AIBU to be upset about children’s services calling about child hurt at school not home?

Yes it’s an assault.

Genuine accidents don’t get referred, (can you imagine if every child with a broken arm needed a referral?) unless it was something that could have been prevented such a burn or something where the child should have been supervised, any assault and anything non-accidental, or anything suspicious.

If they told you they were going to start safeguarding, then that’s what they meant by referring to social care. Maybe it wasn’t clear enough.

Oh behave
This isn't a child who is unable to repay the details of an incident, this is a teenager who was no doubt quite capable of explaining for themself. Don't twist it to fit the NHS can do no wrong ever narrative. They can do wrong and do, frequently.

By trying to fit the agenda that they are always right, you damage the whole enterprise. Every sector needs to be held to account so it can improve.

Frankly it's the constant battle to keep staff who should be retrained or sacked that has led to the rot in the first place.

If Children's services continued to be involved it can speed up referrals for other things, or they can signpost you to other services. They can also make sure the school and police investigate properly.

It feels like that but honestly don’t worry.

The responsibility to report is taken more seriously by different doctors, and they have different views on what counts as a ‘safeguarding concern’- remember hey are experts in the medical field not in safeguarding.

You probably just got one who reports everything just in case, then the duty team have to action the report even though they can see it’s unnecessary.

The action was ringing you and making a note that it’s nothing!

Great idea - make nhs staff worry about reporting cases where they suspect children may be at risk. Brilliant plan. Definitely.

Social services aren't the parenting police.

They are there to support children and families keep children safe.

Their role here is to establish what happened to understand whether they need to support anyone involved.

They will talk to the health professionals, school. police, you, the other family.

They don't need anyone's permission. GDPR doesn't apply here. And all these services will share info.

Please don't worry about it. Everyone is doing their jobs. Including you supporting your son.

Wow! It's not 'some jumped up NHS person'. It's their job. They have processes they are required to stick to. They are there for the safety of all children.

Perhaps there has been an issue you are unaware of, with a number of children being assaulted at that school. Maybe they are checking for systematic bullying.

It isn't personal. It's a process to protect your child. I'd be grateful it exists and is working in your area.

This is not true.

When I took DS to be x-rayed they asked where the injury occurred. When I said school, the receptionist put it down as educational something or other.

The recommendation is always that parents / guardians are informed at the time of the safeguarding referral, unless doing so would actually place the child at risk. But in practice, if you'd have left the department and then the decision was made after, it's unlikely someone will call you because they will be too busy or the time is antisocial etc. Or it can be simply overlooked or even avoided because staff find it so uncomfortable (obviously that isn't good practice but I think for some staff groups with less experience or authority they are honestly scared of or don't know how to have the conversation, especially if they're very busy / rushed).

That's no problem. It is really stressful and unsettling. It will be okay though. I hope you feel reassured that this is not about someone being suspicious of you.

I actually wonder if the person you saw might have not intended to refer, perhaps because they weren't concerned at all by the presentation (and therefore didn't warn you about the referral) but then someone else reviewing the paperwork, or supervising in some capacity, has triggered the process, without ever even meeting you. The system by design removes all barriers to anybody with any level of concern from submitting a referral. It's then for social services to very quickly assess and dismiss as appropriate - a safety net.

There have been times I wouldn't refer, but my consultant thinks we should, so we do. Referral is usually just like getting a second opinion even though you're pretty happy there's nothing to worry about. It's about "what if?" and also keeping sources of information as broad as possible. We would not actually allow a child to leave the hospital if there was felt to be an immediate threat to their safety at home.

I would presume they are doing their job and putting the child first and not parents sensitivities

Also remember that the safeguarding process is not there to investigate YOU, but all people (and organisations) that could be hazardous to your son. For example if this assault had been serious, and the other child continued to pose a threat to your son, the involvement of a social worker could be a great asset to you in prompting the school to manage / address that risk and keep your son safe.

Of course this situation is personal to you, but it is not personal to the referrer. They are aware that if further preventable harm came to your son, after attending AE because of an assault, the explanation "I didn't follow the due process because his mum seemed really nice" would be unforgivable.

The process is not "refer if you get a bad feeling about the mum", rather "follow these objective, mandatory criteria". What I suspect could have been done better, is informing you of the referral and reassuring you about it being mandatory and totally routine, in the AE department. You should not have been left with the unpleasant surprise of a social worker calling. But, people are very rushed these days and it's possible a less experienced member of staff was prompted to make the mandatory referral by a senior, after you had already left.

Edit: you're right that presenting to AE with no significant injury just for a check up, is of course, a context that is very reassuring. That is why only a low key kind of follow up has happened (just a phone around various involved parties to further establish what happened and I expect the matter will be closed v quickly). The phone calls are really just a further opportunity for someone (including you) to speak up if something concerning was going on. The threshold for these things is really very low, much lower than actually having a suspicion of something untoward.

You could do a subject access request with social work and children’s services.

We don’t need permission to phone school, GPs, the police, health visitors, school nurses, or any professional dealing with children.

We should and do, talk to each other. It’s partly how we recognise when people are making up stories.

If a child has been injured in an assault, I will always refer this to safeguarding. Always. It's my professional and legal duty to do this and the whole point is that no value judgement of the child / their family is being made because the referral is mandatory. It's for the social worker to follow up and establish facts, context etc that could be missed if the only assessment was the one made in AE. If a social worker is going to follow up on the safety of a child who has been assaulted, of course they have to speak to that child's parents and they're likely to speak to them first - would you really want it any other way?

I do appreciate this is a really horrible thing to experience and you may feel like you're being questioned or doubted. Actually this is routine and a child who has been assaulted will always be referred, even if their parent gives a watertight account of an event happening at school with another child. Unfortunately the alternative of not following up has been shown, time and time again, to result in the preventable further injury and even death of children.

You might have said that this event happened at school and a very superficial investigation materialises that your son didn't attend school on the day of the assault and is in fact involved in county lines, or was assaulted by your partner who has a previous conviction for assault of a minor etc etc. Sadly there are very nice-seeming, likeable people who will in fact lie convincingly to professionals who then don't follow due process. That's exactly what has happened in several high profile cases ending in tragedy.

One way I phrase this to families is "10 safe and well cared for children may have to endure this invasive and upsetting process so that 1 child who isn't safe can be identified and protected". Your engagement with this process might not be necessary to protect your son but having a universal process is going to protect another child.

I hope that your son is recovering well and this is behind you soon.