We moved from a big city just over a year ago as my OH has always wanted to live outside the city. We were meant to wait until our DC had finished school, but he found the house of his dreams before that and bought it. DC have now finished school and myself, OH and youngest DC (18) live here.
Problem is, my job is still in the city, some 80 miles away, so I spend 2 or 3 days a week in the office and stay away from home when I do, with a relative. OH is ALWAYS making digs about this and asking why I can’t just work from home. I have to attend the office for meetings and 100% WFH is not an option.
He causes an argument about this on a regular basis and this weekend he started an argument two evenings in a row, mainly because I have to attend the office 4 days this week. The second evening I stayed very calm, but he swore at me, punched a door and wall and smashed the iron into the ironing board, breaking it!
He says I don’t care about his feelings, but my job hasn’t moved! He has moved us. I said if we had stayed in the city I would be home every night, so this is his doing.
I told him I was going to leave due to his aggressive behaviour and he apologised, but then blamed me for starting the argument and said I was overreacting as he wasn’t aggressive to me, just the walls and furniture! (He did twist my arms trying to get the car keys off me and threw my bag).
I try very hard to ensure I only do 2 or 3 days a week in the office, to keep him happy, but this isn’t always possible.
Also, prior to Covid I used to work 4 days a week in the office, now it is normally 3 or less, and he wants me to drop it further.
I have a good job and I earn good money, I am at least 10 years away from retiring, but even if I was to retire in a year, I don’t think it would be good enough for him
It was his dream to move and I went along with that but I never said I would give up work so I don’t understand why he is like this.