Why did school mum do this?

I have been told I've done this a few times... I would NEVER, EVER do so on purpose!!
I can't see well at all without glasses and can't hear great either.
If she gave you a hug then surely she didn't hear you.

I promise you..you’ve done absolutely nothing wrong. I have experienced this and have even accidentally blanked people. It is pure social awkwardness/circumstance. I think sometimes people blank for the reason they’re just showing loyalty to someone they’re chatting with. Sounds bonkers but people can be!

I think there's two options and only you can really decide, its really a case of time will tell.
She's either unintentionally blanked you and perhaps will chat again next time you see her. I'd give her a second chance just out of sheer curiosity.

The ones who did the purposeful blanking at primary school were all about getting people to volunteer for roles at school events. During the event they were all charm as they wanted the head etc to see how popular/effective they were. The next day, event over, crickets.
I also had a previously very rude and notable blanker, swimming up to me in the pool lanes asking about a secondary school she was interested in. Couldn't have been more chummy as she deftly extracted info. Really annoying too as it was so transparent and I couldn't easily escape from the lanes. I was polite and told her what she wanted to know as it was no secret. She barely acknowledged me ever again. Some people are just like that.

Best thing is to dust it off and focus on people who are responsive.

I often don’t wear my contact lenses on the school run, so if it had been me, I wouldn’t have even known you were talking to me!

You’re fine! It seems like a simple misunderstanding.

I think it's best not to take it personally, whatever the reason.

I have depression and have good days and bad days with it. Mornings are the hardest part of the day for me, especially if I haven’t slept well. Some mornings I’m fine and up for a chat, other days I can barely look at people. I know from experience this is common in people with mh problems. Maybe it’s something like that.
Or maybe she’s just rude. We’d need psychic abilities to be able to tell you. Maybe ask her?

Also, as others have said, she may not have seen/heard you.

I had this with a nursery mum. We had had conversations and then at pick up and drop off she would acknowledge my daughter but completely blank me. I was baffled.

I'm still trying to figure out how these school pick up/drop off interactions work. Some people will say hello one day and not the next. It can be disheartening.

As other people have suggested though, it could be to do with the busy-ness and the various distractions going on on the school run. I'm also bad at recognising faces. Sometimes it takes me a while to properly recognise people. I'm also quite socially anxious so often feel as if I'm getting it wrong but I suppose a lot of it is down to what's going with those individuals and it's not about me at all. I'm fairly inoffensive on the whole, I think!

First thing in the morning? She may not even recognise you after the evening before or had a hard morning getting her child out the door. I wouldn’t take it personally some people are just not talkative on the school run

Who do you mean by 'we all'?

You don't get to speak for everyone.

Lots of people have said perhaps she didn't see or hear her.

They haven't jumped to the conclusion that it was all about the OP 😳

Because we all would?

Have you discounted entirely the suggestions that she simply didn’t recognise, see or hear you? It sounds just as likely as her intentionally blanking you after you’d had a nice conversation and hugged 24 hours earlier.

As I said above, I once constructed an entire imaginary scenario where I’d unknowingly offended someone with whom I’d had a long, cordial conversation because she subsequently blanked me for months, only to discover she was visually impaired and wouldn’t have been able to recognise me on the street.

This doesn’t mean anything.

I am socially awkward, but I can look like I hold my own in a conversation just fine with people I know well; I’ve known a couple of mums for years.

I want to and am happy to get to know other school mums but it does bother me people may think I’m blanking them because I didn’t see them/recognise them/wasn’t paying attention etc.

It’s not all about you.

PsychIsMyFave
Yes, but if someone says “hi, (name), how are u” and gets ignored that’s seriously messed up. It doesn’t take much just to smile and say “I’m fine, how are u”

I seem messed up, I’ll be thinking of a billion things and possibly watching out for my child and I’ll just be looking ahead.

Sometimes I have to tell myself to wake up but it’s just like my body is in shock and I’ve a huge checklist of things to navigate but one of those things is ‘make sure you acknowledge people’ and I’ve missed it.

The people who know me well know I have days and will literally handhold my way into a conversation. There’s autism and mh issues in my family and I will possibly find out I’ve a huge amount of things to be diagnosed but I have also a lot to think/ worry about/balance and I’m not just calling nd, I see it in parents at the school gate a lot, they’re juggling in their heads/ worrying/ in a hurry.

That’s why I always speak up on these threads, because the good jugglers will never get it, they can converse and be sociable and multitask and they’re thinking ‘she’s just a snooty cow, or she’s up herself, or how rude’. (In my opinion only, I could be totally wrong and I’m just a lunatic!!!)

This is me and my appalling facial recognition, Yes, I might have had a lovely chat on Sunday, but if you are wearing different clothing on Monday, I won't know who you are.

I have been known not to recognise my own children when they have changed clothing unexpectedly, or had a hair cut - face blindness. It is a nightmare!

God I thought it was just me, obviously not reading these. I do notice that I attract narc types. So i created some distance and now don't say hi to anyone and keep myself to myself. It's much better that way. Some people are insecure, need the power or are just plain weird. Focus less on them more on you. I always think of the nice things I'm going to do later on. Some women can be really quite nasty.

I’m hard of hearing, but I would never blank someone I knew and recognised at the school gates. I would always smile and say hi in passing. Blanking is rude and unfortunately very common amongst a certain type of school mum.

My DD’s old primary school was notorious for having a lot of very cliquey mums. If you were in their gang, fine. If not then you were snubbed.

There was one Mum in particular who was downright rude to anyone who wasn’t in her inner sanctum. Standoffish, up herself and extremely snobbish. Would never say hi on passing even though her DS was in my DD class. I took to saying hello in a very light and breezy way every time I passed her. I bet it pissed her right off and I didn’t give a monkeys.

Another Mum also happened to be a TA at the school and my Dd and her DD were good friends for a while. She always blanked me until the girls became friends and was perfectly pleasant then. But as soon as they split the classes up for the next academic year the girls drifted and she went back to her rude self. She was known as the rudest woman at this primary school and was notorious amongst the other parents. Unfortunately rude behaviour rubs off on your children and her DD went the same way. My DD found herself sitting next to this girl in GCSE maths and the girl just blanked my DD most lessons. I perhaps should have stayed quiet but I did tell my DD that I wasn’t surprised as she was just turning into her mother!

Yes - I’m looking at you AA with all your rugby playing sons and your stick up DD 😂

I've had a similar situation. Got chatting to a mum and we got on well, she added me on FB and then we messaged a lot when we were on holiday in the same place at the same time last summer (not same hotel). Then next time I saw her in the playground she blanked me. Few weeks later I was in a group conversation and someone introduced me to her and before I said 'oh we already know each other' she said 'nice to meet you' Huh?? I'm still confused!!

I am socially awkward, like really badly! unfortunately i never know which me is going to come out in social situations i might tell you my life story or might be like a rabbit caught in the headlights because someone spoke to me, i hate it its so embarrassing but i honestly cant help it! There are a few people it doesn't happen with at the school but it is only because i have known them for years and years and they are used to my weirdness but new people must think I'm a right mardy cow.

Some people are just like this. A mum at my son’s school will talk to you one day then blank you the next day. I go into where she works and she’ll talk to me….she comes to where I work she talks to me but then see her around town and blanks me….i don’t give a shit it’s just weird af! People are just dicks sometimes

You're rude. It isn't about making friends, most of us don't care either way and have our own friends and family outside of school. But don't be a b just because you're busy (like everyone is).

Out of interest, have you ever had manners or has this been your attitude your whole adult life?

I think theres a difference between basic “hi” a nod etc and expecting friendship. In my case it was just a “hi”. I wasn’t trying to be this persons friend, it’s just civil.

She might be hard of hearing and needed to face you to hear you? I had a colleague like this.