Is there any point of losing weight?

I gained about 3 stone in the 2 years after my DS was born from my ore pregnancy weight. It wasn't due to having a baby, I had let myself eat and drink too much. I was able to lose most of it before becoming pregnant again. It's down to eating too much and not exercising enough after several years.

Sigh @Killingoffmyflowersonebyone
BMI is a useful took for about 90% of the population. Most of us aren't bodybuilders or athletes at the top of our game, so I would suggest that BMI means very little to about 10% of the population.

There always the assumption on here that if a man puts weight on, it's because he's lazy, but a woman can't help it- especially if she's had kids.

I'm 5'9 and usually between 68 and 70kg. 70 is heavy for me and I'd be looking to sort myself out. I would expect my dh to tell me if I was getting bigger and hadn't noticed. Just like I do with him.

2 stone overweight. 4 stone heavier than her prepregnancy normal.

OP says she has put on 25 kg, thats right. Perhaps have a modicum of understanding of what you're talking about.

4 stone is over 25KG. That would make OP underweight by your argument.

Forgive me if I can’t take you seriously when you’re advocating for someone to be unhealthily skinny.

M&S have a serious issue with vanity sizing. There sizes are huge

I'm a bit heavier than Op carrying most of my weight on my belly and bum. Guaranteed size 16 in M&S

I bought a 16 shirt style dress from Next / Fatface it's pulling at top. Really I should return it for an 18. But...I don't want to go up another size. Can I drop enough to fit comfortably in it in 4 weeks???

We all know carrying extra weight isn't good, either looks or health. But we also know it's rude to comment.

Ops DH has a point, whichever way you look at it. Maybe the answer is they have a pact to get fitter and healthier together. Easier to get the steps in and the motivation to go to the gym if you have someone to go with you.

I think, op, you might need to rely on something slightly more scientific than “what dress size am I in M&S?”

Bring overweight (and you Are very close to obese) is bad for anyone, at any time, let alone a pregnant woman. The fact that you carry your weight round your middle is an even worse indicator.

I speak as an overweight woman who carries her weight round her middle so this is no preaching post. I’m working on it.

Saying someone looks fat just means they look like they are carrying excess fat on their body. It's not bodyshaming. Unless someone knows her weight or waist measurement, then they can only go by how she looks. If you can see rolls around the midsection when someone is standing, for example, then you are seeing excess fat.

I dont need to do any research, Im happy to accept a ratio calculation for height to weight, that is used by medical professionals around the world is generally, for the most part, good enough.

You've come onto a thread citing its not good enough and OP, who is at least 4 stone overweight, isnt really overweight and its all bullshit. So if you want to back up your claims, then do so. Otherwise why mention it.

Being a healthy weight is very important when TTC, carrying and giving birth to a baby.

It is also easier to lose 10lbs now and 10lbs after the next baby, then trying to lose 20mins after the next baby with 2 kids.

However, you should take the BMI result with a pinch of salt, as these are just a rough guideline.

Perhaps focus on getting more exercise and eating a nutritious diet, rather than just worrying about losing weight.

If you are happy with your size and you’re not unhealthily overweight, then just focus on being healthy and don’t worry about your size.

Unless she is severely misrepresenting them, everyone in OP's life is saying that. They haven't mentioned her health, just said she should lose weight because she looks fat. There's been nothing about him joining her in finding and cooking healthy recipes, taking the child so she can exercise etc.

It doesn't mean she shouldn't lose weight but a bodyshamer isn't a supportive lover and it isn't the route to success.

I mean, I don’t need to make a valid argument - you can do your own research. I’m not Google.

Being able to carry more weight doesn’t mean you are healthy though. Someone carrying the same weight at 5,8 as I do at 5,5 does not necessarily have a healthier lifestyle than I do

That sounds like a very coherent and evidenced based argument. Well done

When not pregnant I tipped the scales at a BMI of 25 exactly and I looked and felt like a blob. And I'm taller than the OP.

Yes. I'm at the top end of a healthy BMI and definitely have belly fat I need to lose.

The OP says she has rolls and her belly, thighs and bum are heavy. It's clear there is an issue without even looking at bmi.

Where are you getting the part about her losing weight after her other children from? It sounds like she only has the one child.

What does that even mean? All BMI is, is a height weight ratio; the taller you are, the more you can weigh without being overweight. Seems pretty obvious to me.

It anything I think BMI is more likely to tell women that they are a healthy weight when actually they could do with losing some weight, and to tell men that they are overweight when actually they are perfectly healthy, because men generally have more muscle mass than women do. The impact of height will also exacerbate this, because taller people are likely to have bigger muscles. So if you're a petite woman who doesn't do weightlifting and your BMI says you are overweight or obese, you really are.

Do it for you, unless there has been advice from your doctor to the contrary.
Its your body but if you've lost the weight before after your other children, then I'm sure you will again. For your height , you are perhaps a bit on the heavier side. But if you look fine, and you feel fine then try not to be coerced .

medical

I disagree. But then clearly I am in the minority. My BMI is bullshit. Everyone I knows is bullshit. So I can’t be convinced

Nobody is saying that. Loads of overweight women are extremely pretty! However, OP has put on 4 stone in 4 less than years; from a very slim woman to bordering obese. It would be very noticeable to anyone who knows her; very different to if the weight had crept up over a couple of decades.

In terms of health, OP is not heavy; the worry would be if she gains the same again with another pregnancy. I also wonder if the people criticising the DH would really be so happy if their partner had put on 4 stone in 4 years.

This is why there are so many obesity related health problems in the uk. People are in complete denial. Unless you're an athlete it is fairly accurate or at least a good guideline