To find I’m still left with nothing each month despite it looking good written down.

I suggest you tackle this head on by writing down EVERTHING you are buying/spending for a week.

I suspect its many many little things that you're not really needing.

If you want to change and start saving you need to make some changes - but first identify where you are spending unnecessarily.

I get it, OP.
I live in 2-bed in southern England at a similar rate due to rental prices.
Is there any chance your ex will take over the insurance payment as it's for you both?
Definitely look at food and miscellaneous costs to see if you can make any savings there.

You must live in an expensive area! You could get a similar house in my area of England for less than £900pcm (nice suburban/village area). Lucky NI for not having to pay council tax! Hopefully you can get yours and ex's house sold soon so you can find somewhere else. I'd get the ball started today because your ex won't start the proceedings as he's living a cushy lifestyle at the moment.

Is DH only financial contribution the €54 pw ? Did I miss something, he's still living in the family home no mortgage to pay and you are forking out full amount for rent. He's not stupid,surely he knows that, morally at least, he needs to pay towards their home, until you have your share of sale.

I would start the ball rolling on it tbh and bring it up. I doubt your ex will, he’s comfortably living mortgage free

For now sounds like this is just the way it has to be for a while however surely things will get more comfortable or at least you’ll have money for a house if your husband buys you out your current home or if you both sell it you will get something?

BTW op every month all I have left in my main account is food money every single penny is allocated into its pot within minuets on pay day.
X amount goes to weekend money, x to Xmas, bday, holiday, petrol, insurance and all the rest...

Op break down what's left, so how much for food? 400? 500?
Put that aide for food.
How much do you need for days out each weekend?

Re Xmas and bday and holiday.. Save small amounts of what's left for these.
Start pots unless you have already eg 50 pm for Christmas, 30 pm bday, 60 for holidays.

Rest saving.

It may not seem like much and if one year when you start you can spend less on holiday and bday and Xmas, you will build u decent funds by next year.
Try and put 20 away each month for car stuff.
Also if you know what you spend on petrol also take that out along with food.. The divvy up the rest accordingly.

Your rent is very high so long term plan could be finding somewhere a lot cheaper. Life insurance is high too. The rest kind of sounds normal and you'd have a lot more money left at the end of the month if you moved somewhere with lower rent. Do you not pay council tax?

Obviously your rent is high. Once the finances from the split are sorted and you can buy, your mortgage would probably be lower. You will also get rid of the payment for storage. Nothing else on the list seems frivolous and you do earn a good salary. My only advice would be try to keep food shopping to £100 per week. An Internet shop once a week can help keep the cost down, rather than going into the shops.

Well, tot up what you spend on food. Look at what is expensive every week. If you aren't paying attention, you could probably save £100 a month just on that.

1. Milk is 90p a pint or £1.45 for four pints so get some pint containers, split & freeze.
2. Large loaves of bread, split & freeze.
3. Batch-cook chilli or bolognese and freeze half.
4. Learn how to bone a chicken leg. Each gives a large single portion of meat (easily enough for a hungry 6' boy) yet only costs 65p.
5. Use all the left over-veg at the end of each week to make a veggie chilli or veg & cheese soup.
6. Freeze fruit when in season (apples, blackberries etc) for pies & cakes
7. Frozen fish is your friend - fast, tasty, healthy, inexpensive, no waste.

Get a decent 'quick food' cook book. You'll eat healthier and save money.

50% of your income on rent/mortgage is extremely high.

If you're going to have to get a mortage on your own without ex dh, will the bank actually lend you enough? That level of repayment on your income level would usually breach affordability levels.

Is that €986 or £986. Either way, it's not a huge amount.

How much do you spend on food? I'm careful with food costs but still spent £250 a month on food for me and teen DS. Haircuts are £60 a month. Diesel is £80 a month. I have my ds all the time.

But it only takes for DS to have a field trip or grow out of his trainers and need a new coat, and that's another £100. He's into adult shoes now so hello VAT !

I've been a single mum for 14 years. I've learned to be careful with food. I grow my own fruit, salad & some veg, make batches of my own jam. I make school uniform last as long as possible (seam binding on trouser hems to make them longer etc). I use the second-hand school shop when possible.
I buy meat and fish in bulk, split into portions and freeze. The same with large containers of milk, Nothing goes to waste.
I have a log burner and free wood, so I avoid using the central heating for as long as possible.

I make it work but sometimes I think I've turned into my mother 😕