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Original poster

To think having to walk away from my baby crying is the hardest thing I’ve had to do

86 replies

justmymonday · 01/07/2024 08:15

Bloody hate nursery drop off

OP posts:
Frozensun · 01/07/2024 09:07

I remember this so well. My child is now a mother herself. I was so upset. The centre director said - go around the corner and wait a couple of minutes. Don’t let her see you and have a look at her. I did - and she was happily playing with a toy!! No sign of tears. Literally 2 minutes! She was ok and then so was I.

Wednesday6 · 01/07/2024 09:01

It's heart breaking and hopefully they'll settle in soon..

HAF1119 · 01/07/2024 09:01

It will get easier

For every day of tears at drop off she's finding her feet at nursery, learning independence and making friends.

I totally get how hard it is I did it when mine was young too - but he still has friends from nursery 2 years after he left. After a few months he was happy when he saw the staff, and after around 6 months he was so excited to go through the door I didn't even get a wave (which broke my heart in a whole different way)

It is so had to not be the one to calm the tears, but it's nessesary, and whilst neither option is 'better' your child will gain a little network of trusted adults who can soothe and calm the tears at every fall until you pick her up again. Those initial tears are all part of her growing bonds with the adults who will hopefully care for her until nursery ends and in time it will all start to feel really positive :)

ConfusedKoala13 · 01/07/2024 08:33

It is heartbreaking OP - for me child 1 was happy as larry going into nursery from very young so it was a complete shock when child 2 was less keen. Tbh she's still not massively keen now and she's 9, I think it's just personality. But there are many times I have bawled my eyes out in the car on the way to work and it felt so much worse when they were tiny and didn't have the words for their feelings.
Breathe and it's OK to find it hard.

Original poster
justmymonday · 01/07/2024 08:29

Oh and sorry - she’s not quite 1 and this is only her second week. So of course we’re still adapting.

OP posts:
Original poster
justmymonday · 01/07/2024 08:28

Hope so. My life has been easy in some ways: I’ve been fortunate enough to be born into a developed country, had education, food, material needs met. I have suffered loss and bereavement. This is hard because I feel I’m doing it to her. I’m choosing to leave her when she’s unhappy. Of course it is more nuanced than that. It’s really upset me this morning. Thanks for the kind words.

OP posts:
Mouswife · 01/07/2024 08:27

It’s so hard OP, I have been there. This will eventually subside and I bet your little on has a ball playing with others once you have gone and they are settled.

Jewelanemone · 01/07/2024 08:25

It's hard for you but, as an ex nursery worker, I can almost guarantee your little one will stop crying almost as soon as he/she can't see you any more ❤️. Ring the nursery a bit later to see how they're doing - they won't mind updating you and it'll put your mind at rest.

maybein2022 · 01/07/2024 08:25

Floralsofa · 01/07/2024 08:23

You must have had an easy life thus far.

This is so uncalled for.

OP- it is heartbreaking to leave your baby crying but he/she will be ok. How old are they and how long have they been going? Do they go full time? Big hugs.

Floralsofa · 01/07/2024 08:23

You must have had an easy life thus far.

CatMumSlave · 01/07/2024 08:22

I only did it from age 3 onwards as I didn't work.

At least you're earning money to give your little one a good life.