To be so fucking angry

Apparently they are often rejected and you just need to appeal.

Sorry to make this political but under Labour we had an almighty battle to secure a specialist school for my younger brother. This has been going on for decades.

Are you still within the appeal window?

Just to throw in that if you decide to apply for an EHCP yourself, have a look at SENDIASS and IPSEA as these are both organisations that can advise on the process and your rights. There’s also a local Facebook group for my area full of very savvy and helpful parents who have already been down this road - if you search EHCP + [your county/local authority], you might find something similar. Good luck.

This sounds so stressful for you. It is a disgrace how SEN children are treated in this country. It’s unfair on the pupil, the parents and the teachers. I’m sorry I have no useful advice - I would go back to GP as a first port of call.

You would be better starting another thread in the SN section and getting fab help from the wise MN'ers there.

I'm sorry but you do sound quite clueless. You are going to have to wise up very quickly, play the game and contact everybody that needs contacting. and take notes and follow things up with email and chase and chase because the whole system is very hard work but you really need to wise up and play the game.

Make an appointment to see the GP. apply for the EHCP yourself. Immediately. make an appointment to see the head and the senco. get all your paperwork and everything from the nursery that you need.

you need to utilise everybody you can, chase and chase and chase again and again, you're never gonna get anywhere unless you treat this as though you were an investigator or a cop and dealing with a case.

You need an ehcp for special school, the la have even turned down assessment of his needs so he hasn’t even been assessed for an ehcp never mind been awarded one stating special school required

Not if it’s our la they won’t, assessments are currently taking over 52 weeks, they were in special needs jungle hall of shame, they just ignore the pre action letters from ipsea now, there’s very little you can do about it that doesn’t also tske a long time. Plus the wait for appeal is now about 10 months

If you are planning to not send him in don’t take him off the register. As long as he is on their register they will be trying to find solutions. A lot of schools have unofficial units based in school funded by EHCP money from other students. Ask around and find out if there is anything. The EHCP system means they have to show they’ve tried everything, sometimes non attendance will mean an EHCP is rejected which is a catch 22. I’m angry on your behalf.

It sounds like forcing your child into school is traumatizing him. The LA are really bad but in the short term you have to stop forcing your poor child into school of that is what's happening to him when he's there.

Genuine question.
Even with a EHCP in place, is it still possible that a school genuinely still could accommodate a child with complex needs? Can schools be forced to accept a child?
I really wish the best for your son @Crystallizedring but still think he's possibly just too young for school, bearing in mind his age/the age you said he is functioning at.
Are there any special schools within travelling distance? Would that be more realistic for him?
Sorry if any of these questions are naive, I'm honestly just trying to think what is the most realistic plan for him, and those around him, to thrive.

So sorry you are going through this OP.
My step daughter went through the same with her son, but the LA wouldn't help before the school agreed they couldn't cater for his needs, he was there for 1 week before they could no longer cater for him, and he was then put onto a waiting list for a school that could cater for him and his additional need.

It was a stressful time, but it all worked out in the end and he is in a fantastic school now and thriving, hang in there.

@Summerpigeon

That’s a lovely post. This is exactly what is making me angry. The EHCP process and ASD diagnosis is casting a huge cloud of negativity, exclusion, rejection, misunderstanding, being labelled ‘atypical’ : over my child who is beautiful, unique and generally very happy (until we all try to squash him in to a world where adults decide what is normal).
He loves bubbles, lining up cars, stacking bricks, running in a field : and tbh I think his world is much better than the one I’m trying to fit him into. I’d rather live in his world.

Once you have a new mp later this week absolutely contact them.

Ehcp can name the school which is best for the child which is super helpful for admissions etc.

Hope you get help soon op 💐

Bit late for that as it's already been done and refused. OP needs to appeal.

Primary school governor here . Firstly ( and frustratingly for schools ) it’s not unusual for children to turn up at primary school when they clearly need an EHCP . This is especially frustrating when it takes so long to put one in place and schools budgets are limited . once school is involved they will get the ball rolling .

I think it’s also worth you making an appointment with the SENDCo to chat through stuff before term ends . difficult doesn’t mean impossible . There are a range of strategies that can be employed . Given your son has an EHCP already - even if it needs to be updated - he is already in the system . At our school there is an option when you ring in to leave a message for the SENDCo but otherwise go through the school office .

. at our school we still try and ensure we meet the needs of these children even without the formal EHCP . I have to say some schools are much better than others at providing the best environment for children with additional needs. Some schools near us are famously unwelcoming because it does cost schools financially and can impact SATS league tables

good luck .

Agree that an EHCP can be a poisoned challis. There is a way they are ‘supposed’ to work, but there is not sufficient funding to ensure they work that way/incompetence etc.

I’m fully expecting the same attempt at exclusion when he changes school at KS2.
It’s impossible to speak to his case worker, emails are never answered.

There is a great account on TikTok called The autism adventure. A wonderfully eloquent man who posts about this life with his son. I know he advises families and has been fighting to advocate for his son.
Join and have a look.

I'm sorry they are trying to shove your gorgeous child into this school which is clearly not appropriate.
I'm angry as well. You have every right to be fuming.

You must appeal. Do that today.

Have a meeting with school. Find out how they plan to care for your son whilst he is there....

I'm in a similar position. My 10year old is in y5 and to be honest his entire primary education has been a shit show. He is still doing Y1 reading and phonics. He is autistic with specific learning difficulties. He can barely write. He has an EHCP and I am gearing up to have the biggest fight of our lives next year to get him in to a specialist secondary school. Case worker is already playing silly buggers with the Senco over when we can have his transition review. I'm resigned to the fact I'll be going to tribunal and we are saving up for this eventuality.

I'll be writing to my MP about it all (this helped when we applied for his EHCP too-we got seen by an EP two weeks after I complained to MP).

Fight for the EHCP and, I don't want to be a negative Nelly, start working on accepting that once you have the EHCP you will have to keep fighting...I thought once we got an EHCP that all would be rosy but actually it isn't....I'm sad to say there's a new issue most of the time.

@Crystallizedring

Yes you have every right to be angry. The whole system is woefully underesourced and underfunded - with schools barely able to keep their head above water.

Just a different angle - my son was awarded an EHCP this time last year, which meant a different application process for reception (his mainstream application was null and void after being granted an EHCP.)

One school outright rejected, another school attempted the same. I thought he would have no school place at all - hadn't even started considering a specialist school (which have long waiting lists, long travel time, few and far between in our area).

After a week of fighting and crying he got a mainstream place.

In retrospect, I’d have made sure he had a school place before getting an EHCP. In my experience, schools can use them to exclude children.

Children with SEN are let down time and time again - it makes my piss boil too @Crystallizedring so YANBU

As I understand it, you have to push water up a mountain to get the assessment done which for working parents is impossible. IDK if there are charities that specialise in providing this support, but its worth a look. The school should also support you.

It made me laugh when parents were critical of education during covid, so many complained to me until I said welcome to the workd of parents with kids with disabilities - almost all of whom do not achieve what they could becayse of how they are educated or not as the case mainly is.

Sending a hug xxx

My eldest was like this and we struggled with school for a year and now we home educate and it's been transformative for him. Not saying you should or that it's even possible for you but it is something we had never considered previously.

The council refuses automatically, at every step. It’s not personal, just process. Heartbreaking but you have to kick down a door at each step to get anywhere. Find a charity locally to guide you and don’t take no for an answer.

Every council is similar but Labour councils doing this feels like a betrayal. Heartless.

A slightly different thing, but when I worked for the Benefits Agency years ago, if someone was not getting what they thought they should they would threated to go straight to the Secretary of State. As soon as one of those letters arrived everyone started jumping around and things happened.

I'm not saying this will help you, but I don't think it would hurt.

I had similar
My ds was diagnosed with autism age 3
I couldn't actually get a school to take him,quite a few just said they couldn't meet need
Which In hindsight I was grateful for their honesty
Because when one did take him ,I was so pathetically grateful ,I didn't remove him quick enough when they labelled him a naughty boy said he didn't need an ehcp ..then they expelled him
Most of his schooling was me home educating him and a few useless tutors the LEA threw in occasionally.
It was a nightmare,even after getting the ehcp , nothing improved untill around age 18 where I fought to get him in a private college with one to one tutoring
He now has very good GCSEs and science and maths A levels at BBC grades .
My enjoyment of having him ,was ruined ,not by his autism
But by the education system,that didn't care and was neglectful from teachers through to the top of the LEA ,it's rotten right through.
The 20 years of dealing with these people has left us both traumatized.
As my son is now 25 ,I had hoped things had improved
But the more I read and see and hear ...it's actually getting worse
And I don't recall one politician having talked about this ,and how they will improve it ,come Thursday

THIS!