evidence of poor behaviour from your son in particular

CherieBabySpliffUp · 02/07/2024 14:25

Is this an all class detention for bad behaviour? If so, sorry he has a long standing appointment that you can't (and won't) change. Which you don't need to show proof of as it's outside of the school day.

Lalalacrosse · 02/07/2024 14:25

But if it’s mass punishment where he was not himself misbehaving - I’d complain and point out that the only reason that used to work was that the innocent ones would take the bad ones round the back of the bike sheds and ‘impress upon them’ why they behaviour was not ok.

One assumes that the school does not intend to endorse that approach.

Peacecomesdroppingslow · 02/07/2024 14:24

Why was the detention given?

Lalalacrosse · 02/07/2024 14:23

What did he actually do?

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