To not want to ‘sit in the park’ on a second date?

I think it sounds lovely but we're all different. I couldn't be with an extravagant or high-maintenance man.

I agree that these replies are really interesting.

Something that I would find a nice idea, others are absolutely horrified at.
Which is something I never would have considered and makes me nervous about OLD.

I personally want you to go on the date as is, just so you can update us! lol

I find it a guy offers a coffee or something similar and low cost for a second date they are either seeing lots of women for second dates or they are careful with money; that's my experience. It then becomes a matter for you, going for a walk to a park and onto dinner would fit in my lifestyle, a sandwich on a park bench wouldn't. For me it would be disappointing.

Reply and ask which one of you is bringing the white lightening cider.

@LookOverHere

What types of parks are near you? I think that's a very relevant question. No need to be outing, but are there any with nice features, places to have a drink or food etc? A lot of people responding have said "depends on the park".

Me personally, it's not something I'd be keen on. I'm not a park person so we wouldn't be compatible if that's something my date would like. I like hiking and country walks but I just don't enjoy parks.

It does seem low effort but if he has more planned than just sitting on a bench, it might not be. Hard to tell but please do report back!

Whether it was in London or Mars it would still be daft to explain the park to a local. Also you were listing your objections in response to a post about London parks...

Has OP said she lives in London?

@Melisha that's most parks around here. Surely it would be a bit daft to have to explain the park to OP, if she lives in the area?

Also most London parks are absolutely crawling with people in the evenings in summer. You can't find a quiet spot. Believe me, I've tried 😂

This is not a generic park. If someone was suggesting a date there they would have said shall we go to X park - it has lovely nature reserves and a lovely pub.
It sounds lovely, but I would have said no as I would be worried it would be too isolated in parts. Second date is still meeting in a busy public place territory.

Yeah you see my local park has: a coffeeshop, 2 nature reserves, a wild section, a managed landscaped section, natural ponds, a man made lake, oast houses. It's linked by paths with another park with Victorian grottos, follies and natural springs and has some of London's oldest trees and that other park is linked to a little town on some ponds with an insane pub to resident ratio

Yes definitely report back. See how it goes. It might be better than expected.

This thread is actually quite fascinating to see all the different opinions about what makes a good date.

@Putting if you only have two parks in your town I can see why that would be the case. Most places have a variety of parks.
My local park does have a small cafe. But it is a place to pay and two cheap tables and chairs outside. It is not a destination, but somewhere elderly people sit down for a rest, or dog walkers take a break. But it is most used by parents to get a takeaway coffee they take to the playground. I would not go there as a destination.

It depends where you live, though. Both parks in my relatively small town have proper cafes.

He did not suggest a visit to a pub or restaurant. He also did not suggest a visit to a cafe in a park. He literally said sit in a park.
Lots of parks have takeaway coffee stands. Only very large ones have proper cafes.

A park date could be nice if the sun is shining, there are nice places to walk/sit and have a coffee or something. It's a nice way to get to know someone without feeling the pressure of sitting through a proper meal.

It's his wording of sitting in the park that's not making it sound appealing. If that's literally all he is thinking of doing I wouldn't be interested at all but maybe he's worded it wrong. Seems odd though, why not suggest a walk and a coffee/ice cream if that's what he really means. Plus does he have a backup plan incase it's raining.

It all all suggests no effort but I think personally I would clarify and give him the benefit of the doubt. I'm often guilty of not making myself clear, in my head I know what I mean and I forget that other people don't know that.

I do think OLD is hard, for me I need to know the person first and that's when I'll often feel something more over time and that is when a lot of relationships develop organically. So it could be worth giving him a shot and seeing how things go. It could turn out to be the best date you've ever had or it could be a flop but you won't know until you give it a go.

At least it is not busy!

Most surprising thing about this thread on normally posh Mumsnet is the number of posters who live only within reach of a patch of frosty Jack soaked, needle littered scrub.

It's grim up North London 😂

I prefer outdoors so that would work for me 🤷‍♀️

Maybe it'll be Prince's Park in Burntwood

Because I assumed he'd pick a nice park for a date rather than a shit one, but you might be right. He might have meant a shit one.

Depends where you live I guess. In London most of the larger parks have some form of cafe inside them or failing that you are a short distance to a pub or restaurant. I guess context is everything. Visiting the local dog shit stewn park and sitting on some graffiti covered bench with surly teenagers nearby smoke weed is not exactly the date of dreams. A leisurely stroll through Hyde Park before grabbing lunch at Kensington Roof Gardens or culminating in a thoughtfully prepared picnic is slightly different.

@gamerchick I am sure that is the way the conversation will go.